Don't get me wrong...My baby son is the best thing that had ever happened to me. He really completes me as a human, and I've never felt so compassionate and whole in my entire life. But lately, (maybe the fact that it's dead winter depression) I've been finding myself and supermom have been devoting all of our time to him, and basically leaving nothing for ourselves. Not trying to be selfish, or anything, but I really miss my outdoor activities, and eventually I think supermom will miss shopping for her own needs. I don't know...
My other question is, at what age will parents be let some slack to enjoy time for themselves? 3, 5 10, 18, 21???never???
2007-01-15 09:35:52 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
FYI. I'm a dad, maybe with the time spent with the child, (half a mom).
2007-01-15 09:54:37 · update #1
hey mate, i am a dad too, i know what you feel. personaly, the only thing i am good at is being a dad, and its the only thing i realy wanted out of life.
but it gets better, once the kid starts school, you will find you have LOADS of freetime again and the kid will only take up alot of your time during the hoildays and weekends.
what me and my wonder woman do is every month we leave the kids at friends and go out for a meal togther. we started doing that once the kid was 3, its a good idea trust me
2007-01-15 11:35:36 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do I miss spontaneous sex, a flat stomach and perky breasts? Yes, I do. Do I miss spending an hour in a bookstore with a cappuchino, a book and quiet? Totally. Do I feel guilty about missing those thing? Not at all. Like you, I wouldn't trade my life back for anything, I adore my son. I know that and that's why I let myself some slack.
Now is the age. You and supermom need to work something out so she can have a self centered shopping trip and you can get out and have fun. My husband and I sat down and scheduled "us" time. Time alone is as important as time together as a couple. It's in the work planners.
Is there another couple you can do sitting swap with? We've been doing that with a couple in our neighborhood for a few weeks and it is going great.
2007-01-15 17:59:41 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I get where you are coming from. I have a 17 mo old and a 4 year old and your time is no longer your own. You rarely get a full nights sleep and you forget what having sex is about. However, I wouldn't trade them for ANYTHING. My 4 yo was great by the time she was 2 and now that she has favorite TV shows, we are up every 1/2 hour to change the channel. I still have to take my 4 yo with me whenever I leave te house or she will have a fit. Get dad to let you have some "you time". Take a hot bath with the door locked. Go get your hair done. Just go out for a drive. You might as well get used to being a mom. It is tough but it is the toughest job you will ever love.
2007-01-15 17:47:06 · answer #3 · answered by Tami C 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, I miss the life I had before the kids. My husband and I are always looking for ways to get a taste of our old lives. Our kids are now 2 & 3. Things are getting better - I'm able to take a shower when I'm home alone w/ the kids. I can watch an adult TV show while my kids have rest time. I can read a book while they play in the playroom. I see things as continuing to get better. I think everything depends on finding a good babysitter and not being afraid of leaving the child. I take advantage of any down time the kids give me.
2007-01-15 19:23:30 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think every parent misses the life before the kids. i suggest you and your wife agree that once a week you take the baby for a day and let her have a day for her and then she take the baby for a day and let you have a day to yourself. or even just once a month. getting a mental break is necessary not wrong. everyone needs them. if you aren't taking care of yourself then you can't take care of your baby. my kids are 5 and 4 and still no slack yet. so i dont' know when. i'm guessing once they are old enough to stay at home with no supervision. and you may want to have a date night once a month and hire a sitter and take your wife out on a date and just have time for the two of you to spend together.
2007-01-15 17:43:50 · answer #5 · answered by butter_cream1981 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, no. I miss the smell of car exhaust and my customers. (I was a service writer at a auto shop) I get to stay home and play with my children, enjoy the sunlight with my children, pulling them on a wagon, and I don't think I'll miss answering the phone and running through a 9 bay shop. I really don't miss anything, if someone offered to take care of my children and my children spent the night at their grandparents, I would watch old videos of them growing up, and call every second! LOL!
2007-01-15 18:09:19 · answer #6 · answered by fourcheeks4 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Supermom??? WTF?
Look...until the little rugrat leaves the house, you're stuck. I'm glad all that crap's behind me...I'll NEVER be a parent again!
2007-01-15 17:44:38 · answer #7 · answered by yo_momma_is_sweet 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My son died 2 years ago when he was 2. My husband and I were much happier then than now!
2007-01-15 18:04:00 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋