How do you feel about alcoholics anonymous meetings.?

Question

I thought it was good that my girlfriend was going until she started doing one of her cohorts.

Answer 1

Yep, this happens, not supposed to, one of their Cardinal Rules, don`t date another alkie, but..it happens. Usually ends badly too.
AA is great, it works, BUT, you have to follow the tried and tested rules..........

Answer 2

AA is a religious cult . The disease is a cop out as ananotherher person stated . go ot meetings and rehab spout some useless mind numbing thought stopping slogans and your off the hook for almost any thing . Just look at all the celebrities from Limbaugh if most of us were to have that much Oxy - contin on us we would be in prison . and each time the rich and famous get into trouble it is not that they are breaking the law or misbehaving NO they have a disease BS pathologiogizing every human behavior is a dangerous precedent OH Billy Wilson lets start With ST Billy his philandering and nicotine addiction I guess the Vaunted 12 step were not much good BTW he died wanting a shot some program

Answer 3

I think AA is a good way for someone who is really trying to overcome their addiction to find help. Unfortunately, I've seen it turn into a whining session, more than anything else. I'd like to think that the experience I've had isn't what's happening at all AA meetings, but it seems like they got off on bragging about how drunk they used to get. Personally, it's better to get help, then get on with your life, not constantly leaning on others to keep you propped up. And I totally understand the "cohorts" thing. It's too much like a mini-soap opera, some of those groups. Tell your girlfriend that trading one addiction for another isn't healthy. She's there for support, not a boyfriend. It's not the best of places to pick up a fella. <*)))><

Answer 4

I have been a member for almost 30 years and love these meetings. Although it is true that there is sometimes people who do use the 13th step it is not part of AA and nor is it recommended. By seeing another person who also suffers from the same illness as yourself it can be quite damaging when and if it ends or one of them has a relapse and begins drinking again. It is especially not viewed favourably for those who are new to the program as they are so vulnerable. You could go with your girlfriend and support her to these meetings and would be more then welcomed. Inform your girlfriend that she is going down a very dangerous path if she chooses to use the program as a dating service as it is not that but someplace to learn how to live one day at a time without the assistance of alcohol. Good luck to you both.

Answer 5

It's such a common problem in AA, they even have a name for it: 13th stepping.

http://www.soberplace.com/13thstep.html
(note how they shift the blame from the abuser to the abused)

People who go to 12step groups usually arrive at an emotionally vulnerable point in their lives. People with a little bit of clean time are seen as wiser and more attractive than they are and the program re-enforces this. These people prey on newcomers. Many consider meetings as a replacement pick-up place since they are no longer going to bars. Some will even ply the newcomer with alcohol.

At least 1 in 4 MARRIAGES break up during a person's first year in AA: http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/index.php?term=pto-19940901-000025&page=7

For all their talk of how "spirititual" they are, there are an awful lot of creeps and preditors in the rooms.

Answer 6

Doing one of her cohorts could happen at the work place or wherever. AA has done a lot of good for a lot of people. I have been going to Al Anon meetings for about a year and have learned more than years of school did for me. You'll learn not only about yourself, but about alcoholics. To stay with one is extremely difficult.

Answer 7

I've always heard good things about AA (and best of luck to your girlfriend in staying sober). "doing" a cohort...are you saying she's cheating with someone in her AA group or did I misread?

Answer 8

I've been clean and sober for over ten years. Never got much out of the AA meetings I attended in the beginning. Then again, it never occured to me that it may be a good place to meet women...

Answer 9

Is she sober?
AA helped me a lot, especially in early sobriety. If she started doing some other guy, it wasn't becasue she was at AA. She'd have boned somebody from the bar just as easily.

Answer 10

You mean another alcoholic in the group i think?

I think that meetings are good for alcoholics to go to, but I think you are just pissed your girlfriend cheated on you.