How to beat loneliness???

Question

this sounds so sad,but if i feel really lonely.I`m only 24 and my bf walked out on me and our son last week for the 2nd time.We had been together 6 years and he was my 1st love.I moved from my parents house right in with him,my son can`t speak as he has learning difficulties so i can`t even have little conversations with him.

Because it`s the 2nd time i dont feel as though i can let people know how upset and sad i really am and have no-one to talk to,my friends just tell me to move on and forget him,i wish it was that easy.

I know he doesn`t love me but i think it`s the company more than anything i miss,just having some1 to talk to and share funny moments with.I`m a shy person so don`t do clubs and stuff.

I feel like i`m going mad,i just keep imagining him doing ordinary stuff with some1 else and it hurts like hell,he hasn`t admitted or denied there`s some1 else but deep down i think there is and i want to hurt them like they`re hurting me and my son,advice appreciated,thanx.

Answer 1

I don't think you're lonely--it's too soon for loneliness. I think you're in mourning, and that's normal. This loser shattered your dreams. You need time to get over it. Don't get involved with a man for a while until you've worked thru this and like yourself again. Plus, your little one needs you! His dad is a jerk and he has his speech problems. So focus on the 2 of you as a team for now.

I've been in a similar situation. Life does get better! Good luck!

Answer 2

Hay nati,

You sound like a relly nice girl.

I've been in that possition before even though I don't have any children but know what your saying. I think it' s a good start that you have some friends, so how about getting someone you trust to look after your son for the night or even for a couple of hrs and go hag out with your friends just talk. Maybe go to a coffee shop on your own sit down order and i'm sure that at some point someone who comes to the coffee shop on a regular basis will see you there and strike up a conversation with you, It wouldn't hurt if you look up once in a while and smile to let people around you see that you are friendly. Maybe through some of your friends you might meet someone like you who is a mother and you could be friends with.

Remember life has it's ups and downs we all go through a time where we feel like there it no hope but I promise you that it won't be that way forever. Keep your head up high and no your better than your ex. I wish you all the best.
:-)

Answer 3

I am so sorry to hear that your boyfriend has walked out on you for the second time.
I imagine you sre feeling quite helpless,angry,and hurt.
I really dont want to advise you because I am sure you will find the direction that will lead you the best way forward.
I can make some suggestions idf you dont mind.
Please get yourself a teddy bear and call it your name,and hold it in bed of a night.
You say you know this man dont love you,and all the time you spend with him not loving you,is all the time you wont find love.
so let go of him and look for someone to love you,and someone yopu love,because wanting someone for company,and to avoid your feelings of abandonment are not the best reasons to be in a relationship with someone.
Firsty of all you sound genuine and honest,and those qualities alone arte good enough for many men,have a look at all the othewr qualities you have ,own them feel them and get this man out of your head.
stop being something he can just pick up and put back down whenit suits him.
inside of you wish him all the best life can offer him and let him go with love.
you may not feel good about being alone with your child at this moment in time,but put up some boundaries like making the decision toi stop him or anyone else from using you. take your power back and accept this relationship is not helping you but causiong you grief.and be patient and everything will come good for you and your dear child.

Answer 4

Take it from me..I have been there. I still go there sometimes. What I do it stay busy. I chat on the net with guys, I read books, I make jewelry. I do whatever keeps me busy and keeps my mind from wondering to whoever I don't want to think about. So ...the bottom line is get back into doing things that you enjoy but may have not gotten a chance to do in a while. Reconnect with old friends, meet a new guy...Girlie it will be OK. Just keep busy. Good Luck!

Answer 5

I know you probably still have feelings for him, but it's best for you to move on, although as you say, it's not easy.
I know what it's like to be shy and it's difficult striking up conversations with people face to face.
How old is your son? Does he attend school or a nursery group? If so could you chat with other parents there.
Failing that, why not chat on an IM with people. I'm sure there are many people here who would be willing to chat with you.

Answer 6

Girl I know exactly how you feel with regards to your man walking out and feeling lonely. It's awful and isolating. I don't know how many times I spent my evenings painting and re painting my flat humming away to myself just to keep occupied! There isn't anyone to share anything with and is awful. The little things your child does you want someone to tell but you look and it's just you! You feel angry hurt empty lonely frustrated an it's awful. The pain is suffocating like someone standing on your chest. I can say put the thoughts out of your head but that is down to you and it is hard! If you wanna mail me feel free! Even if it's just for random statements it's good to get it all out.

Answer 7

well i have a 4-year old and her mother and i dont see eye to eye anymore either. but here is the thing that gets to me the most she is doing all the ordinary and every day things with my duaghter that i cant enjoy. i missed her first word (daddy), missed the first, was there for b-days but not first day of school. so i guess what im trying to say is enjoy the time you have with your son. and if u are in need of a friend or someone to talk to like me :( well jst hit me up @ [e-mail] im sure we'll find we have lots in common. Good Luck and keep your head up :)

Answer 8

You can still talk to your child, but i know where you are comming from. You poor thing my heart goes out to you.Can you join a place for your child, that way you will meet people with a child or children, you could talk to them, have a cuppa.It is so very hard for you as your heart must be breaking.It is so easy thinking the way you do right now, but if he has done this to you he might do it to some one else and you are then so much better off with out him. PLease don;t take him back.

Answer 9

The way you are feeling is perfectly normal! and people wont be upset that you tell them how you feel, hell they would probably be more upset that you didnt tell them. I know its hard but things do get better! My freind went through all of this, and tried to take an over dose! due to way she felt....! But she got through it, I sat listened stayed with her a while and she is now fine getting on with her life and a hell of a lot better for it. Just hang in there and when you feeling low, give one of your mates a call... it will help!

Answer 10

Sweetheart maybe your ideas of him stem from the fact that you reliese that it's time to get over him.

Your number 1 consern should your child.

Just take each day at a time and don't turn to drinking.

I don't know how, but it will all work out for you, maybe in a week, month or few years but one day you'll look at this man and think "your not that great"

trust me sweetie, it will be alright xxx