what to do with a 3 year old who swears?

Question

she has picked up a very bad habbit and i don't know how to make it stop. we as parents don't curse alot, maybe like once a week i will say s**t when i drop something and my husband will use the f word in the car while driving. has anyone done something that works in this situation?

Answer 1

Below is an excerpt that I found on a site that addresses this very problem, as well as the link to the site.

"Often, a parents shocked response will actually encourage a child to repeat foul language. A simple, calm approach works better, "Tom, that is not a word children use. You may say "oh drat" instead." If the child persists, choose a quiet time to express your feelings, and set specific limits. Discuss why people swear, define what swear words are, and explain why they aren't acceptable in your family. Outline the future consequences for bad language - and follow through next time it happens."


http://www.practicalparent.org.uk/swear.htm

Answer 2

I was in this situation with a 4 year old that I baby sat for.I Would sit him down and explain why it was wrong to use those kinds of words. And when that didnt work...I would put vinigar on his tounge every time he said a swear word. And I must say that after 2 days I have never heard another swear word come out of his mouth. And maybe some of you say its mean but his parents were extremely excited that I had broken him of the habbit and it did absolutely no harm to him what so ever. But also you have to know that she is going to pick up on things she hears either from the TV or from you guys. So to further help the process I would monitor what he sees on TV and what you say in front of her. Good Luck.

Answer 3

All I did was explain to both of my boys that some words were bad to say and they stopped. A 3 year old doesn't really know what the word means, so I don't believe they should be punished for something they probably got off you anyways. Just try to stop swearing around them altogether, and if they do somehow come up with another swear word then just explain that it's a bad word.

Answer 4

Before resorting to the traditional methods of using hot sauce on the tongue or soap in the mouth, I would try to avoid "reinforcing" the undesired behavior by not giving it any attention at all. On the other hand, compliment and reward her every time you notice her doing something good. As you give attention to positive behavior, the child will want to repeat the behavior to obtain more attention.

Even if attention is negative, ie reacting in shock to a wear word, it is still attention and can be a reinforcer for continued salty language.

If after trying this for several weeks and you do not seem to be getting the results you need, I would use hot sauce verses soap. hot sauce, while hot it is at least edible where as soap can be toxic. However, do not use more than you yourself can tolerate.

Answer 5

When one of my 2 1/2 year olds overhears me saying something bad, and tries to use the word, i completely ignore it. Once they see they have no use for the word, it goes away. Luckily!! I haven't had much of a problem with it. Its only happened twice. Each time i just completely ignored the child when they said it. It might be hard to explain to a child that age it is a "bad" word, especially since they are increasing their vocabulary and learning other news words all the time. For me i find it easier to ignore them when a word they shouldnt say is said. That could work....im not sure what else to try, so far i havent had to try anything else! Good luck!!

Answer 6

Try explaining to her that these words are not acceptable to children and that as adults, you and your husband have the right to say them. If she uses them after that, put a drop of oil of cloves on her tongue. Hopefully this will deter her in the future. I used this method on my kids for swearing and lying. It stopped them until they turned 18. My reasoning is that just because you, as parents, chose to swear (does society even think of that as swearing now?), she does not have the right. If she wanted to drive, smoke or drink at 3, would you let her? It's time the world realizes that children SHOULD NOT have all the control. Good luck with your endeavor.

Answer 7

You need to stop swearing! It's that simple. Children learn by example.

Tell your child that there's a new family rule - no bad words. And let there be a punishment. If you say it, if your husband says it, if the kid says it - same punishment for all. (Clean the kitchen floor, put money in a jar, etc.)

You can go around swearing then expect your child not to.

Answer 8

I went through this not to long ago with my daughter, who is 3 years old. When she would say "F*** You" we would say "Thank You Too"... or "B**ch" we would say "Bench" and act like she had mispronounced the word. And when my husband would say these words I would get onto him and say "don't say the "f" word or "b" word" and now she does the same. We had tried getting onto her previous to the technique I described and she would hold the words in until she got angry, getting onto her and giving attention to the bad word seemed to have a bad effect. Someone suggested to me to act like she was saying a word incorrectly and it worked for us.

Best of luck I know how embarrassing this problem can be!

P.S. I can't believe some of these answers from other people!!!!

Answer 9

It only takes a parent to say something like that once around a child, and they pick it up. It doesn't matter if you say it once a week or once a month. She's learning it from you. She's only three. It's not like she learned the word and began to say it on her own.
I would show her that it's not nice to talk like that. Maybe a little disciplining. It's only going to get worse if you don't start now.

Answer 10

You have to show them that it is wrong to behave in such a manner. Tell them that you have to wash out your mouth when you swear as well. And get them to tell you when you do it. Then actually wash your mouth out with soap. Let her know that she will have the same fate if she swears. That way they learn unacceptible behaviour happens but there are always consequences for these. And it is fair because you get the punishment for being bad mouthed also.