She didn't even ask me if i wnated to be in her wedding party she just kind of told me and i don't want to spend the money on my dress casue its the worst dress i've ever seen... but i don't want to hurt her feelings or ruin our realationship.
2007-01-15 08:24:18 · 20 answers · asked by laydenirvine 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
suck it up and do it ..it will save you a lot of future headaches
2007-01-15 08:34:47 · answer #1 · answered by Love&Confusion 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Wow. Do you not have the money for the dress, or just don't like the dress? I honestly think this is a situation where you just suck it up and deal with it. Unless the dress is an obscene amount of money, I'd just go with it, in order to preserve your mom in laws feelings. Think of it as an honor that she wants you in the wedding party.
If you're close enough to her, maybe tactfully suggest a different design--in the same color. Go shopping with her and tell her "you know, let's see what this would look like, it may be more flattering than the first one you looked at." But in the end, the decision is hers to make, and you really should just respect it and move on. Donate the dress to Goodwill when you're done with the wedding, and take the deduction on your taxes.
2007-01-15 16:35:32 · answer #2 · answered by basketcase88 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Short answer: If you love your husband - grin and bear it!
Please don't tell her the dresses are "ugly" - it will hurt her feelings, not to mention that it's rude.
Nobody can kind of tell what you what to do - it's your decision. But you should probably explore why you don't want to be in her wedding party - that's the bigger issue here.
2007-01-15 16:52:44 · answer #3 · answered by jjem09 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, she obviously thinks a lot of you to have you in her wedding party. You should feel honored. And about the dress? You're just going to have to grin and bear it. It's HER wedding day. What if she had told you that your bridesmaid dresses were ugly? Put yourself in her place. Just do it.
2007-01-15 16:41:41 · answer #4 · answered by Stephanie D 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I am guessing your mother in law is getting remarried??? and wants you in the wedding?? I don't really see how you are going to get out of this one. Talk to your hubby about it but I think you might just have to suck it up and buy the ugly dress.......
I have been in the situation before with friends, sometimes you just have to do it.
2007-01-15 16:50:12 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if you don't want to be in the wedding, then just tell her that you can't afford to buy a dress...and as far as telling her the dresses are ugly..keep that to yourself. This is her day, not yours. What you like doesn't matter at this point. You just have to grin and bear it.
2007-01-15 16:32:53 · answer #6 · answered by photogrl262000 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
just tell her you can't afford the dress. if she says she will buy it for you then just wear the ugly thing and don't worry about it. it's only for 1 day. if you tell her the dress is ugly and you don't want to be in the wedding you could make things very messy between the 2 of you. so weigh the facts 1 day versus the rest of your life living in hell. i think i'll stick with 1 day.
2007-01-15 17:42:53 · answer #7 · answered by lidakamo 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Explain to her that you are honored (even if you are stretching the truth) that she is including you, but that you don't have the money to buy the dress. Perhaps she will offer to buy the dress, and then why not join the party? It will help keep from hurt feelings.
If she doesn't offer to buy the dress, then you are out free.
2007-01-15 16:30:22 · answer #8 · answered by Missing 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
If you don't want to ruin the relationship - stop thinking about YOU. Who cares if you don't like the dress? It's her wedding!! Just think how you would have felt if she had behaved as selfishly at your wedding.
2007-01-15 16:47:28 · answer #9 · answered by Chrys 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You have to be in her wedding and you can't say anything about the dress. Sorry, politeness goes a long way. Treat people well.
2007-01-15 16:37:25 · answer #10 · answered by twinmom 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
You say you don't want to ruin your relationship but if you say the things you want to you will. Maybe just explain that you can't afford the dress that she wants you to wear. I think that it's nice that she feels close enough to you to include you in her special day. Try to be as honest as you can and try to spare her feelings in the process.
2007-01-15 16:34:48 · answer #11 · answered by scoop6698 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋