Discipline at 15 months?

Question

My son is just like every other baby and is into everything and actually laughs at me when I tell him 'NO' in a firm voice. He grabs at my face and pulls my glasses of, again I tell him 'NO' but it just doesn't register.

I hit him once and I am so ashamed of myself as I don't want to go down that route, it had absolutly no effect on him and I felt so so bad about it!

I just don't know how to get through to him! I know he is only a baby still but what can I do?

Answer 1

You need to read up on levels of child development. The ages and stages are so important and you have to know what to expect out of your toddler.
Tool: Remove and substitute
Age: 6 to 18 months
How it works: Like the rest of us, young children learn by doing — so when your baby throws his bowl of peas off the highchair tray, it's because he's curious to see what will happen, not because he wants to upset you or mess up your clean kitchen floor.

That said, you don't have to stand by while your child does something you don't like. And you definitely don't want to stand by if your little one's grabbing for something dangerous. Take the object away or physically move your baby away from it. Then give him a safe, less-messy or less-destructive alternative. "Substituting something else will prevent a meltdown," Kvols says.

Make sure you explain what you're doing to your child, even if he's too young to really understand. You're teaching a fundamental discipline lesson — that some behaviors aren't acceptable, and that you'll be redirecting him when necessary.

Real-life application: Your 8-month-old keeps grabbing your favorite necklace and chewing on the beads. Instead of letting him, or continuing to pull it out of his hands, unclasp the necklace and put it aside, explaining simply that your jewelry is not for chewing. Then hand your baby a teething ring or another chewable toy and say, "This is fine to chew on."

Aim for some happy, relaxed times every day – reading a story, visiting the park, playing a game. Show a good example by remaining calm when times are stressful. This encourages your toddler to do the same. Cut down negatives – constantly saying ‘No’ will add to a toddler’s frustration. Instead, use phrases like ‘later’, or ‘after lunch’. Keep aware of new stresses (potty training, starting nursery) that may need more sympathy. Respect your child’s feelings. Feeling understood will reduce your child’s need for tantrums. Try saying, ‘I know that makes you mad’ or ‘That must have made you feel sad’. Your child will see that their feelings matter and can gradually learn to put them into words, saying “I’m angry” instead of acting it out. Use positive parenting – plenty of praise and attention for behaviour you do want, trying to ignore as much as possible behaviour you don’t. Avoid harsh discipline – shouting and punishments only make tantrums worse. Use humour to defuse tricky situations – silly songs, laughter, making a game of tidying toys can all work brilliantly! A hug or a tickle at the right moment can also change a child’s mood. Most children do grow out of the need for tantrums when they have more language and understanding. But the way you deal with them in the toddler years is important. If they are handled harshly, with responses like yelling and smacking, or if you constantly ignore their feelings and need for comfort, they may well become worse and carry on for longer.

Answer 2

This is tough. They are at an age that they don't really understand things. But they do understand "no" so it is frustrating as a parent. I started using the "Super Nanny" method close to this age. It is essentially a time out (sitting on the step). Sit them down, tell them what they did wrong and tell them they have to sit on the step and think about it. You have them sit there for one minute for each year of age. So for your son it would be 1 minute. When they are done, you explain again why they sat there, have them say sorry and then tell them you love them and send them on there way. I found starting around this age, the method is very effective when they were older. What I likes it that when I was really frustrated it gave me a minute to calm down before addressing.

Ultimately if you can not get through the best thing is to get a play yard that is large and put him in there where he can not get to anything until he is old enough to follow your instructions.

Hope this helps!
Jen

Answer 3

At 15 months he should know what no means. Hold his hands for about 30 seconds next time he does it and repeat no in a firm voice. If after a few times that doesn't work, have him sit on a 'naughty' stool for about a minute or so. If after a few times this fails a tap on the back of the hand may discourage him from trying it again.

Answer 4

Your baby does not understand the word "no" quite yet. All he does know is that when he does something he gets a funny reaction from you and he thinks it is a game. He is too little for any type of punishment such as a spanking or a time-out, he will not equate these things to what he is doing wrong. What he needs is your gentle, consistant guidance. Babies get into everything because they are learning about the world around them. Your best form of guidance is commonly called "diversion". This basically means that you do not tell him "no" when he is into something he shouldn't be, but you go to him and physically remove him, either by taking him by the hand or picking him up and taking him away from whatever he is doing. You do this calmly and patiently while saying something like, "Son, you may not push the buttons on the TV. Let's go into the family room and play with some blocks." Then you take him there and play with him. You may have to do this 100 times because he will test the boundries to make sure you mean business. He will learn by your consistency that you mean what you say. If he is into something, you can remove that from his access so he can not get into it. Children your son's age are not yet capable of much self-directed play. He needs plenty of guidance towards appropriate activities. Spend a lot of time with him reading books, taking walks, singing songs, building with blocks, putting puzzles together. Engage him in the activities you are doing. If you are dusting, give him his own rag to help. Let him fold washcloths when you fold a load of clean towels. Put him up on the kitchen counter or a sturdy stool with a dish towel tied around his waist when you make dinner. Let him stir things or play in the water in the sink. Try to not say only "no" to him, but be specific about what you don't want him to do. His vocabulary is expanding and he will understand a lot of what you say even if he doesn't have a lot of words of his own yet. Try saying, "You may not grab mommy's face, that hurts me." or " Please don't take my glasses, I need them to see." Caring for a toddler can be frustrating and exhausting. As a mom, you will make mistakes and do things you regret. But, kids are resilient and they'll be OK despite our inadequate parenting skills.

Answer 5

Hi,

In my experience with two kids hitting never works!!! Say No in a firm voice as u have been doing and remove him from the situation. Removing him is key to make him connect the No to the thing he has done. For example he is switching the tv on and off, say No firmly and move him to his toybox or another distraction.

He will get it eventually although it will take a while like anything repitition always works.

Rx

Answer 6

He's too little to get the message so you have to make the word NO mean something that he doesn't like.
When he's naughty say NO and straight away put him down somewhere safe like a playpen or his cot and then walk away.
Go make yourself a cup of coffee or something -
All kids hate being ignored so this should show results quite quickly. Two or three minutes of ignoring is enough. Just enough for him to wonder where you are and long enough for you to calm down 'cause it can be so stressful training little ones

Answer 7

It is far more effective to prevent a small child from misbehaving than to punish them. They do not have the self control to prevent themselves from misbehaving most of the time.

If you say "No" and he stops for even a second you need to take away the temptation and give him something else. When he grabs at your face grab his hand BEFORE it touches you (or move away quickly) and say "No hitting/grabbing/hurting".

Also telling him what he should be doing. Instead of "No grabbing" you could say "Touch mommy nicely", "Gentle", or "use your voice instead of your hands". Because if your son is hitting you it is probably because he wants something and if he has not other way of telling you that he wants something he will hit even if he knows it is wrong because he has no other tools available.

Answer 8

Loving Momma: that's mandatory immediately (the beginning up) that which ever way you elect to self-discipline which you carry on with via. do not supply in and enable it circulate by ignoring it . that's going to easily worsen till severe self-discipline project could be the outcomes. notwithstanding it might desire to be puzzling to enforce self-discipline on the start, i won't be in a position to precise the fee. If applied interior the beginning up, mark my words, she would be in a position to renowned you propose what you're saying and could pay attention and know in many many extra years yet to return! Time-Out is often an incredible place to start and persist with it!! tricky Love Does pay off w/disciplining!

Answer 9

create a naughty step and if he still doesnt stop after 3 warnings sit him there for a minute of his age. so for your son it's 1 min but if he gets up during that time start again for another minute. Sounds abit harsh but he will understand that what he has done is wrong. Also watch supernanny or nanny911 and you will get more ideas. Hope this helps x

Answer 10

Children are smarter than people think. What you need to do is kneel down so that you're at his level (face-to-face) and explain to him without raising your voice (talk to him as if you were speaking to another adult) why he shouldn't do what he's doing. I read somewhere that children expect to get yelled at (especially when they know they're doing something wrong) because they've been yelled at so many times before (and they eventually turn it into a game...or use it to get attention, etc.), so it would grab their attention if you reacted in a different manner (with a good explanation as to why they shouldn't do what they're doing).