How do you change a 4 year olds problem eating, sits forever not wanting to finish.?

Question

punishment and loss of toys does work but only temporaily. this is an ongoing issue ( year and 1/2 ), not every meal but the majority

Answer 1

Refusing foods, eating the same food day in and day out and taking what seems like forever to finish a meal? These are all part of normal toddler development. Some time after the first birthday, your toddler’s growth slows down so he/she needs less food. Appetite and amounts of food eaten will vary from meal to meal and from day to day. Toddlers become more interested in the things around them and less interested in eating.
Toddlers have small stomachs and may not be able to eat much at one time. They usually need two to three snacks during the day, along with their meals. Offer a variety of healthy snacks about mid-way between meals. Feed snacks when your child is hungry or thirsty, not for entertainment. Although milk and juice are good snack choices, don’t over do it. These foods are naturally sweet and should not be served too often throughout the day. If your child drinks too much, they may not want to eat solid foods. Other drinks like fruit crystals, pop, coffee or tea have no nutritional value and should not be given to toddlers.
Serve toddler-size portions. Let you child ask for seconds.
• Offer finger foods often.
• Introduce a new food along with familiar foods.
• Go easy on seasonings and keep foods separate. Young children prefer simply prepared foods.
• Present a variety of foods from the four food groups. Let your child pick from what is available.
• Present food in a way your child can handle, in bite-size pieces for example.
• Encourage one bite to taste but don’t overdo the coaxing. You can’t force your child to eat anything.
• Don’t bribe or reward with food. Present food in a neutral fashion. Also, DO NOT punish a child for not eating. This just reinforces a negative setting when it come to eating and food.
• Keep the television off during mealtime.
• Have your child sit with the rest of the family, at least for part of the meal.
• Don’t hurry your child. Remove the plate without comment after a reasonable length of time.
• Set a routine for eating. For example, foods are to be eaten at the table.
• Seat your child at a comfortable height to the table with feet supported.
• Eat with your child. Children learn how to eat by watching others.
What can you do if your toddler refuses to eat certain foods?
Respect your child’s wishes, even if nothing is eaten. Children will eventually eat; they won’t let themselves go hungry. Remove the food after a reasonable length of time. Be careful not to show your disappointment. Attention paid to not eating reinforces the behaviour of not eating. Food likes and dislikes change over time. A food refused today may be eaten next week. It may take up to 10 tries for your child to actually accept a food.
What should you do if your toddler is hooked on one food only?
Food "jags" are a normal part of toddler development and won’t last long - as long as you don't make an issue of them.
How can you get your toddler to try new foods?
Introduce only one new food at a time. Serve it with other foods that your child likes and at a time when your child is hungry and in good spirits. Let your child examine the food by smelling and touching it. Encourage one bite to taste but don’t force the issue if your child won’t try it. Don’t be discouraged if your child refuses it; try again another time.

Answer 2

If he's full then leave him alone. I agree with the person above in having him sit at the table and wait until everyone is done to disuade him from just running off to play but not forcing him to eat. Sure he should try foods even if didn't like them the last time because their tastes will change (sometimes by the week) but really does anyone make you clean your plate or eat things you don't like?

One thing you could do is use dessert as a reward and tell him that he gets 1/4 the amount of desert as he eats food. You'll have to explain this to him but it's like for every 4 spoons of dinner he gets 1 spoon of dessert.

Why are you going to fight with him over something so silly for a year and a half? I bet you and he both just dread meal times.

Answer 3

Punishing your child will not solve the problem. He /she will hate meal time all together. Maybe the portion is too big for his/her age and what you are serving may not be the liking of your child. At this age they can make some small decisions like if you give them about two realistic choices. You might want to involve him/her in the preparation to make it more engaging. When they are involved, they will eat what they prepare! Good Luck!

Answer 4

I'm thinking that you might be putting too much on the plate. My son was doing the same thing and it's because he filled up but there was still plenty of food on the plate so he couldn't be done (at least to us). Use smaller portions (I mean really small...4 pieces of meat, fruit, vegetables, and 3 spoonfuls of pasta. They can have more after the entire plate is clean. And here's an important part...no drinking for an hour before dinner....don't let them fill up on water, juice, or soda.

If they haven't finished their smaller portions by the time you're done with your dinner, then simply excuse them and no more food until breakfast. They figure it out quickly if you don't give them snacks that they'd better eat at dinner. They won't starve to death...

But you don't want to associate dinner/eating with punishment. It should only be an "eat until your satisfied" event not an "eat until your plate is clean". So long as they are eating a balanced diet it will be ok. That way they will carry good eating habits later into life.

Answer 5

Does the doctor feel that your son is getting adequate nutrition with his eating habits now? If not, maybe he could recommend some sort of supplement such as Ensure.

If it is not a nutritional issue, though, how about giving him smaller portions? If he doesn't want to eat, fine. When he gets hungry later and requests a snack he can finish his meal at that time. (That's what my mom did. It wasn't really a punishment... just not wanting to waste the food and it wasn't as if we did not like the food!)

If there's an underlying issue like he won't eat his meals but wants to fill up on cookies later, then that really needs to get nipped in the bud.

Good Luck.

Answer 6

I had this problem with my 3 year old. What I did was take the plate away. When she complained of being hungry later I sat her down at the table and gave her the same plate of food. Eventually she figured out that she wouldn't get any thing different to eat and more importantly no extra attention! But first make sure you are not giving to large of portions that would make it impossible for a 4 year old to finish.

Answer 7

The 4 year olds stomach isn't very big, so you should try to make smaller portions.

Punishment for not finishing a meal is horrible.

Answer 8

What do you mean, he doesn't finish? He may not be hungry. My little one (well 5) eats differently every day...when he is growing...it's more that I sometimes eat and other days, I can't get him to finish a happy meal!~

You shouldn't punish a child over not eating...your only teaching him to over eat and to eat everything that is given to him instead of eating till he is full....

Answer 9

People wouldn't be so overweight if they would stop eating before stuffed! I would encourage her/him to only eat the amount that he/she wants, but only after tasting a bite of everything. Then don't feed her again until next meal/snack time.

Answer 10

My 2 year old is starting to get to that phase too. He likes to drinks his fluids (mikl, apple juice, Ect.) but refuses to eat. The thing that is working for us, absolutly no snack throughout the day. If he does not eat his breakfast, he will not eat until lunch. And so on. He is usually so hungry by the time lunch comes around (or dinner, whatever the case may be) that he will eat all gone.