Why Do People Wear Colored Clothing At Funerals?

Question

In the culture that I am in it is common to wear black at a funeral, or dark navy. But why does a woman have to wear a green suit, or a white sweater, or a red suit?

I mean this is downright disrespectful. The day is focused on the deceased and the family, not on a church attendee who wants all the attention. And please don't say the deceased wanted to see them in red or green, because our culture is the norm black and everyone is the same culture at the funeral.

What do you think?

Answer 1

Wearing black is just a tradition when mourning. It really doesn't matter what one wears. The fact that they're there should be enough.

Answer 2

Perhaps the person comes from another culture?
Perhaps the person doesn't own anything sufficiently dressy in a dark color?
I'm not so sure its done out of disrespect. I go to lots of funerals and it's just not a big deal. Most people wear dark colors, but sometimes people don't. So I'm really serious when I say that perhaps other people, even if they come from the same culture, don't have the same feelings about it as you do.
I personally would rather wear a dressy, colored outfit than black sweatpants, if that was the only black clothing I had. Sometimes people don't have a lot of variety in their wardrobes.
I actually went to a funeral two weekends ago where I was one of the few women who was wearing a skirt -- most other people were wearing jeans. That is just the practice at that particular church.

Answer 3

It all depends on if you are going to a Christian/ Religious funeral or a Non Religious funeral. Christian/ Religious funeral people don't like to wear black and don't consider it down right disrespectful like the world does.

People know that the person is going to Heaven and not hell. So they/We know that it is not disresectful. And maybe they didn't have an outfit in all black, did you ever think of that. And maybe they thought that too many people were going to be wearing to much black anyways why make it more depressings. And maybe they wanted to lighten up the mood and remember the "GOOD TIMES" they had about the deceased. You do know its not all about the bad times at the funeral.

Answer 4

Our society and culture has changed. we no longer think it is important what one wears to a funeral. We ladies used to keep a funeral dress in the closet, that came first, the money spent whether we could really afford it, or not. And we kept shoes, and hose, and jewelry, too. We dressed somberly because it is supposed to be all about the deceased, and their immediate family, a guest is not supposed to be drawing attention to themselves by wearing bright clothes.
Our priorities have changed. It used to be that everyone went to every funeral of everyone you knew, however remotely you knew them.. It was the polite thing to do. Lines at a visitation of people waiting to see the deceased and share a moment with the family used to snake outside the funeral parlor, down the sidewalk, and down the street. .And the fact that the person was a public figure, or not, had nothing to do with it. Not anymore, I have not seen that in years and years. When my mother died in 1994, only one neighbor showed up, Mom knew everyone in the neighborhood, and was on speaking terms with all of them, no feuds. And my Aunt commented on the neighbor's attire, the neighbor showed up in a nice suit, it was fuschia. This lady had the means to aquire a dark dress, but did not. She had known my Mom for over 45 years, her daughter played with me until we were in High school, and grew apart. My Aunt's point was, didn't the neighbor consider herself to be in mourning, for a neighbor and a friend?
I think that part of it is the merchandisers, who sell the clothes. My dad died in 2000, and I could not find a black dress, anywhere, I looked and looked, in department stores and specialty stores, even discount stores. It was June, summer clothes were on the rack. I wore what I had in the closet, thank goodness, I had something suitable, and I got compliments on it.
I guess we do not ask for black clothes, so they do not see the need to keep them in stock.
Right now, I hope no one dies. Again, looked and looked for a black dress, found one, it was made of t-shirt material, and very unsuitable for a funeral, it was very casual.. I bought a brick red dress, very suitable in style, not color. If I have to go to a funeral, I'll have to wear it. and I will not be happy. And I will probably get talked about.
And. some people believe that they want to celebrate a person's life, not mourn it, and do wear red or green to the funeral. Really, I think we should respect the deceased' wishes, and celebrate, or mourn as they would have wished. It does not matter if they are dead, and won't know, it is a matter of respect.
Our culture just does not seem to have a lot of
that in these times.

Answer 5

I don't have a problem with colored clothing per se. But I do have a problem with scimpy clothing - I think you should at least cover the important parts. I believe that the event deserves respect. However - not every person has a little black dress in their closet. It should be enough that they thought enough of the family and the deceased to come and pay their respects. My family is very informal and we wore everything from a hawiian shirt to the proverbial little black dress at my own father's funeral. We would never presume to judge someone elses' choice of attire.

In many cultures it is more proper to wear white.

Answer 6

In the United States, black is generally considered the color of mourning. When someone attends a funeral, it is either to pay respect to the deceased or to show support for the grieving family. At a time like this, it is considered improper to draw attention to yourself. That is the reason most people forgo bright colors.

Answer 7

It depends. I've been to funerals/services where the deceased person specifically requested people wear colorful clothing. Also been to funerals where people are wearing jeans/t-shirts. Just don't think there are rules anymore. But, I'd go with black just to be on the safe side.

Answer 8

When someone has passed it is not about the color of clothes that you wear. Yes, traditionally people wear black. I know that when I pass I want people to come in what they are comfortable in. At the end of the day the family of the deceased don't care what you wear as long as you are there. I personally would not wear something as boisterous as you are describing, but to each there own. I as many people don't have a lot of all black things in their wardrobe and don't have the money to buy something on such short notice. There are a lot of different scenarios that may have come up that this particular person could not or decided not to wear black and that is their choice, and it is disrespectful of you to make such judgmental comments about someone.

Answer 9

In the United States, I can remember when it was black only. Gloom and doom abounded. Now things have changed. Thankfully, Christian funerals have finally become more about the celebration of a life well lived and a reward of eternal life with God. Of course there is sadness when a loved one dies because they will be absent in the flesh but we believe that means they are present with God. I attend funerals fairly regularly and I don't see a lot of black anymore. Different cultures have different customs of course and it is good manners to remember that "when in Rome, do as the Romans do!"

Answer 10

A sad truth is that we live in a day and age where people no longer respect the status quo. Some people are self centered enough to wear shocking colors to a funeral because they want attention. Mostly though it just shows that as a society we have abandoned many old traditions and statues that show respect. it is just sad but that is just the way society is today. We have lost what makes us beautiful and separates us from animals. It may be harsh to say but I was raised that with out manors you are no different from animals.

Answer 11

Many people in this country prefer to see a funeral as a celebration of life, not mourning death. Often times, the person who has passed has requested beforehand that the people at his or her funeral do NOT wear black, as it is seen as a dark, sad, morbid color.

By wearing colors, it helps people remember what a wonderful person the deceased was, and helps them celebrate the life he or she had, as opposed to dwelling on death.

This being said, it is still appropriate to wear dark colors to a funeral, unless the host has specified otherwise (which they often do.)