I am almost 22yrs old and have been with my guy for almost 4yrs now since I was 18yrs old, and My birthday is in March6th. My question is I know most people will say 30ish or whatever but I want to have a baby before i'm 30, any ideas in what age I should have mine at? I have a job and i'm done High School(not quite done yet!) Still have to go back and finish some things up. But I am mature for my age(at times =P) But I need some opinions here. I know I am ready just don't know when to have them any ideas?
2007-01-15 05:43:25 · 28 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
I love my boyfriend and I know he loves me, I was pregnant before but got an abortion because I was 19 and still young. I just would like some ideas, please don't be hatin' lol
2007-01-15 05:44:28 · update #1
at least 24 if you finished college and every other thing and your not in debt problems you might be good to go.
2007-01-15 05:48:01 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I am stunned that you would have an abortion at 19... it was not the baby's fault that you got pregnant... not only that, but you think you are ready now.. it has only been like 2 1/2 years since you aborted the last one... Anyhow, I would say that when you believe you are ready, then go for it. there is not a right age, and you should not depend on people to tell you when to do something like this.... My husband and I got married when we were 19, had our son when I was 20 (he was 21) and we are expecting our 2nd baby in 5 months.... We have been together for 5 years, and still get along perfectly... it works for some, but others are not so lucky... But like I said previously if you and you bf are ready, then why not try getting married first.... see if you two can handle that arrangement before you bring a baby into this.... Because just like a baby, marriage for some changes everything, and you don't want to find out the hard way, and be raising this baby on your own... so if your bf loves you, and you love him so much, then why should marriage not be an option.... Good Luck...
2007-01-15 14:13:25 · answer #2 · answered by Mommy of 2 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would say when you feel ready. Here are some questions you might want to ask yourself to see if you might be ready:
1. Do I have a stable environment to raise a child?
2. Can I afford to care for a child?
3. Do I have a reliable network of friends/family?
4. Does my better half feel ready?
5. Will my child(ren)'s needs come first?
If you can answer yes to most of these (#3 is great to have but not completely necessary) then I would say now. It's not a particular age that should be considered but the person. Just like children we all grow differently and make decisions based upon what we are capable of doing.
2007-01-15 14:25:21 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Age is irrelevant when thinking about starting a family.
You have to ask yourself some serious questions like:
Are you financially stable with good health care, and is this a job that will last a long time?
Are you emotionally stable and will you be able to handle a 2 year old with the stomach flu at 2 a. m. and still go to work the next day?
Are you sure your boyfriend will stay no matter what?
Being a parent is hard as hell but at the same time it is so rewarding. I hope you take these and other questions into consideration :)
2007-01-15 14:03:49 · answer #4 · answered by ♥sweet♥ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My grandmother always told me 28. Gives you time to grow up and get to a point in your life where you are stable financially and relationship wise. I think you have many years to go! We don't know you and can't tell you when and if you don't know then you are not ready & need lots more time. Just from the way you posed your question you can tell you are no where near ready to become a mother.
I think you and your boyfriend SHOULD be sitting down and discussing your future together and a thing called marriage before you are sitting down thinking of having a baby together. What kind of future is this for your child???
I don't think you're any more mature than you were when you aborted the first one.
2007-01-15 13:48:57 · answer #5 · answered by Heather 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Im 26 and my baby is due on the 4th July (16 weeks gone) so I'll be 27 when its born, hubby will be 28. I personally think having a baby before 30 is best but thats just my opinion, it isn't always that easier, depends how long it takes to conceive, work commitments etc. We have been together for 5 years and married for 5 months so we started trying straight away we got married. Depends on whether you are both ready personally and financially. Age is a number, go with your instinct and how settled ready you are.
2007-01-15 13:50:35 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is no perfect age, age has very little to do with it. I had twins (unplanned) when I was 19, was I too young? absolutely, but i got through it. I had help and support, and I can't imagine my life without my kids.
So when should you have kids, well here are my thoughts:
First, be in a happy and stable marriage. It's great that you and your boyfriend have been together for 4 years, but if you can't commit to marriage, how can you and him make a commitment to a child? He may seem like he'd make a great dad and like he loves babies, but is he gonna be there holding a baby when she won't stop crying for hours, or is he gonna drift back off to sleep? Next make sure that you are financially stable, it's great if both of you have jobs, but would you be able to survive if 1 of you loses your job and is out of work for a month or 2? Are you prepared to handle it if your child has special needs? Next you need to get this romantic idea of what having a baby is like out of your head, remember that babies grow up, they turn into mouthy, screaming children who learn at a very young age how to push your buttons. If you think those are only the kids on SuperNanny, you are sorrowly mistaken.
So ask yourself.... Are you prepared to cut your social life down to one night a month (and probably have to cancel even that sometimes when the little one is sick)? Are you prepared to deal with a tantruming 2 year old in the grocery store? Are you gonna lose it when your little darling grabs the scissors or permanent marker and destroys the sofa or your favorite shirt? Can you handle staying up all night cleaning vomit or diarrhea out of the carpet, and then have to go to work? That's what being a mom is really all about!
2007-01-15 14:20:13 · answer #7 · answered by who-wants-to-know 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
My advice would be wait until about 2 years after marriage. I had a baby when I was 17 so when I got married at the age of 21 we started off our marriage with a child. Its best to have time alone with your husband to have time alone to get to know each other married. Even if you have been together for a while it's best after marriage a few years. Any age is OK to have a child as long as your both ready, just give yourselves a couple years to enjoy each other first. Good Luck!
2007-01-15 14:19:45 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you have any education you want to get out of the way do it now. My daughter is about your age, and is mature too. She is already the mother of twins and has been going back to college a little at a time. It's hard. I'd wait until I were married first, though. If you and your boyfriend are both ready for the early morning feeding and changing diapers good luck.
2007-01-15 13:57:57 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you have to think about it, then youre not ready. I wasnt ready until I was 25 and I have been a nanny for the past 10 years! You should finish school and then think about it. Once you have a child, you wont have time to finish anything.
2007-01-15 13:49:22 · answer #10 · answered by valerie 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
28-30
2007-01-15 13:52:23 · answer #11 · answered by Kristi B 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋