Do yuou think 14 is to young to start planning for your future as in thinking of baby names?

Question

I just want to know becuz my boyfriends mom think were to young to be in love and to be thinkin way over our heads. But ma man said he loves me and wants to start a family with me in the future and stuff do you think were too young to be thinking like that

Answer 1

Trust me on this. I was 15 when i first "fell in loe" we basically had the wedding planned and everything was perfect. We knew when we wanted kids, what their names would be, everything. Then almost a year later, things ended horribly and very sudden. After that i regretting that we were so busy planning and thinking about the future, we forgot about the present, and i could have enjoyed waaayyy more time with him than i did. Also, i really think that if we would have just let things happen, and not thought about it so soon, we would have been together longer (we ended up fighting about what we WANTED in life in the future, and it broke us up) Now i am 18 years old (still too young to most people) and i am about to get married for real. My fiance and i have talked about kids before, and we know what we want, but we are letting things happen one step at a time, and it has made everything so much better. I do not believe 14 is to young to start brainstorming and thinking about what you guys want, but it is a little soon to actually plan. take your time and enjoy every second you have together, Marriage and kids will come in time, but for right now live in the moment. There is no harm in thinking about the future and what you want tho. I look back at when i was 15 with that guy and think, "what was i thinking?" even tho at the time he was "the love of my life" and all i ever thought about. Also, my fiance's mom had him when she was 14, and everyone was so suprised that he came out normal. A girl that young's body isn't ready to have kids. When the body is most ready to have kids is 20 years old (don't listen to people who say it's 25 or anything like that because it's not) and if you wait until then, then you will have school out of the way, marriage, and maybe even a house. It's worth the wait.

Answer 2

You're a girl, and from experience I know that a lot of girls have their baby names picked out at quite a young age (I'm 17 and I know what my kids will be called) however actually acting on this is a whole different matter. I don't mean to trivialise what you and your boyfriend have, but 14 is VERY young. There are so many things that you are yet to experience, graduating high school, going to college, getting your first paycheck and so on, and there are so many things that come along with this. Who I am now compared to the person I was at 14 is HUGELY different, and that has only been 3 years. In my opinion you shouldn't be thinking about kids (as in ACTUALLY having them) until you've both graduated college, have steady jobs, and the financial and emotion support necessary to bring a child into the world. I don't mean to be a downer, but the chances that you and your boyfriend will still be together after all that time is very slim. If you still are, then congratulations, but the changes that you are both about to go through are drastic.
'First love' is a funny thing... everything seems 10x more serious, and 10x more difficult. Experiencing these things for the first time can make you think that it will never happen with anyone else, I know I felt like that, but it's not true.
Good luck to both of you, but don't do anything drastic. A child is not something you do for fun, it's a life long committment.
Graduate high school, see the world, be your own person. Don't get tied down to a baby, OR a man, too young - you might regret it.

Answer 3

I say yes you should wait. Having a child takes a tremendous toll on your body, your finances and your life, and right now you have very little of any of those.

You may FEEL that you love this boy, in fact you may even THINK you love this boy, but honestly, at age 14 it is more your hormones than anything else. I know you probably dont wnat to hear that but think of it like this. If you are TRULY in love, then you both can wait until you are out of school, either high school or college. If the love is TRULY there, it will still be there then. There is no reason to rush having a child,

I had my daughter when i was 16. It was the hardest thing in the world, and i cannot express to anyone just how hard it is. Money, friends, living situations, everything changes. You are no longer just being told to take care of yourself. you then have another person who depends on you for everything.

If you cannot wait, at least wait until you are out on your own. Give yourself a few years of paying bills and experiencing life before making that type of decision.

You mentioned about it in the future... push your future at least 7 years out. Thinking about names also never hurt anything so i see no harm in that.

Right now boys are fun- in the future they are real (well sometimes they dont all grow up you know).

You can be in love- nothing wrong with that. but honey, you are WORTH waiting for. And nothing hurts by planning, just dont start to fulfill those plans until you are really ready.

because boyfirends come and go but babies are forever....

Answer 4

Yes but it doesn't mean that you guys cant stay together until you're old enough to start a family. IF you guys truly love each other then you'll be able to stay together until you're old enough. I had a guy telling me the same thing when I was 14 too and we were together for one year and ended up breaking up. Don't rush things b/c there's no better way of knowing if it's real then being together for a long time. I'm 18 and a senior in high school and I've been with my b/f for 2 years and we want to have a future together, but we also know that I've got 4 years of college ahead of me and he has 6 years of being the army ahead of him. Time is the best factor so please be careful and don't rush things. If he loves you he'll be willing to wait no matter how long it takes.

Answer 5

YES!!!!
At 14 you should be thinking about your future as in terms of career, college, grades.

When I was 14 I thought about things like how to persuade my parents into letting me have a dog or how many laps on my bike I could make, or where was the next ballgame taking place and how was I going to get there and back. I babysat! That took my mind off wanting any babies of my own for a while. Kids are a big responsiblity, not only food and clothing but medical and housing. Your whole life is surrounded by taking care of them 24/7.

Answer 6

Yes, definitely. When I was that age I couldn't wait to have a baby and be in love and everything. I have a 1 year old now (I'm 20) and even not being in school, and still living at home, its hard. You're always tired, you and baby get the same colds at the same time and you're not allowed to be sick, you have to take care of her. When they're sick, they cry, nonstop. I've been exhausted since I was about 3 months along, and I know I'm not going to be well rested anytime soon. Plus, her dad who loved me so much is a drug addict now, and just ignores her, even when we were still together, unless she was being the perfect baby, he didn't want anything to do with her. He didn't want a baby, he wanted a doll to show off.

Answer 7

You can't be serious . . . finish school then go to college and graduate there too. After you've done both of those and can get a job that might pay the bills you can start thinking about bringing another life into the world. Until then you are WAY too young!

Answer 8

Most girls have names that are their favorites and have decided to use for their babies. However,

At 14, you are just now discovering what love is and learning relationships. There are many stages as you grow older, you will grow into. Right now, you are learning to take baby steps. You are not ready to run a marathon. Most ladies are not prepared at a much older. Enjoy where you are in life. Don't wish it away. You have many freedoms open to you now that you will not have if you have a child. If you doubt me, go to the other relationships questions and read about mothers raising children or babies and the problems they are facing. I hope this helps. Good luck.

Answer 9

You have lots of time to have babies. If you really want a future with this guy (or any other) think in terms of what you can do now to ensure you have a bright future. You'll need an education in order to get a good job and support yourself. You have a lot of growing up to do....so if you want the grown ups to take you seriously start focusing on your goals and how you plan to reach those goals.

Answer 10

By all means think about it, and plan for your future, but remember that you are young and have your whole lives ahead of you. Dont spend your youth wishing it away, enjoy being young and having fun, after a few years of life experience outside of school and living independantly (hopefully you will be together still) then you will be more equipped emotionally and with more life experience and be ready to make the big step to have a family of your own.

Good luck, and remember to enjoy being young while you can, it only happens once!