My 20-yr-old boyfriend-thing-whatever seems to have the misconception that it is alright to make a girl fall in love with him for about six months, when things are going just peachy & fine, and then all of a sudden decide he wants to break up 'cause he doesn't want to deal with his future as well as a relationship. He really is a good guy, but I think his upbringing has had some weird effects on his mind, his family being hardcore Christians & him having rebelled some when he was younger. I've always known he's had problems & insecurities, but he did the same thing with me that he did with his last girlfriend two years ago--who is also a good friend of mine. Before, I was so broken up that all I wanted was for him to take me back, which he did after two days, & he even admitted to being happier again! But now he's saying that he simply doesn't want a relationship & doesn't want to make it work even though we could. I don't ******* understand this at all. Is there anything I can do?
2007-01-15 02:36:13 · 6 answers · asked by CrystalDreams 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
To elaborate, My wonderful b/f of six months broke up with me the first time last Saturday due to his insecurities about the future and my well-being, but I was able to talk him into taking me back because I knew he still loved me. And he did, saying it was one less thing for him to worry about and that he was happier. But now, of course, he's saying that he's confused and doesn't want to make it work, But I swear, I know he still loves me. It's just these weird psychological quirks that are getting in the way, possibly paired with his missionary parents being home and whatnot. But even if he doesn't end up with me again, I just feel that I need to be the one to make him see that what he's doing isn't alright and normal, and that it's selfish and ignorant. I don't understand.
2007-01-15 02:40:58 · update #1
Why would you want to stay in a relationship with someone who is outright telling you that they dont want a relationship and will not work on making a go of it. You are setting yourself up for heartache. Cut your losses and run this boy will eventually grow up one day I am sure, but do you really want to sit and wait for it?
2007-01-15 02:42:01 · answer #1 · answered by raewrn 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some 20-year-old men are too immature to really have a serious long-term relationship for very long.
He sounds like he is not ready to be really in an emotionally serious relationship.
If you take him back, he will probably just do the same thing all over again until he gets older and more mature or works at going to counseling to find out why he is so insecure.
2007-01-15 02:43:02 · answer #2 · answered by KAR36 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nobody MAKES anyone fall in love with anyone. You cannot BLAME him.
He is 20. He is young. Maybe he just doesn't want a relationship, or maybe HE'S JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU.
If he wants to end your relationship I am not sure what you can do. Kidnap him? Remain on good terms with him and maybe later you will restart. If you call him names/throw a fit he will just want you to go away.
EDIT these are not mental issues. He is just young and not ready for a committed relationship. If you want to call him insane for not wanting to date you anymore, perhaps YOU have the mental issues.....
2007-01-15 02:42:47 · answer #3 · answered by fucose_man 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
once you've been relationship 7 months, he could've been over that fiance a lengthy time period in the past, earlier even beginning as a lot as now back. And truly, he only sounds like a mendacity guy who needs to sleep round. i imagine that you deserve more suitable constructive than him, and it may well be superb to cut back all ties. If some thing, digital mail him or deliver him a letter that announces, "we favor to communicate. in case you're in any respect attracted to me, you more suitable constructive meet me at this position immediately on a thanks to be sure this out. in case you do not reply, we are by skill of." wish this allows. sense free to digital mail with some thing else mandatory.
2016-10-31 03:59:39 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
dump him so you come out on top and find someone thats worth having a relationship with
2007-01-15 02:41:20 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Make him understand. Knock some sense to him.
2007-01-15 02:40:27 · answer #6 · answered by White Shooting Star of HK 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋