I hate my mums job?

Question

im 16 and live alone with my mum, she works ridiculous hours as a train gaurd, shes always getting assaulted and injured etc. I want her to change jobs because she is 55 and she has a very sore knee so cant run after the crims etc.

Also its affecting my grades because i dont sleep until she comes home usually 2-3am.

She has a degree in human services and a diploma and stuff, but she is not motivated to change jobs, i get worried about her and stuff. what can i do to persuade her? i have tried telling her how i feel.. its also affecting her love life cos no 1 wants to go out with her cos shes hardly home and she puts the blame on me sumtimes! help

Answer 1

The job may not be in your mom's favorite line of work either. I am sure she is looking at the financial security it provides. It beats living on the street. I see you have a computer so it is paying for luxuries others do not have too and keeping food on the table. It is not easy to get another job at 55 years old. Many employers do not want to hire someone this old. I speak from experience. Your mother probably has benefits built up working as a train guard she does not want to give up either. The best thing you can do for her is make her life easier at home and do not complain, that only makes things harder for her. At 55, If someone comes along that really cares about your mother, they will make the time for dating her. If not they are not worth worrying about. Your worrying puts a lot of emotional stress on your mom and at 16 you should be more concerned about your school work. If you can not sleep, you should be studying. Do not blame bad grades on her either.

Answer 2

What a load of codswallop. Could you be any more self-centered?

I appreciate the concern for your mother's health. However...

The salary and the benefits from her job may be what's providing you with a roof over your head, food on the table, and clothes on your back.

Sit down and talk with your mother...without the teenage diva emotion...and share with her your feelings. If you approach this in an adult manner, she may explain to you why she is working this job. Then accept her reasons and stop blaming your low grades on her. Apply yourself to your school work and then get to bed at a proper hour.

Answer 3

There is really nothing that you can do.......

There is a Quote that says "When you are sick and tired of being tired and sick, you will change"......Your Mom has to go thru this...

If I were in your position, I would make sure that the house is cleaned and you should make some food for your Mom when she comes home....also tell your Mom that you Love her and how much you appreciate her sacrifice.....If you do these things, your Mom MAY start to change!!

Good Luck and don't internalize what your Mom says about you affecting her love life

Answer 4

Sorry, but I am not convinced that your concern isn't more for yourself than your mother. Maybe you could get a part time job yourself to help out family finances if this is why she remains in the job ? Maybe she has been so BORED with the standard wife and mother role that she gets a kick out of the challenges of this job ? AND would you have the same whinge if it were a father doing this job ???

Answer 5

It sounds to me like your MUM is a bit STUBBORN and VERY TOUGH!
She is STRONG WILLED, and STRONG HEADED.
She does not sound like the type to fall for any REVERSE PSYCHOLOGY crap...
Like ,"Oh mom your job seems so great, I can't wait to walk in your footsteps"...
So HMM???
Have you tried REALLY TALKING WITH her about it?
Then again, she is getting along in her years and it is difficult to find a NEW JOB in this YOUNGER AND YOUNGER AGED JOB MARKET.
Maybe you could take a job as an ENGLAND HIT PERSON, Make SOME BIG BUCKS, in a short time, and then your mom can have a VACATION...
And you can get a COOL NEW NAME like BUGSY or I don't know, uh...
Sudden Death LURKING, or something.
I don't know, try talking to her again.
Try to see if there was SOMETHING SHE WANTED TO DO when she was YOUNGER, and first got her DEGREE, Before your dad left and she HAD TO STOP WORRYING about WHAT SHE WANTED and settle down and PUT YOU FIRST.
Try not to worry so much about your MUM,
SHE IS VERY STRONG.
You do not have to wait up for her, JUST ASK GOD to give HIS GREATES ANGELS WATCH over her.
Talk to Him about what you can do to help her to MAKE A CHANGE as well.
DJH

Answer 6

properly initially... i don't "do" vomit. it is my husband's area. family members sensible, i'm 33 weeks pregnant, so something to do with bending on the 2d. My significant interest I hate is making lunch... purely simply by fact by lunch time i'm oftentimes finished my on a regular basis morning jobs (washing out, beds made, breakfast/kitchen wiped sparkling) and making lunch is the 1st step to messing up all my stressful paintings returned. heavily, on college days while the older 4 are in school, I often stroll as much as the bakery for a salad roll for me and a pie or sandwich for my daughter. that's how plenty I hate messing up my sparkling kitchen!

Answer 7

from the way u described ur mum,i think she's quite obstinate.well u can tell her frankly u stop everything but to work together with her everyday,any response?if she really cares n loves u,she w'd definitely stop u doing that,then u take this opportunity to ask changing her job immediately,maybe she w'd accept ur suggestions n advices.good luck.

best wishes.

Answer 8

My friends father is in the same situation. Talk to her about why she's there. Money? Employment? Explain if she were to die you'd be left with nothing and no one since she's a single mom. That will hit her...she's only in this for your benifit, so explain that it is costing everyone a little bit of their lives and thats never good.

Answer 9

Why dont you try hanging out at the train station for a week, the same hours as her. She should be concerned, tell her its the same for you. You feel worried for her just as she would for you. Might work, but be careful, ask a friend if they can come along. Its only an idea, dont do it if your not safe or prepared.

Answer 10

Apparently she chose this job to give you a better life.
Talk to her openly about these issues. Tell her how happy the both of you will be if she finds a better fitting job. (For the both of you).