i have been with someone for nine years we just decided that it wont work well he decided he is the person my daughter looks up to and loves i love him to but he wants to give up how do i give my daughter the news?she already has anxiety. what is the best way to tell her? please help.
2007-01-15 01:02:04 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
If he loves your daughter, you need to ask him to have the conversation with you. This is going to be a difficult task, but it has to be done. If he refuses, tell her the truth - that he decided to leave. Hopefully, she is old enough to understand the ups and downs of relationships. Then, start to do lots of activities with her to keep her mind off of him. He will eventually fade away. You have to let go of this man also. Since he wants to leave, let him. If you hold love and memories of him, so will your daughter, so after the conversation about him leaving, start to release him from your heart and memories. Good luck!
Finally, I say, you have to now think about her. Stay single until she is 17 or 18 from now on. Or, if you find someone, live separately until marriage. You wouldn't want this to happen to her again . . .
2007-01-15 01:45:23 · answer #1 · answered by downinmn 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
i'm unsure what led as much as all of this - notwithstanding if it appears that evidently like her Dad is giving up on his dating with YOU. i will assume that he's not giving up on his dating together with his daughter. So - you and her Dad is purely not mutually. yet that doesn't propose she desires to leave him. each and every thing from this element forward might desire to have your daughters terrific interest on the the terrific option of the precedence record. which skill you and her Dad paintings out parenting time for her - so she would be in a position to have high quality time with the two one among you. no one might desire to circulate a techniques away. You made her mutually and it is your accountability to stay interior an analogous geographical area so that's consumer-friendly for her to have a dating with the two one among you. Don not make this newborn replace faculties. keep in mind SHE did not fail at a dating. So - there is not any might desire to tell her that she has to leave all and sundry. Her time with each and each of you will purely be separate now - and there are sturdy issues approximately that - which you will tension. She'll have 2 homes. She'll have private time with the two you and pa. You and Daddy would be getting alongside extra advantageous because of the fact that's been so tricky so you might stay mutually. and so on. element out all the sturdy. And specific - you could say sorry and tell her that it is not what you concept might ensue - notwithstanding if it did - and now anybody will might desire to circulate on - in a important way. on no account ever ever badmouth her father. i don't care if he's leaving you for yet another lady - or he's an alcoholic - or notwithstanding - he's HER purely DAD. there is not any choose so you might assert something damaging approximately him ever. If he's a scumbag - your daughter will determine that out on her very own - in her very own time. each time she desires to renowned why Dad did this - or did that - tell her - "that would desire to be a sturdy element to debate with your Dad." His real colours will practice earlier long - and you will not might desire to be the undesirable guy saying undesirable issues approximately her Dad. keep in mind that Love and your daughter's properly being are the main severe issues right here. sturdy success.
2016-10-07 04:41:04 · answer #2 · answered by Erika 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to be honest and you can't wait to find a "good time" she obviously knows something is wrong so you need to talk to her as soon as possible. But before you tell her find out if he is going to continue being a part of your daughter's life. Will he want to see her? Will he want to be included in her school activities etc.? For all intents and purposes he is her "Dad" and she won't want to loose him in her life and shouldn't have to...even if the two of you are going your separate ways. If he is going to stay in her life then the two of you should be prepared to put aside your personal troubles to make sure that she understands that like divorce even though the two of you are splitting that doesn't mean that he loves her any less and wants to be there for her. Remember it is not all about YOU. Good luck.
2007-01-15 01:12:21 · answer #3 · answered by Barbiq 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Actually if this is not a mutual decision have him tell her. he will be better able to explain why he is leaving. Make certain you are there for comfort and support. Also discuss what will told to her before hand, you do not want to have the discussion with her turn into a finger pointing contest.
Good luck this is a hard thing for people to get through.
BTW will he live nearby? if so she can still see him with visitation.
2007-01-15 01:08:18 · answer #4 · answered by Richard Bricker 3 · 4⤊ 1⤋
a very difficult situation indeed. you cannot do it alone. your
husband should also be there so that both of you can fully explain to your child why you are doing that separation. but before you break the sad news to her, you and your husband should compromise on the financial/visitation rights, etc
pertaining to your child. dont think too much about yourselves but whatever you both come up with, should be for the good of your child who will suffer a lot emotionally if the separation happens
2007-01-15 01:11:24 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
i would have the both of you sit and tell her...just tell her that sometimes people are better off as friends and that just because you two will no longer be together as boyfriend/girlfriend doesnt change the way either one of you feel for her and that he will still be there to be a father figure to her...that its not her fault in any way...just basically reassure her that this will not affect the fact the he loves her...
2007-01-15 02:30:54 · answer #6 · answered by your1fool 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If they have such a strong relationship, then he should have the conversation with her. It would be better coming from him in this case. She will have questions for him that you can't answer. And I don't think you should feel the need to cover for him, especially if leaving was finally his decision.
2007-01-15 01:12:36 · answer #7 · answered by Lyn 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Both parents should do it together and make sure that you tell her that none of this was her fault because a lot of times children blame themselves for what happened to their parents and good luck&god bless!!!
2007-01-15 01:55:16 · answer #8 · answered by linda bug 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Since he is the one wanting to leave and not keep the family together, let him tell her in a very gentle way.
2007-01-15 01:10:10 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
Tell her it is OK to sleep around like you are doing.
2007-01-15 01:11:46 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 5⤋