Is there anyone out there who has tried or has or is recovering from addiction to drugs?

Question

I am trying to clean up from Heroin addiction and it would really help to hear from people who have personal experience, not just from drug users but also from their parents, children, partners, employers, ect. I have been 3 rehabs and managed to stay clean for a few years once but I always go back to heroin when things get too much. I really dont need judgements from anyone although no one could judge me more than I judge myself. I am a34 years old woman, I work for an estate agents in Central London and I live a double life. I have a methadone script but still use on top of this. I live on my own I don't socialise with anyone and my life consists of working then going home, scoring and using drugs to block out the loneliness and pain. Any words of encouragement or experience would really help. All I want out life is some happiness

Answer 1

You sound as if you would benefit from long term counselling to help work out why rehab fails at certain points for you. Saying that, you appear brutally honest about what you are doing- and you know using alongside your methadone is pointless...
You could do with some drug-free company, perhaps voluntary work or an evening class might help you meet people. I know there are projects in London to help users get/stay clean.
A family member (link too confusing to explain!) has been clean for 9 months now after 15 years using and several related jail terms. He doesn't know why this session of rehab worked better other than his determination to not serve more time.
Happiness is out there for you, you need to believe you deserve it though. I am sure you can do this, keep fighting- you CAN win. Good luck.

Answer 2

Hi, I really feel for you. I am 32years old and have been clean for six years now after being addicted to heroin and crack for six years. Initially throughout that time I tried to get clean and always relapsed, even using during pregnancy. Even my son being in special care and being weaned off the addiction I fed in to him didn't stop me using, in fact at that point I used even more. Before then I had been leading a double life and doing almost exactly what you are doing now. Personally, the turning point came for me when I was too sick to get up for my son's third birthday and I swore it would not happen again, that it had taken too much from my life already. I'm not saying it was easy but I was sick and tired of being sick and tired all the time. At that point though I had left my partner and was back living at home so my life was beginning to get better so I was probably mentally in the right place. This time there was no relapse but I didn't go back on methadone, I went to my Doctor and said as long as I could get sleep and not have the anxiety I would be fine, so he gave me the pills to help with those effects and I never relapsed. I'm sure it was just that I had found the strength at that point, otherwise with the best intentions in the world rehab is not going to help. I had to delete all my numbers in my phone and drop all my 'friends' (other users), it took strength and initially I thought about the gear every day, over time not so much and now almost never, though I will never forget. It nearly destroyed me and my family, the stakes are too high, I hope you find the way that will work for you (NA/counselling/methadone programme - none worked for me), but the key to success is out there and you will know it when you find it. I now have another son, a lovely home and partner and family life, it is SO worth it. You know how cr*ppy life is when you're using and you deserve some happiness, I am sending you best wishes for the future and hope for your success in beating an awful illness. Good luck x

Answer 3

Hello. I wanted to start by telling you that you are not alone. There are alot of people out there. I will tell you i also live alone and have no friends. My job i have i do not get a chance to be around alot of others. I also live a double life. I suggest a few things and this is where i started. First of all, Get into a support group NA or AA where you can talk or just listen. I just listened for a little while and then opened up a little. Of course it starts if you want the help which it sounds if you do. Also Go to supportworks.com or org That will list just about any support group you need. I know from personal experience isloation leads to loneliness and pain therefore you turn to something whether that be sex, drugs, alcohol. It does get easier but you have to make the first step by just going and getting out of the house. I know it is safe there but it will lead to a downword spiral. Go out to a group or two and see which one feels right and where you feel safe. Ladies will give you there numbers so you can get support and You will be encouraged to get a sponser. Dont give up! You are worth it!

Answer 4

I was sorry to read your story - I dont mean that nastily. I cant imagine wot it would be like to depend on something for happiness. Do you have any family members or friends? There is someone out there who would be willing to support you. I admire your honesty - it must have taken a lot of courage to ask for help. I think deep down there is a clean person willing to get out of your body. You can help yourself by urging yourself to give it up for good. Try to join classes or clubs which can help you meet new people. If you really want to give it up then only you can do it - no-one can force you. I can only imagine how hard it would be for you to give up something you depend on so much. You owe it to yourself to try again. I hope you manage to get clean for good...Im sure you could if you try. Try some new hobbies. I know you probably think who is she to talk but you need the will power to get happiness out of something other than a drug. I hope you suceed and that I have helped. Chin up :-)

Answer 5

I'm sorry you've got this hectic addiction to deal with.
And I'm even more sorry that you use the excuse 'to block out the pain & lonliness' as an excuse.

You've got to be strong ... stay in rehab if that's what it takes.
You're not only messing up your life, but the people who are seeing you go through this sh*t. My boyfriend had a coke addiction. It messed up my life when i found out. That was 3 years ago - and im finally over him.

You only have ONE life - it's yours - you take care of it!
Good luck!

Answer 6

all i can say hun is try all u can my step-dad is a user and we hate him for it he makes are life hell my mum is not in to all that but when she met him he wasn't like that he stills are stuff to fund his habit and its not nice for any one u unlike my step-dad say u want to change that is a huge first step but u have to stick to it try and stay with some one to get ur mind off it be strong u have a lot to live for and i no this might sound harsh there is not a lot of old heroin users out there u no y cos they don't make it to old age unless they quit young get support and get clean for your self and u wont be lonely any more

i really wish u all the best cos its something u really should do

good luck

Answer 7

im curoius about why you block out this `pain`. surely something in your life must make you happy. were all here for you & nobody will judge you. we all lead different lives sometimes but im hoping that yours will get better soon. all the best

gary x

Answer 8

Wickedness, injustice, grief, pessimism, trouble, loneliness, fear, stress, frustration, distrust, unscrupulousness, anxiety, rage, jealousy, resentment, drug addiction, immorality, gambling, prostitution, hunger, poverty, social corruption, theft, war, struggle, violence, oppression, fear of death… News about these issues appear in the newspapers and on TV every day. The popular press devotes entire pages to these subjects, while others serialise articles about their psychological and social aspects. However, our acquaintance with these feelings is not limited solely to the press; in daily life, we, too, frequently come across such problems and, more importantly, personally experience them.
People and societies endeavour to liberate themselves from the distressing experiences, disorder and repressive social structures that have prevailed over the world for long periods. We only need to glance at ancient Greece; the Great Roman Empire; Tsarist Russia, or the so-called Age of Enlightenment, and even the 20th century-a century of misery which saw two world wars and world-wide social disasters. No matter upon which century or location you concentrate your research, the picture will not be appreciably different.
If this is the case, why haven't people succeeded in solving these problems, or at least some efforts been made to remove such social diseases from society?
People have encountered these problems in all ages, yet each time they have failed to find any solutions because the methods they employed were inappropriate. They sought various solutions, tried different political systems, laid down impracticable and totalitarian rules, stirred up revolutions or subscribed to perverted ideologies, while many others preferred to adopt an indifferent attitude and merely accepted the status quo.
In our day, people are almost numbed by this way of living. They readily believe these problems to be "facts of life." They picture a society immune to these problems as being nothing short of impossible-a dream utopia. They persistently and openly express their distaste for such a way of living, yet easily embrace it, since they think they have no other alternative.
The resolution of all these problematic issues is possible only by living by the principles of the "true religion." Only when the values of true religion prevail can a pleasant and tranquil scene replace this gloomy and unfavourable picture, which is doomed to continue so long as God's limits are ignored. To put it another way, people are enslaved by these complications as long as they avoid the values of the Qur'an. Put simply, this is the "nightmare of disbeliefe" and the link below for this wonderful book:

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you will find how the regulation of life by the "norms of morality" introduced by the Qur'an revealed to mankind by God will banish the "nightmare of disbeliefe," how pessimism, corruption and social restlessness can be eliminated from society, how the individual can surround himself with an ideal environment, what spiritual and material benefits he is likely to attain by adherence to these norms of morality are gone into in detail, and finally, that the unique alternative to all these problems is the morality of the Qur'an.
So far, many books have attempted to deal with the social and psychological problems societies face. Yet, what distinguishes this book from others is its stress on the most realistic solution. It also sincerely warns people against the troublesome future they are likely to face if they fail to resort to this solution.
We expect that every reader of conscience will grasp that peace, mutual trust and an ideal social life is attainable only by embracing the values of the Qur'an and will turn to the true religion, which is Islam.
They will then happily join the ranks of those who never suffer, mentally or physically, from any of the above-mentioned complications. Around them, there will always be an abundance of favours, comfort, love, respect, peace and confidence, and moral virtues will prevail. They will know how to earn God's approval, by observing His limits and the commandments of the Qur'an. They will thus, by having faith in God, attain His mercy and at last enter Paradise.

Real happiness and peace can be ONLY found in submitting to the commands of the Creator and the Sustainer of this world. God has said in the Qur’an: (Truly, in remembering God do hearts find rest.)
(Qur’an, 13:28)

On the other hand, the one who turns away from the Qur’an will have a life of hardship in this world. God has said:
(But whoever turns away from the Qur’an, he will have a hard life, and We will raise him up blind on the Day of Judgment.) (Qur’an, 20:124)
This may explain why some people commit suicide while they enjoy the material comfort money can buy. For example, look at Cat Stevens (now Yusuf Islam), formerly a famous pop singer who used to earn sometimes more than $150,000 a night. After he converted to Islam, he found true happiness and peace, which he had not found in material success.
To read the stories of people who have converted to Islam, please visit

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At this web page, you can read the thoughts and feelings of these people, who are from different countries and have different backgrounds and levels of education.


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