Have I caught a nasty STD?

Question

I went on a train journey the other day which may have put my life at risk.

I bought my tickets and nobody batted an eyelid, or warned me of the dangers, or anything.

I had been sat on the train for over an hour and had got quite bored. I had absent mindedly put my ticket in my mouth, God knows how long for.

Imagine my horror when, after my ticket was inspected and I took it back and began reading it because I had nothing else to do, I saw "STD" printed on the ticket!!!

I had purchased a special STD ticket, without knowing! Surely there should be a sign up at the ticket office, or something? I had put the damned thing in my mouth, for God's sake! And, obviously, I was not wearing a condom at any stage of the journey.

I am now worried I have an STD and am going to die a horribl, painful and embarrassing death. Let this be a warning to other train passengers - beware the STD tickets!

What shall I do?

Answer 1

I f your lucky you may not have been infected ,
Learn a lesson from this
in future always wear a condom on your tounge.

Answer 2

Well first off ring the train company you bought the ticket off, they need to go to a clinic so you can both find out what STD you have and whether or not its serious, you yourself go get checked out 2! and I hope you have learnt to never do unprotected oral with a ticket you have only just met!

Answer 3

dont worry, i was passing by the train station so i popped in and asked about this, they said that just because the ticket had STD on it does not mean it has got an STD on it, unless of course you bought it in Nottingham in which case it is covered in aids and you will die shortly.

Answer 4

I have never experienced STD tickets on scummy trains. I would advise in future FIRST.

Answer 5

Haha - but you should be more worried if you touched those filthy seats with your hands - you may have picked up something worse (even fatal)....you should definitely go and see a doctor

Answer 6

i got it on the return ticket i went all the way and then i went back for more i've been to the doctors and he said allways buy and stay single that way you know who you are with

Answer 7

Hahahaha!

You made me laugh out loud much to the bemusement of everyone in my office!

Answer 8

When I w'r't Lad STD stood for Subscriber Trunk Dialling

gonnnor....ghona....gohna..... clap was called a 'social disease'

Answer 9

well id ask for a refund or at least compensation like a years supply of condoms

Answer 10

VISIT A HEALTH DEPT FOR A FREE TEST AND THIS SHOULD PUT YOU AT EASE. OR MAKE A CALL AND SET UP AN APPT AT YOUR LOCAL DOCTORS OFFICE. TELL THEM OVER THE PHONE AND GET THEIR OPINION AS TO WHAT TO DO.