do you wanna hear a "PROPHET MOHAMMED JOKE"?

Question

God frightens his devotees with eclips.

Mohammed said, "The sun and the moon are two signs amongst the signs of Allah and they do not eclipse because of the death of someone but Allah frightens His devotees with them. " Vol. 2:158

Satan urinates in people's ears, when they don't wake up for prayer.

Narrated Abdullah: the prophet was told that a person had kept on sleeping till morning and had not got up for the prayer. The prophet said, "Satan urinated in his ears." Vol. 2:245
Yawning is from Satan.

The prophet said, "Yawning is from Satan and if anyone of you yawns, he should check his yawning as much as possible, for if anyone of yuo (during the act of yawning) should say: "Ha", Satan will laugh at him." Vol. 2:158
Stars are missiles which God uses to hit the devils.

The creation of stars is for three purposes, i.e., as decoration of the sky, as missiles to hit the devils, and as signs to guide travelers. Vol. 2:158

Answer 1

In the name of Allah, the Gracious, the Merciful.

He it is who has sent down to thee the Book; in it there are verses that are firm and decisive in meaning - they are the basis of the Book - and there are others that are susceptible of different interpretations. But those in whose hearts is perversity pursue such thereof as are susceptible of different interpretations, seeking to cause discord and seeking wrong interpretations of it. And none knows its right interpretation except Allah and those who are firmly grounded in knowledge; they say, 'We believe in it; the whole is from our Lord.' - And none take heed except those gifted with understanding -

Thou canst warn only him who would follow the Reminder and fear the Gracious God in secret. So give him the glad tidings of forgiveness and a nobel reward.

Answer 2

1- Vol. 2:158 doesn't say anything about sun & moon etc.. it simply says: "AND IF YOU ARE DEAD OR KILLED YOU'LL BE BACK TO GOD" Vol. 2:158
2- Vol.2:245 doesn't exist in Quran [ last verse is 2:200]
3- you're using 2:158 again! and again it doesn't speek about satan.
4- 2:158 doesn't speek about sky, missiles, decoration.

You're a ****** zionist shame on you

Answer 3

The reasons for the creation of stars is among the funniest I have heard from the man. I have asked Muslims if stars were really used as missiles against jinns and instead of denying the hadith which would be the easy way to save face, many have actually told me "How do you really know ?"

Answer 4

I hope one day you’ll treat muslims as human beings, and start making questions related to you instead of hate. It is way more fulfilling than hate seriously!

One day you’ll relise that once you treat people equally and respectively you benefit and have a life worth living. You will then have a life you can be proud of and really focus on the important things.

I do feel sad you are this way, I hope you can see that.

Answer 5

Satan urinates in people's ear sounds so funny.Those guys at South Port or whatever ,know about this?

Answer 6

You are highly mistaken, there is no single world which is told by Mohammed in Quran. It is not just the book written in absence of Jesus Christ. Read Bible carefully you will come to know the actual truth. The verses of Quran are not easy for anyone useless like you. We belive in Mohammad, are you ready to belive Jesus. He dint got married so why do christains marry. Moreover, the poision of anykind cannot harm any christaian why you people drink wine instead of poision. This test is there in Bible to cheak out the actual christans..........prove yourself by dringking poision. There are more than thousands of verses in Bible whcih are wrongly translated. No christian can read Bible in original form where as muslims read Quran in its original form.
Join us and you will come to know the truth. Join Islam and be a muslim.......I am giving open invitation.

Answer 7

LOL!
Mind you, I NEVER PRAY! And the last time I checked, there's no urine in my ears... espically when I wake up..

And get a reality check man, stars are not made to hit the devil... even if there is a devil, I don't believe in such, he would be in the Earth's Core...

thanks for the laugh nonetheless.

Answer 8

You look me the son of Satan, conceived by the urine of Satan.

Sir Hitler the Great - Sir Hitler the Great - Sir Hitler the Great

Sir Hitler the Great - Sir Hitler the Great - Sir Hitler the Great

Sir Hitler the Great - Sir Hitler the Great - Sir Hitler the Great

Answer 9

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Your Mum must have laughed her head off when she had you.

No wonder she left you on the floor of the morgue.

Answer 10

so where's the punch line? sounds a like out there to believe.