I guess it's not a question, it's more of a statement.
I feel definitely very sorry.
I was soft and weak when I should of been strong and tough,
I was mean and hard when I should of been soft hearted.
I spent more of my time being keen on investment houses and saving money , but now I realise (now that they have grown up) that the most important thing was to simply be a really good mum and to have loved my children as much as humanly possible.
This is my biggest biggest regret.
2006-12-30 22:12:17 · 15 answers · asked by finally 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
I did the same... pursued a career at the expense of spending truly quality time with my daughter. We had a lot of problems when she came to her teens and long after that.... couldn't understand what went wrong. Now I do. I spent a couple of years "courting" my own daughter - sending her cards, calling for chit chats, being there for her when she needs me and above all, keeping my promises. Now, I spend a lot of time helping her with her two sons and being the grandma they could rely on. Now I can say I am a valued member of my daughter's family and I feel loved and valued. God is good. He gives us second chances. Keep hoping and praying and "court" your grown kids. You'll be pleasantly surprised at what happens. Becuase deep down, our kids will ALWAYS need us.
Happy New Year!
2006-12-30 22:19:51 · answer #1 · answered by Phoebhart 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The best thing you can do is to let them know that. Even if they don't talk to you, letting them know will help to heal any pain you feel you may have caused and then you can let go of the regret.
One of the biggest problems today is that people no longer just say the words "I'm sorry". It makes a very real difference.
Apart from that, the fact that you are aware of these things means that you're okay. Many people die not admitting to themselves. You are able to deal with the issue within yourself and realize that even though we all make regretful decisions at times, we also are able to learn from them. That's what mistakes are for, so in this way you're a success. So go and help make it better for the kids and you'll feel much better.
2006-12-31 07:26:50 · answer #2 · answered by Nel 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Regrets are like mistakes IF YOU learn from them. if no harm came to your children, and if they have children, they will see that it takes a lot to keep a roof over their head and food on the table. Apologize to them for what you did if it bothers you, and ask them to sit down with you and you all have a heart to heart together, and I am sure you will find out things are NOT as bad as you think it is. I raised my daughter from 1 year old till she got married and moved away, and I could not be there for her very much either. I had custody of her because her mom was unfit. I know there are two sides to every story, but if I had not proved my case I would not have been granted custody of her. I erred some also and not saying I didn't. I have no problem with her now, and do not see any harsh feelings on her part toward me about it. I think that you are feeling a little sorry for yourself, and it happens to all of us at some point in life, but it will pass. Good luck, and have that talk with them.
2006-12-31 07:59:48 · answer #3 · answered by Ex Head 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No one is a perfect parent. There is no perfect children either...We all make mistakes and we regret those mistakes at some point in our lives. We have heard that hindsight is 20/20. That is true. I certainly wasn't a great parent ..Wanted to be, but I fell short here and there with my kids...My career was the only thing that demanded my attention....more. But, now my kids have kids and I admire them for the way they are raising them.. Mistakes and all.. Maybe we weren't so bad after all...
2006-12-31 06:30:27 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My house looks like a bomb went off and we don't have alot of money but My kids know I love them and we do stuff together and I don't tolerate whining or letting them throw tantrums to get their way. Since I am strict in that area I am less strict in other areas. I probably could do with a little does of self discpline in the area of house cleaning lol. We all got something.
2006-12-31 06:15:45 · answer #5 · answered by xx_muggles_xx 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like it's a little late for regret. Anything at all you get from your children at this point is a bonus. If you're lucky, they'll feel some obligation to you if not love.
2006-12-31 06:55:16 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
never too late, Im only 18 but when I have children it will be important to me to have my parents be a part of their life, If you be there for their children it will make a big difference I bet. Also again I have no experience in this but I know as I become an Adult I am begging to veiw my parents as friends as well as parents, be a friend whenever they need one. They will come up against experiences they never have and you will probably experienced it and your advice will be useful to them
2006-12-31 06:17:43 · answer #7 · answered by Adam 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am sorry you feel this way. I think the best thing to so is:
1. share this thought with your children. It would mean a lot to them
2. do things differently with your grandchildren, children in the family, orphans, etc
We are human beings and have our limitations. Do not torture yourself over it. You did what you thought best at that time and place. Allah knows we try our best. This is what counts.
Peace
2006-12-31 06:31:45 · answer #8 · answered by daliaadel 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my 3 kids are grown up and left the nest now but they are my best friends we are all very close,i dont regret anything
2006-12-31 06:16:12 · answer #9 · answered by dumplingmuffin 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
By being there parents you have already been their saviour and you should not regret that....you have done the best you can and you have made thier lives complete.
2006-12-31 06:16:02 · answer #10 · answered by koda 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋