What is the worst thing that might offend a member of Jehovah's Witness ?from an old friend. Since she became JW she has stopped all contact with me. I'm not sure if I might have offended her. I have tried to contact her in Maryland several times to no avail. She and I were best friends as teenagers. Due they not celebrate holidays ,Bdays ? Or are they limited to who they can associate with? I sure do miss her after 25 years. The second husband was of this faith and soon she stopped keeping in touch altogether
2006-12-30 21:03:27 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
Jehovah's Witnesses tend to be busy people, since they take seriously the bible commission to preach the Kingdom "good news". However, this questioner's perception that the friendship has become more distant is widespread despite the religions of the friends. Her sad experience almost certainly has nothing to do with religion and everything to do with the hectic pace of life.
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2007-01-03 09:06:28 · answer #1 · answered by achtung_heiss 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
What you have described is not unusual. Although Witnesses are not forbidden to associate with non-Witnesses, it is strongly discouraged since a person who is not a Witness is viewed as an unbeliever, or bad association, regardless of whether or not the "worldly" person is a walking saint.
This is one of the reasons why many people tend to regard them as a cult, because of the highly insular nature of the group in regard to social activities. (It also makes it difficult to leave the group, since your entire 'network' is made of Witnesses who are required to shun you, not even a Hello, if you decide to leave and pursue another religion or path.)
However, just the opposite is true if they are making an effort to convert you. If you express some interest in the religion, you may likely find that your friend will suddenly have time for you. At the least, she would probably arrange to have a Witness call at your home and anxiously check on your 'progress'.
The possibility exists that your friend is simply busy and involved in her new way of life and is not cutting you out of her life purposely because you aren't a Witness. But the more likely scenario is that - unless you become a Witness - your friendship is probably over.
(If JW's sound like a lot like Moonies or Hare Krishnas in this aspect, it's very similar. But they are very unlike them in other respects, so please don't think I'm painting them all with the same brush.)
2007-01-03 22:41:33 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Funny that you ask that question I have wondered that myself. I know some co-workers who are JWs and they seemed pretty normal level-headed people besides the fact that they dont celeb any Bdays or holidays. However on Christmas some JWs (not my coworkers but other people who were also JWs that I have never seen in my life) came to my door while my family and I were opening presents, and it was kinda of awkward that they were trying to preach to us on Christmas day, I posted this as a question on Yahoo "did anyone have JWs at their door on Christmas day" and apparently one of them got offended because next thing I know I have a violation and my question was removed which I though was kind of odd as this happened twice. This experience has left me with the impression that these people may be a dangerous cult because a regular religion would not have members who become insanely offended over the most simple questions, so my guess would be that holidays or questions that involve holidays and people of "the world" that do not share they're views are to be avoided.
2007-01-04 02:55:18 · answer #3 · answered by Queen Kitty 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Actually, I see this question frequently in Dear Abby, not involving any religion. Women reach full maturity at age 24 and their whole view of the world and friendships can change, completely unrelated to religion. Males don't reach this point until age 30.
Yes, JW, like most religions, speak against close association outside the religion (with the world), but old friendships are make for good openings to discussing religion, otherwise known as witnessing. So, JWs don't specifically forbid it. The idea that the JWs specifically try to limit people's contact with the outside world is ridiculous as it defeats the purpose of being a witness.
Did she try to speak to you about her faith and you outright rejected it without allowing her time to make her case? You may consider studying, in order to better understand. You don't have to become a witness.
2006-12-31 09:55:01 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 0⤋
Hi. I am one of Jehovah's Witnesses. I am/have been in a similar situation with a non-witness/witness friend of mine. We have drifted apart for a number of reasons. As people grow up and get fuller lives our time gets taken up more and more. Interests change. Priorities differ.
As to your situation, there of course are the differing reasons I just mentioned. Also, as a Witnesses, we are taught to follow the Bible. Often times this means drastic changes in our lives and lifestyles. It can be equated to quiting an addiction or vocation. Any change can be hard. It may be that she feels being around people who do not necessarily have her same principles might be a hindrance to her new life. It also may be simply a matter of she is busy. You mentioned this is her second marriage. She might just be preoccupied trying to keep her life together. I know that I have a hard time staying connected to people. It matters not if they are Witnesses, Relatives, Friends or strangers. Life is hectic. Chances are she is just extremely busy.
2007-01-02 22:50:52 · answer #5 · answered by Ish Var Lan Salinger 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
"Since she became JW she has stopped all contact with me"
You are a "worldly" person to her. This is encouraged. You didn't offend her, she's been influenced.
"Due they not celebrate holidays ,Bdays ?"
They only have ONE holiday: the Commemoration, which coincides around Easter/Passover time. Other than that, they celebrate nothing else - nothing.
"Or are they limited to who they can associate with"
Yes, that is true. They're told to avoid "worldly" people (unless they want to preach to them). Co-workers are just that, co-workers. Classmates are just classmates. And their "spiritual brothers" are more important than childhood friends/extended family
Yes, JW's are a very secluded people. You did not offend her.
2007-01-03 12:41:00 · answer #6 · answered by cariocecus76 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
im sorry to hear that.. im a JW and i have and had friends that are not. When i first started studying some of my friends kept talking bad about witnesses and about jehovah and his organization, and insulting my beliefs they said that it was a cult and they had no idea how loving Jehovah really is. ofcourse i got sad and felt lonely and i felt like a had a desease or some sort. i realized that they werent my friends. i also had this one friend who didnt mind that i started studying. although i could not make it to her birthdays and holiday parties she told me that maybe we could hang out some other times. and we do. we go shopping and we take long walks, we go hiking and i she attends some of the gatherings i do. she knows that i dont use profanities so she doesnt use them around me, and thats a big deal because she used to use them ALL THE TIME. i didnt make her do any of those things that shes doing for me but she respects me. but as for your friend, if you know her address try sending her a letter. she might not talk to you for Millions of reason that we dont know about. maybe you said something to her that made her unconfortable. I hope that you get to speak to her.
2007-01-02 12:22:42 · answer #7 · answered by godisamor 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
In regards to your question:
No, we do not celebrate any holidays. If she is new to being a Witness as it appears you have said, she may not know HOW to explain it to you for fear of offending or upsetting you.
Also, as I have seen mentioned, newly married ones don't have as much time for others to the point of hurting feelings of friends (been there).
As to answers posted by others:
If we were in seclusion "as most cults are", we would in addition to not being in the work force or out and about in the world, we would not be here posting.
2006-12-31 23:03:33 · answer #8 · answered by girlinks 3 · 5⤊ 0⤋
Maybe she doesn't feel like you respect her decision. If not maybe you should just assure her that you do respect her decision. And no, JW's do not celebrate holidays or B-days. They follow the Bible in their life and they are encouraged not to associate with people who do not support/respect their beliefs. I hope that you two are able to mend your relationship because it just seems like a communication gap.
2006-12-31 06:23:08 · answer #9 · answered by joyofjoys 2 · 4⤊ 0⤋
JW's are discouraged from being best friends with non-JWs. However, they are not encouraged to cut them off entirely. Unfortunately, the most you can be with your friend is a casual acquaintance. She can still write to you on occasion without feeling like she's stepping out of bounds. Please don't take it personally, and realize that it is hard for her as well.
2007-01-01 12:08:26 · answer #10 · answered by O M 2 · 1⤊ 2⤋