I had been with my boyfriend for two years now. We had been having problems lately because I think he has been taking me for granted. I don't know..he doesn't show affection towards me as much as before when we were only going out for 7 months. Like for example, it is easier for him to say no to me now than before. I guess what Im trying to say is that it seems to me that he thinks he doesn't have to impress me anymore since we had been together for two years now. When we go out, Im not excited anymore..you know? I must admit our relationship is based on a routine now. Is this normal...to lose the thrill of the relationship after being with that person for so long?
2006-12-30 19:33:47 · 5 answers · asked by College GurL 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
it is normal to lose the thrill but you might also consider the fact that the relationship might have been just based on lust and not love.
2006-12-30 19:39:29 · answer #1 · answered by Ladie Alicia 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's normal, depending on how bad it is... after the first year/ 2nd year the "blinders" of puppy love come off and you see each other as you are. You don't feel as nervous or embarassed anymore(hence probably why he can say no, but do you want a yes-man??). But you should still have some feeling left. For me, if you think if you're happy, love is still there, and it's just a duldrums period, try new things. You can go out different places, try different activites, etc. But even in the long haul, not everyday is going to be sunshine and smiles. If your (not just you, but anybody) ideal relationship is a perfect no-arguments, no-problems then I pity you. Only from a little hassle here and there can we ourselves grow.
2006-12-31 03:44:36 · answer #2 · answered by That Guy! 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yea if you let it. It's true after years of marriage people become 'comfortable' because in the beginning you tried soo hard to 'impress' and 'keep' that person that once you've finally been convinced she/he's yours you don't have to be mr./mrs. 'wow' anymore, when in essence that's not true. Which means you have to talk to him, because he still has to be mr. 'wow' cause that's what made ya'll stick to each other in the first place. It may not have to be all the time, but for the sake of your situation....it has to.
THIS RIGHT HERE is half the reason people cheat...because they get used to each other and there's no longer the crazy fire, and so what do they do....they go right back to the crazy fire with someone else...because in essence it IS a repeat of what you had with your bf in the first 7 months.
SO, to avoid such a immature and immoral act, you tell him what's up, how you feel, and he needs to get on the damn ball to suprise you and get you back in that mode again...OH and let's not forget...SO DO YOU! Once it's known that he's losing his gf slowly but surely because he's too settled, he'll either listen as a good bf, or ignore it like a dumb*ss, and that's when you worry and start thinkin about kickin him to the curb...cause then it only gets worse if there's no mutual agreement to make this relationship work.
2006-12-31 03:43:35 · answer #3 · answered by Dennis 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I agree that after some time things thence to get mandune and people do take things for granted. This is the scenario you're in now. Advise him that you still need his wolf-whistle, his show of care and concern. Alternatively, you can demonstrate your care and concern to him and see if he reciprocates.
2006-12-31 03:38:25 · answer #4 · answered by SingGirl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
WELL I MY SELF HAVE BEEN MARRIED FOR 4 YEARS AND TO ANSWER YOUR ? I'M HAVING A HARD TIME IN THE SEX DEPARTMENT SO YES IT GET HARDER AFTER A YEARS OR TWO
2006-12-31 03:45:05 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋