One of my friends has one of his relatives serving in the army overseas and he talks to him sometimes via satellite. I was over at his house today and he was talking to him today via satellite and since i was in the room with him while they were talking and the camera was on i decided to ask him a question so i looked into the camera and asked him: How does it feel that knowing that you may be bumped off at any time? I was just curious and he just stared at me and they all though it was a rude thing to ask. What was the problem i dont know?
2006-12-30 15:39:02 · 25 answers · asked by SN 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
Yes, that was rude. You basically said, "Hey, you're going to die soon."
2006-12-30 15:41:07 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
Of course the soldiers serving in Iraq know that their lives are in danger--if they thought about it in those terms all the time, they'd probably lose their minds. Since you didn't know this guy, that was a really invasive and personal question to ask him. If it was your brother or something, that's a question that you could ask him man-to-man. But somebody you don't even know? Yeah, that was pretty uncalled for. You should write the guy a letter, and tell him how much you appreciate the fact that he's putting his life on the line to serve our country, and apologize for being so rude on the satellite call.
2006-12-30 23:43:47 · answer #2 · answered by kittenpie 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Of course it was rude. You come off as an insensitive, abrupt person with no sense of boundaries or understanding of appropriate behavior or social skills. I imagine that this is not the first time you have offended someone nor will it be the last since you don't seem to recognize how or why your comment was inappropriate. Just because you think something doesn't mean you have to say it out loud. Just because you're curious doesn't mean you should blurt out the first thing that comes to mind. A little sensitivity and thoughtfulness goes a long way.
2006-12-31 00:13:07 · answer #3 · answered by hairdvs 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes. he is in a very scary situation and talking to relative and you bring that up. The way you put it was pretty insenstaive. You could have asked to speak with him and asked how he was, how are things going, is he okay and wish him a safe return, but to remind him that at any time he may never see is family again was pretty down right rude. put yourself in his shoes if you were on the other side of that question and still there. If he was home then maybe i.e., how did versus how does.
2006-12-30 23:57:27 · answer #4 · answered by cheoli 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well since you ask, yes it was very rude and offensive. Lets say that you are a patient in a hospital and you are very sick, would you want someone to come in your room and say , Hey you may die, are you scared? If you were curious, you could have said, Since so many soldiers have gotten killed are you scared for your safety? That would have been more appropriate. I had a co-worker that had to go over there a few years ago and we chatted on Yahoo and I did ask him if he was scared, but I was not rudely direct. Most men and women in the military know the dangers when they go over there and understand when someone hints around about being killed. But there are proper ways to ask.
2007-01-01 02:30:25 · answer #5 · answered by tnbadbunny 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Good question but asked at the wrong time. He didn't know it was coming. After all, he did think that he was talking to your friend and you may have come into their discussion at a time when your question was truly the wrong thing to say. If you decide that it was the wrong thing to do, make it right and apologize. You would be showing far more class than if you to try to laugh it off and make it out to be all his problem.
2006-12-31 02:48:13 · answer #6 · answered by kennyj 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The way you worded it was rude. You might have asked him the following: "How do you deal with all the dangers that are there?" While that's a very watered down version of your question, it's a lot nicer. I'm sure the fact that he could be killed at any time is constantly on his and his loved ones' minds. He probably doesn't want to be reminded of it.
2006-12-30 23:44:57 · answer #7 · answered by Purdey EP 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, it was rude of you to ask such a question to a person who could be serving in a combat zone. They are under tremendous pressure every day,then you ask this?
It's a good thing he couldn't shoot you thru the camera,lol. Discretion is the better part of valor.
2007-01-01 11:35:17 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's an okay question to ask, but using different verbage would've been a good idea. The words "bumped off" are usually used to describe somebody insignificant.
I would've asked "what is it like to have to be 'on guard' at all times, I know I couldn't imagine it."
2006-12-30 23:41:36 · answer #9 · answered by Mickey Mouse Spears 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, that was a very insensitive thing to ask. Those guys live in fear every day and the rare chance they get to talk to somebody from home they just want to feel normal. So when somebody from home makes them think about reality when they're just trying to escape from it... well, that sucks.
Think about it next time.
2006-12-30 23:44:59 · answer #10 · answered by Bobbobla 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I just want to know how a little boy like yourself can be up so late. Isn't it past your bedtime? Take your teddy bear, go potty and get in bed. You aren't getting a bedtime story tonight. You've been a bad boy!!!
2007-01-01 23:51:54 · answer #11 · answered by vik 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋