I have been dating a guy for 2 years now and we live together. Lately we make plans to do something and I get a babysitter and then he stops by his friends house for hours. He says he is sorry and I know he isn't cheating and I am sure he just needs man time but how do I make him realize that he is hurting me ( I have tried telling him and he says hes sorry) and get him to stop doing this. It is becoming a bad habit and he thinks everything will be fine. But I am getting more and more hurt by this.
2006-12-30 15:33:21 · 11 answers · asked by mtkarens@sbcglobal.net 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Sweetie if words are enough to show him how serious you are it is time for some actions. GET MAD!
2006-12-30 15:38:02 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
You are almost describing what I'm going through. Not the living together and getting a babysitter stuff... but the thinking he can just get away with whatever and it's fine. Like you, I know with good reason that it's not other women or anything like that. But it's just him being inconsiderate. RIght now I'm very tired of it. He also thinks he can just leave things unresolved after he says his piece, and make me stay with mine unsaid. Then he comes back and expects it to be fine or for me to talk first.
Sorry, you just hit a nerve. As for why he's doing it, I couldn't tell ya. I think my boyfriend is being an idiot and just forgot just how good he has it. I'm not being conceited, but if you only knew... Anyway, I think this time I'm not gonna answer when he calls. I'm not gonna allow him to conveniently get out of addressing this problem. He's gonna have to come to me -- literally.
As for you, it's harder because you guys live together. He really CAN just come home whenever and expect things to be okay. If you have your own place, you have a lot more leverage in how to deal with him...
2006-12-30 23:38:43 · answer #2 · answered by Holly 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try working with him to arrange man time so he can hang with his friends, but with the understanding that if you two make plans that don't interfere with man time, then he's to be there. Gently and non-threateningly tell him that if he cannot keep his promises or work with you on this issue, it will really affect your relationship to the point of where you may have to move on.
2006-12-30 23:41:43 · answer #3 · answered by tranquility_base3@yahoo.com 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to tell him. If you keep it inside it'llit'll feel worse to you. Part of relationships are talking things out and sharing feelings. He'll probably understand. Him saying sorry isn't enough because it isn't stoping him from going with his friends every night.
2006-12-30 23:38:53 · answer #4 · answered by Sally 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Put your foot down. He could at the very least call you and let you know. You need to tell him clearly that this hurts you and if he continues it would seem to me that he doesn't care enough. You could show him the door.
2006-12-30 23:49:35 · answer #5 · answered by plaplant8 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hey its okay but maybe u should talk to his friends tell them to lay low for 1 night then make that night a surprise at home date candles and romantic food hope it wotks
dont call that first guy who answered
2006-12-30 23:39:04 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well he really doesn't know what he has untill its gone he'll reliaze that he did you wrong and regret it for the rest of his life trust me.
2006-12-30 23:40:32 · answer #7 · answered by Ms vanilla light skin thick chix 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
do the same thing to him, he will learn
the tell him y ur doing that
2006-12-30 23:40:22 · answer #8 · answered by puppy rocker 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Kick him to the curb. He does it because he doesn't respect you.
2006-12-30 23:39:47 · answer #9 · answered by noname 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I say you move on. Call me :D
2006-12-30 23:36:35 · answer #10 · answered by your_name_here 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋