I met this guy many years ago and he became one of my best friends. We are very close (not bf/gf type) and few months back, I felt that he was hinting that he likes me. I am not sure but that made me think a lot about him and I realized that I like him myself. Now, I pay close attention to what he says and does and recently, I don't feel that he is the same way anymore. Then I might have done a big mistake, I sent him an email asking him if he liked me and how I felt. He did not call or reply (even thought I said he doesn't have to at the end of the email). So did I screw it up? Not only that, I am afraid I screwed up our friendship. Did I scare him off? What should I do?
2006-12-30 15:11:50 · 13 answers · asked by Wynn 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Thank you very much for all of your reponses. He called me yesterday to hang out with other friends so we hung out all day. We didn't do much, we went out to bowling, then saw a movie and just hung out in the house for the rest of the night. I noticed that I tried to avoid his direct eye contact from time to time and I am not as talkative as usual. He seems like nothing ever happened. What does that mean? Actually, I started to think he likes. He was on the phone with her for 2 hours (but I don't know what the details is of course) and when I think of it, one time (before my confesstion), we went out and he paid a lot of attention to her. She is a lot younger, still in school, am I thinking too much? Should I forget about him and move on? He is the first guy I actually like and confessed.
2006-12-31 21:46:01 · update #1
Sweetie, I am currently living this scenario.
I have known my best friend Scott for 6 years now, and about a year and a half ago, I realized that I was crazy about him (I'm not for certain if your feelings for your guy friend are quite this strong, but you have made it clear you definitely like him a lot). Scott seemed to feel the same way about me, and we had all of the ingredients of a couple, just not the title.
Well, finally one day I told him how I truly felt about him. Know what? We haven't been the same since. He doesn't reciprocate my feelings and now all we do is argue and fight. I have found myself picking at every little thing he says and does and we don't spend nearly as much time with each other like we used to.
I said the same thing, "I screwed this up," but it took time for me to realize that I really didn't. And neither did you. You voiced your feelings and you are entitled to do so. No one should that against you. It's better to have said something now, than to keep it in for a long time like I did.
As far as what you should do...nothing right now, because there isn't much you can do. The ball is sort of in his court. He's probably sorting out in his head what he wants out of this situation. Give him a little time. If you haven't heard from him in a week, give him a call (be very informal, like any other time you may have called him to set up plans) and set up a "meeting of the minds."
This isn't an easy thing. I know. But you need peace of mind and he does owe you that much.
I wish you the very best of luck. I hope that the outcome is one that makes you both very happy.
2006-12-30 15:35:26 · answer #1 · answered by ♥Erica♥ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he is scared off or this ruins your friendship then hes not your best friend.....it might be akword if he doesnt like you like that but you and him will both get over it and move on......I know exactly how you feel though because I did the same thing!!!!!! If he does like you then you need to think about wheather or not you want to take the chance of screwing up your friendship.....good luck!!!!!!!
2006-12-30 23:16:42 · answer #2 · answered by tinkerbell 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need a face to face, direct meeting with him. People rely way too much on e-mail and IM in this generation which takes away from emotion. Call him and invite him for cofee. Then you will have your answer. Also, your feelings are your own and you have no reason to feel guilty for expressing them. Good luck!
2006-12-30 23:16:44 · answer #3 · answered by somerset 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Whether he feels the same or not, you did the right thing. How else were you going to find out where he's coming from? It's called "communication", and that's what you did. Good for you! Just give it a few days or so with him and try to relax. :)
2006-12-30 23:16:11 · answer #4 · answered by julesl68 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yikes!! Well, I guess you can assume he doesn't have those same feelings for you. If you can just subtly let him know that you've moved on and it's no big deal, then maybe you can still be friends.
At least you took a chance and you won't have to always wonder "what if".
2006-12-30 23:16:11 · answer #5 · answered by kyletexas_123 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First... take three deep breaths and relax
Now, how he reacts to your email is up to him. There may be other things going on for him. You are not in control of that. Accept that regardless of his response, you were communicating your true feelings. And accept that what ever happens was meant to be.
You will be okay.
2006-12-30 23:19:28 · answer #6 · answered by Just2BMe 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't worry. He's a guy, and he's probably just worried that if he tells you he likes you that it might ruin your friendship (yes, guys think deeply like that. well, the good ones) and he might value you friendship more than anything. Give it time.
2006-12-30 23:25:35 · answer #7 · answered by soccer_queen114 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
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2006-12-30 23:18:57 · answer #8 · answered by drkhrse099 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well the best thing to do is tell him how u feel thats all i got
2006-12-30 23:14:34 · answer #9 · answered by jessie v 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe you should call him or ask him about it. if he's your best freind, he'll understand. i don't think you did anything wrong.
2006-12-30 23:15:05 · answer #10 · answered by hope 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋