This Is About Gay People. If You Get Offended Quickly Dont...?

Question

See im 16 and i strongly dislike gays. Please dont hate me you gay people but being queer has always struck me. In fact, my uncle is gay, and because of that, I avoid him. How can I get over this?? I know you have a right to sleep with whoever you want but i don't know, convince me that I can look at you guys "normally". No offfence

Don't judge me, ok first of all im normal got damn it. Second im trying to deal with them because im sure i will have to later in life prolly in the work place, i dont think its a phobia but yea im tryin to deal wit it

If you are gonna say somethin negative please dont come here or even answer. second how can you be born gay? no its not just knowing who they sleep with. how they talk, act etc...some people can be gay and play it off well (my ncle didnt know till i was 14) and some you know when you see em

Answer 1

i am a bit of a homophobe myself

but have learned to live by this motto, as long as they let me live the way i want to and don't push their lifestyle on me i'm ok with it

Answer 2

WHAT OTHER PEOPLE DO IN THEIR OWN BEDROOMS IS NONE OF MY BUSINESS. Our sexuality is only a small part of who we are. It hardly defines us. Most gay men do not act exaggeratedly flamboyant all the time...

I was raised in a very conservative, strict religious, military home. I thought I was blessed with knowing truth in right and wrong and was quick to condemn the latter. Until, one day, my best friend and brother shook my value system to the core and cast doubt on all my truth. He was obviously in agony (in hindsight he had been for years) trying to tell us that he was gay. It was quite a warzone (interstate or not) dealing with my family for a year or two afterwards, but slowly we are all learning to understand and if not at least accept. And most of all we are learning what real love will heal if you let it.

It hit me one day in all of this, that I had a real problem with it too. But I looked at my brother, my best friend, and I knew he wasn't evil (like I had been taught and always believed). The more I sought to understand what he was going through: if my value system had been rocked imagine what had happened to his same system. Imagine if I felt weird around it how he had felt having the feelings he had. And how on top of all these confusing fellings he was totally alone. Worried that if the rest of us knew how he thought or what he felt he would be labeled defective. I digress.

My brother is an architect, a musician, an artist, a friend, an althlete, a grandson, a big hearted spoiled brat, a witty addition to the party, a career student and gay. I could've added so much more before gay. But I am hoping you get the point.

Often we are uncomfortable around what we do not know. Or what we are not accustomed to. But I would say it's a safe bet to assume you know a few gay people, you just don't know who they are - probably will never know (be confided in) from the sounds of it. What type of person does that make you?

Think about tolerance. Judge not lest ye be judged. Do you really think anyone would chose to have life be harder for them or their family? Do you think they are gay just because they like a challenge. People can not help their feelings.

It has recently been proven that there are chemical differences in the amniotic fluid between women who give birth to male babies that grow up to be homosexuals and women who have heterosexual sons.

I'm proud of you for seeking to be tolerant. How refreshing that a young man seek to understand rather than be understood. You are a credit to your demographic. bravo. Now lookup the word empathize and think about it for awhile. What a place the world would be if we all tried to see from each others perspective.

Answer 3

Don't worry I know how you're feeling. I'm a UU thereby I accept people of all races, religions, political affiliations, and sexual orientations. However all you have to do to "get over this" is get to know a couple of gay guys. You're uncle would be a good start. Get to know him. Hang with him. You'll see that he's really not all that different from any other guy. But yeah if a gay guy comes on to you then just tell him that you don't go that way. He'll back off. Good Luck.

Answer 4

Being gay is about a whole lot of things other than sex...It is about identifying with and loving someone of the same gender. Sure sex is involved because all beings are sexual, but we do a lot of other things together besides have sex. For instance, we go to the zoo with our children, we shop together, we do yard work together, some of us even go to church together! I don't think anyone decides to be "gay", it is just how we are and I for one am not ashamed. God didn't make any JUNK, so I am a valuable human being. If you saw me on the street you probably wouldn't identify me as "gay" because i probably don't fit the stereotype. As a matter of fact you would probably identify me as a grandmother...ha ha...because that is what i look like. I really hope you find a way to resolve this issue because hate is so damaging to the person who has it inside. It is like an acid that will eventually corrode your spirit. God bless you. The next time you see a little granny looking woman on the street think about your preconceptions. Is it the person you hate or is it just your preconceived ideas that may not be valid? Is that a gay person? Are they really evil and nasty, or are they just trying to live their life just like you? LIVE AND LET LIVE

Answer 5

Perhaps you feel threatened in a sense that they will come on to you and by you be friending a gay person you feel that others maybe will think you swing that way also. Be comfortable with who you are and you can still have gay friends without any of them coming on to you.

Good you want to get help for this. I'm a straight person but I have gay friends both male and female. And there very nice people you get good and bad in all walks of life. Just enjoy there company for themselves and don't get hung up on the paranoi of them wanting more than a friendship you should do fine then.

Answer 6

Well first I have to say I am not offended by this at all(I am a gay male) I think if i have the right to be gay and think its right I have to accept that you are allowed to think its wrong or immoral. The truth is that a lot of your friends and or family probaly have something about them that you might not agree with or like but you still associate with them. The one thing I can suggest is that for exmaple I am against drug use. Some of my friends do use drugs and I have told them that we can hang out and do stuff but when they are using or under the influnce to respect me enought not to associate with me. If you are unable to connect with your uncle on another level then you may just not be able to change your point of view and as I said you have the right to think and feel what you want:)

Answer 7

spend sometime with your uncle and get to know him, just ignore the fact that he's gay... they are just like everyone else... they have lives like work, and the gym... they have favorite tv shows and movies. they are "normal" the only thing they do different is sleep with the same sex. if you were to be friends with someone forever and then suddenly find out they were gay would it change your opinion so completely that you would cut off all communication? i mean talking about your best friend... i used to "hate" gay people too but now i know a few and they are just like everyone else... unless they are very flamboyant (spell check) and just scream at the top of their lungs that they are gay, i bet you can't tell them from anyone else walking down the street. it just sounds like you need to grow up and accept people for who they are, not for who they sleep with... in the end their personal relationships don't affect you and they are none of your business. you just have a lot of growing up to do... believe me, i've been there....i hope you figure this all out... good luck!
p.s. try a gay bar, they're loads of fun whether your gay or not.

Answer 8

People tend to be scared of things they don't understand. If you got to know your uncle you'd realize he's just a normal human being and the only thing different about his is his sexual preference. Start with this knowledge... being gay isn't a choice. If you don't believe me then try it. Look at someone your own gender and be attracted to them... can't do it? Well people who are gay cannot do it either. It's the way they are built and the way their brain functions. You can't make yourself like the same gender and they can't force themselves to feel for the opposite gender.

Answer 9

Sometimes people can talk about an issue bevause it doesn't have a face. for example, a friend of mine used to say "I don't like gays, and if one of them just tries to get near me, I swear I'll beat his face"...

When I came out, and he discovered it, he understood. Gays are notlike the movies. They can have a very "macho" look, they can make you laugh, they can be the sport star in your high school.

I think the best way you start acceting homosexuality is by meeting a good person, samrt, funny... and gay. Maybe your best friend can be gay, just... Wait and you'll see :D

Answer 10

being gay is not about who you sleep with, but rather who you love. And yes, to be able to love someone, you have to have that initial physical attraction.

Think about it this way.....a gay couple will go out, shop for food, clothes, cars, homes, pets, kids stuff, furniture, they will live, love, greive, lose parents and friends, get beat on, burnt alive, killed, shot down, and tortured within an inch of their lives, just because they love someone that happens to have the same set of genitels as they do........

Good luck, I'm not here to bash you, I find it very refreshing that someone who dislikes homosexuals can still find it in their heart to learn to cope with them. You don't have to like them to stand up for them.

Answer 11

OK, I have the opposite problem. I thought I was very open-minded and gay tolerant until I let a co-worker move in with me for awhile that was such a flaming ***** that I could barely stand to breathe the same air! I didn't let it get to me, though. I was able to separate his @ssholeness from his gayness.....