Should i be so angry?

Question

I'm currently going through a divorce. I was used and taken for everything i had. I was cheated on and used for no reason. The only reason i got was not loving me anymore. Even lied about by her to other people. All i ever did was love her and try my best to take care of her and listen to her problems and either try to make her feel better or fix the problem. I don't want to be so angry. I'm not that kind of person. What i've been wanting lately is revenge. But in the end i know that won't make me feel better. And i know that being so angry is only making things worse for myself. But i can't help it. Why is it that i so badly want revenge? Why is it that i want her to hurt as bad as me? There's really no point in it. But for some unknown reason i want revenge. Someone please help?

Answer 1

Grow-up and move on!
No wonder she's your ex.

Answer 2

I can't tell you how much i wish i could tell you what to do with your anger but I'm going thru the same thing as you. The wanting revenge will come and go, some days you'll be angry and some sad but it does get better. But the best revenge is to look your best and move on. Making her realize how happy you are, how good you look, and how bad she screwed up is the best kind of revenge, because you aren't doing anything wrong. So try exercising. It's great stress relief with some awesome benefits.

Just remember you're only normal and so are your thoughts and feelings about this.

Answer 3

she has hurt you so badly that you just dont get why she could have done this to you. She is a b***h, but you are right getting revenge on her is not going to make you a better person, she is the bitter one not you, you sound to be a real genuine guy and if you have heard that saying what comes around goes around. She will get hers one day and to be honest she will then realise that you were the best person that she could ever had. You know in your heart that you dont want to steep to her level and maybe it was the best that she left coz you would have been wasting all your enegry on somethink that really wasnt there. Instead of wasting you enegry on getting revenge, try finding someone else that will love you better, this way your not getting involved with her and she will feel jealous of you and your not even trying to do that. but dont let her stop you from finding some in your life....i know its hard to try and stop loving her but really she is nothing!!!!!!

Answer 4

I would be angry too, and you do have every right to be. You are right, revenge will not solve anything, and it won't make you feel better in the long run, BUT it will make you feel better for the moment. Wanting revenge is only natural and it is something you will probably not get over anytime soon, but remember kindness kills and try your hardest to keep the peace, fighting never really solves anything either.

Answer 5

I have been through the same thing..It is not unusual to have the feelings that you are expressing. In time it will get easier and you will move on... It takes to much energy to continue hating.. Let it go.. The best revenge is to move on and have a good life without her.. and remember what comes around goes around.. There is a consequence for every action and she will have to deal with her choices. You may never hear about it but it will happen Karma Sucks.... Don't let her take up anymore of your time with negative feelings etc...

Answer 6

I really think your not being perfectly honest and you want everyone to feel sorry for you. There has to be some kind of reason that she told you she wasnt in love with you anymore and only you know what it is. The best thing you can do is move on before you find yourself doing 3 to 10 in a state pen.

Answer 7

Don't seek revenge, man. A few years down the road you'll probably have a new wife and a family and you'll see your ex-spouse and think, "wow, i'm really happy with the family I have now." It's jsut the fact that this is all happening that you want revenge. Don't seek it and don't do anything dumb, in the end you'll be happy, maybe not right now, but you will be.

Answer 8

i know exactly how you feel. no i have never been in your position. but if you're a human being you will know exactly what another human being is going through. i understand ofcourse you're going to be angry and out of conrtol with some things. she played with your emotions and left you. even when you tried to make it better for her she still played you. it's human nature to feel this way. i would feel just as bad. but you said one thing that i agree with. revenge is not worth it if you were to go out there and did something to her you wouldnt feel better. believe you wouldnt. it would just make you feel worst,because deep within you know thats not what you wanted to do but you did it anyway becaue you wanted her to feel the same way you do. it's ok to be angry and you will be like this for awhile. but the less you think about and try to think positive, the better it will be for you. i feel it for you. you got married and gave your all while she took everything and left. and what she did wasnt not right. but what goes around comes around. karma. if you're trying not to think about it but you still are go get some counselling i think it would help. then you can tell him or her what you're feeling and you can release everything. it's good that you came out with what you're feeling. a lot of people would keep it bottled up inside until they did something that they would regret. like is about making mistakes and learning from them. i hope you will learn from this big mistake that you have made. when you got into you never knew this would have happened but now that is has you regret it. and it's ok. good luck and i hope you take in what i have said.

Answer 9

You want revenge because you didn't do anything to deserve what she did to you. I don't know what to tell you about the issue of getting over that and coping with the anger. Maybe you should talk to a professional about this, especially if it's going to affect your everyday life so much.

Answer 10

sweetie revenge is out of the question it possible turn dangerous and that's not good so if you need some help i would go to someone who you know gives you good information and sends you in a good direction

Answer 11

The best revenge would to be happy and move on. Don't call her and get your self another woman. Do things w/ this woman you would never do w/ your wife. She will get jealous that's how f**ked we are.