Who do you choose in love? security or passion?

Question

Oh my god! Please help! I am SOOOO confused! I am at a point in my life where every decision I make im pacts my future tremendously. I have never been this confused, so maybe somebody wise can help me with this. I have been with "john" for almost 4 years.This last year we grew apart, because we were trying to make our long distance relationship work. He wants to marry me, but he seriously annoys me, and I cant be my self! I have a child with john. John is smart and extremely motivated, and can take good care of me and my child. I am trying to do what is best for my child, but, another man named "bob" is who I have love for. He makes me laugh. I am truly myself and happy with bob. And we have passion for one another, something john and I are lacking. And I dont want to be one of tose selfish moms who chooses men over their children, but who do I choose, john, the more logical, secure option, or bob who is fun and funny and passionate. what qualities make a relationship work?

Answer 1

Good question! Do you see a stable future with Bob? Talk to him about what you want and see what he thinks. I think you should make sure Bob is ready to commit before you break things off forever with John.

Answer 2

I choose security,love,respect and passion.This is some facts about men,woman are novelty to men, if you are a new conquer to a man,they are fun,funny,passionate,slave,sweet ,generous. Once the relationship is stabilized, They get tired pleasing a woman. I bet on the long run Your Bob will change to John. If a woman want's a happy union of lasting relationship,she will be the one to continue to be passionate,funny,fun,inspite of tough job,being a mother,work at home and job,ect...If a woman does'nt want to make an effort to a man to make the relationship hot, and last for a long time.There is always a long line of men for her ,available for easy come ,easy go.

Answer 3

Passion. Think about this way -- Yes, you will be happy momentarily because you thought choosing "John" was "right". But in the end, you will never be truly happy because of the lack of passion in the relationship. Yeah, it may seem selfish for choosing "Bob" over "John", but when it comes to love? ... Love is never selfish.

Answer 4

I have been around the block as far as men go and I've developed a theory. The following qualities are what makes a relationship last assuming you have love-
1-respect
2-chemistry (aka passion)
3-good conflict resolution skills (aka good communication)
I am now very happily married. Good luck!

Answer 5

will it depends to you which one is the most important to you. is it for your kids future or your happiness. if it is for your kids then you should stick with John coz he can give you anything you want and he can give your kids better education and nothing worried about financial think about that, life is so hard to live having a financial problem. but if you choose live with Bob he only can make you laugh but nothing serious about his life so maybe later on he can't give you what you want and he can't take care your kids and you will regret that later on. so if im you you rather stick with John and focuse your attention to him ok.

Answer 6

u choose wat will make ur family happy money and security isnt everything its love ..jus knowing u have someone u can trust and can trust u back and will be loyal too u is enough to carry u thro life if u have that u can make it thro anything.. if bob works and is a good example for ur child then i would say the passionate one

Answer 7

try getting a baby sitter and go out once and awhile whith JOHN u guys can make it the passoin will come back my rents go through the same thing

Answer 8

Thats a tough question...I'd say try to find secure passion...but thats just me talking.

Answer 9

Always..choose passion...if you go for security you will just later be looking for passion....

Answer 10

You have answered your own question if you pay attention....you need to be with BOB.