my ex-gf was an a very complicated person ...and has a king of thinking that is completely different from what I am used to...her and I were really differents in terms of thinking, especially in terms of beliefs and even sometimes political views ...what is good for her, is what I was convinced was bad for me, and what is bad for her is what is good me ..it makes me suffer a lot, because I couldn't connect to her because of that, as if we were never on the same wave lenght, ...I spent months trying to understand her, and even trying to study her philosophy of thinking to understand why she is thinking that way, and I had to readapt myself everything ...I really lover her, but we were constantly arguing on issues, as she was the total opposite to me ... I have never come to understand her ,..It's only after I got out of the relationship, and after having a few research for months, that I finally understand her ..Have you ever experienced that with someone ?
2006-12-30 10:04:59 · 14 answers · asked by bobby s 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
yes
2006-12-30 10:07:07 · answer #1 · answered by ben c 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you really tried to see how she felt and sometimes you just have to agree to disagree and move on.
Not everyone is the same with the same ideas or beliefs. The idea is even though you may not agree with what the other person believes is respecting them and how they feel.
That doesnt mean you should change who you are or what you believe in. Sometimes time away from one another can help you understand a person better as well as yourself.
Id say this is a good learning experience for you and I think its wonderful that you tried so hard to see the other persons view even though it did not go along with how you were feeling.
Happy New Year... If you still care about this person, get in touch with them and maybe the two of you can talk and work things out if not let it be a learning experience for future relationships! good luck
2006-12-30 18:15:34 · answer #2 · answered by hopefloats 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well the fierst thing to remeber is that we can never understand people completly. Men are differnt by nature thatn wwomen we all know that so that may be part of the reasons for you belifs being different as well as upbringing. The main thing is to weigh the good with the bad and see which one wins. Most people learn as they go when it comes to building realtionships. Ask your self what the main needs you have are and also what you are willing to offer another person in return. If you spend all of your time trying to understand one another, you will be missing out on the most important things which is loving someone despite the differnces.
2006-12-30 18:15:41 · answer #3 · answered by java348 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do U know why U just understand her after U got out the relationship? Because U was serious about your problem, U was covered by the interlaced brain. Taking this experience to do good on the other relationship. Good luck
2006-12-30 18:11:32 · answer #4 · answered by forever 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Geez, if you have got this far without her, tryig to understand her dosen't matter. Am I right? Do you want to try to make a go of it now? If not don't worry about past relationships. Thats just what they are, the past for a reason. Move on. Believe me when you find the one you will not have to wait until you brake up to understand her. You will just understand one another because it was meant to be. (Even if you are opposites)
2006-12-30 18:14:42 · answer #5 · answered by Connie B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes! My ex wife was impossible to understand.
After 6 years I realised it was because she was more mentally unwell then I at first thought.
She quit her medication and I quit her.
P.S. after 7 months of dealing with her my divorce lawyer, a perfectly normal person with no psychiatric history, had to have therapy and, yes, it was blamed on dealing with my ex wife! Glad to say the lawyer has recovered and the divorce is finally over.
2006-12-30 18:16:40 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes i did. I was with him for a year and a half. I tried sooo hard to understand him and his way of thinking, but i just couldnt do it. We were complete opposites on religion (he really likes the devil) and we couldnt agree on anything. The best thing for us was to break up. Im glad we did because now im with someone who i can understand, you cant help someone with a problem you cant understand. All in all it was the best thing for me and him.
2006-12-30 18:09:34 · answer #7 · answered by Chrissy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes i have experienced that. some times you can repair your relationship. but sometimes you just have to take it as a learning experience and try to be a better person for your next relationship. You want to be with some one who has the same goals or beliefs that you do. its easier that way for both of you.
2006-12-30 18:11:22 · answer #8 · answered by cutencurley_05 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A relationship shouldn't be that hard. Things only get more difficult later on when true commitments are made. If you are having these kinds of problems while you are only girlfriend and boyfriend, you need to reassess. It's not healthy.
2006-12-30 18:08:32 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow Bobby that sounds exactly like me and my ex... it's hard to be with someone when their views and opinions etc are the exact opposite of yours, and what's worse is when neither is willing to compromise. I know what you've been through/are going through. email me anytime if you like :)
Happy new year!
2006-12-30 18:12:06 · answer #10 · answered by Green-eyed Nikki 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes and I married him you just have to work hard some people are just to different and will never make it in a realtionship you should just take some time and find someone who you have something in common with
2006-12-30 18:09:06 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋