Dog Bereavement?

Question

Hi All

I sadly lost one of my 3 dogs in a tragic drowning accident the week before Christmas. I am totally distraught and lost without her, she truly was a very special dog.

Cally was the playful dog out of my 3 (the other 2 are very docile and just sleep a lot of the time, they have always been like this). I really miss having a dog that wants to play fetc, get lots of attention etc.

I have always said that if anything happened to any of my dogs then I would rescue another dog as I feel I can offer them a great life.

How soon do you think I should look to adopt again, I have had dogs for 8 years and this is the first I have lost.

Should I do it sooner or leave myself to grieve.

Please no silly answers, any dog/pet lover will appreciate that this is a very tough time for me. Many Thanks

Answer 1

Allow yourself time to grieve first, rather than looking for an instant replacement, your other two may come into their own soon as they also will sense your loss

Answer 2

This is always a difficult one. I've heard people say that you need to get one as soon as possible to fill that empty void.

However, I lost my cat also near Christmas period. I was devastated and in moaning for quite some time. I think it was almost a year later that I got another kitten (another 2 actually). I never went and look for them, they just appeared to me one day (they were strays). It never really filled the void left by the last one. But did keep me occupied and I did love them dearly. Today a couple of cats has come and gone, and I have 3 altogether today. Still, nothing will ever replace the previous cats that I have. They all have a place in my heart.

So, my answer would be... whenever you think you're ready. Or you can do like I do.. wait until that dog strolls into your life. You'll know when you're ready. And whatever new dog you get, its never a replacement of your old one. You'll create new space in your heart for this one.

Answer 3

It's never too soon as long as it feels right for you.

Some people don't want to rush out and get another dog becasue they feel they are trying to replace the one that's gone. But if you feel ready, and you feel that you can offer a home to another dog, there are plenty out there that would be very grateful. It may even help you get over the loss of Cally if you feel that the reason she had to go was to enable you to help more dogs. I do think that everything happens for a reason.

If you feel ready, go to the rescue centre at the weekend and just have a look, see if any take your fancy.

xxxxxx

Answer 4

Hi there. I am so sorry to hear about the death of your beloved dog. I know in a way how you are feeling. Our dog a lovely Golden Retriever had to be put to sleep just last Friday. She was only 8 years old and ill for such a short time. My husband and myself are truly heartbroken and at this moment in time cannot think about getting another dog. I know it is up to the individuals but perhaps it is a bit soon. I don't think people understand what it is like to loose a beloved animal.

I would hang fire for the time being and concentrate on your other two dogs as they must be missing your other dog also.

Take care of yourself and remember we are going through the loss of our animal too so don't feel alone.

XX

Answer 5

Let yourself grieve. If you get a dog too soon, you might find yourself wishing the new dog was like Cally. I have been through this before, too, and it is awful. I lost my Beagle, Danielle, because of a snake bite after Katrina. Three months passed, and I thought I was ready for another dog....but I wasn't-I was disappointed that Daisy was not just like Danielle. Sadly, Daisy died, too before I could do anything. After Daisy died, I waited 6 more months before I adopted Spike. Sometimes I still get sad, but I feel happy too because I adopted Spike from the animal shelter and now he has a loving home.
Check out the website:
www.aplb.org
There is a chat room and there are people that understand what you are going through and they can help you.
I am sorry for your loss.

Answer 6

I am so sorry for your loss. You must do what is right for you.
3 years ago I got 2 rescue kittens. After 2 weeks on deveolped a lesion on its brain and had to be put to sleep (I know not the same as I hadn't had long but was gutted as I had got them after my beloved elderly cat had died and was a bit raw) the vets receptionist bundled me into the back where they had some abandoned kittens and made me pick one and sent me off with it tears still streaming down my face. Al though I do think that was too soon it certainly helped me get over my loss (es) as had to settle her in with the other kitten. She is now a lovely cat who my family and dog adores and she has a safe and loving home.
I hope that you find some peace soon from your grief - dogs are like babies in alot of ways and to lose one in such an awful way must have been awful.
Good luck with whatever you decide to do

Answer 7

Firstly, I'm very sorry for your loss. We lost our dog last summer and it was heart wrenching. Only you can decide when it's the right time to get another dog- everyone grieves differently. Ofcourse you have to consider your other two dogs and the effect having another dog with have on them, but as you are considering getting a rescue dog (a wonderful thing to do) the rescue centre will help you find the right dog for you and one that will get on well with your two other dogs.
Allow yourself the time to get over the initial loss, i found great comfort in our other dog, who obviously noticed the loss too.
You will know when the time is right. Warm wishes at this sad time.

Answer 8

I know so well how you feel. I lost both of my Border Terriers within two years of each other. I didn't think I'd ever find another dog and didn't know if I wanted to.
Some people told me to wait others told me to get another straight away. I did not know what to do.
Then one night I was on the internet looking at puppies and I saw a Patterdale. I hummed and harred and carried on looking. Then on another site there he was again.
The next day I drove over three hundred miles to see him and fell in love. I've had little Barney for almost a year now and wouldn't be without him.
I guess what I'm saying is that you will know when you find your next dog. It may not be today or tomorrow but you will know when it is right.
Of course you will grieve, I still do, but that little face looking up at me helps me through the bad times.
Good luck and best wishes

Answer 9

So very sorry to hear that. Give yourself time to grieve her and remember that the other two will also be grieving. Dont rush into getting another dog just yet. Most important dont try to replace her as you can never replace a loved pet and the new dog may end up living in her shadow with you resenting it. Wait a few months and instead put all your efforts into the others. They need you.

Answer 10

I feel for you. Its the hardest thing in the world to lose a pet, the right time to look at adopting another dog is when you and your family are ready for one.

I work at a dog rescue, it never gets any easier when they go to new homes.

You have to make sure when you get a new dog that your others dont get too left out. Just make sure you try not to make a new dog try to measure up to the one who has passed away as you would be greatly disappointed.

Good Luck

Answer 11

My sympathies on the loss of your beloved pet. I know what a hard time that is.

I think you should rescue another dog just as soon as you feel ready. If you need a little more time to grieve, by all means take that time. But please don't feel that you are being disloyal to the memory of your dog by taking in another. Cally would want you to be happy, and if a new dog will make you happy, then that's the right thing to do.

I think you can offer a rescue dog a great life, and I think it's wonderful that you plan to do that. Do so as soon as you're ready to take her in.

Best of luck to you!