I haven’t been in this situation by the way. I am a guy and happily single. But I am just curious why people have affairs if they truly loved their partner? And would you ever forgive your partner? If you say it depends on the circumstance, then what would those circumstances be? It’s just if that ever happened to me I would never be able to forgive her, under any circumstances.
2006-12-30 05:30:02 · 21 answers · asked by Hades 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
People get sick of each other. An affair is a risk, a bit of a thrill, an adventure and you're with someone new.
2006-12-30 05:33:03 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think is also because they are bored and want to feel the thrill of being with someone new. Thats why I am afraid of getting into long term relationships or even short ones. Everyone gets bored eventually and messes up and always hurts the person they said they loved the most. I could never trust anyone in the first place to not screw me over like that, but thats a more personal issue
2006-12-30 05:45:37 · answer #2 · answered by ziomy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In my first marriage I was cheated on. The first time I forgave her, because she was begging to stay with me. I didn't think it would happen again. Then a few months later it happened again. This time she left me. She told me that she cheated because I was always at work and didn't give her attention. I was angry, and believed she was 100% guilty for cheating and that I didn't need to change anything. Looking back, if I really wanted the marriage to work, maybe I should've I tried to give her that additional attention ...
In my next marriage, I was the one who cheated. I love my wife, and she's wonderful in many ways. She takes good care of me and the home. Except, she doesn't have much sex drive. And when I tried to discuss sex with her she would become defensive and angry. She thought everything was perfect I just need to deal with it.
So, I found sex elsewhere, maybe about once a week, while enjoying the benefits of having a wife who's good at everything else except sex at home. Eventually, she began to suspect I was having an affair, due to a combination of things. Maybe it was how I would disappear some evenings without answering the phone.
Then she started to listen to me. She's trying to become more sexual with me, and I really like out. However, once you start to have an affair, it's hard to stop ...
Hope I was able to answer all your questions, using my life story.
2007-01-01 19:25:43 · answer #3 · answered by Yeah Baby! 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I understand that and agree with you; But on the other hand you still never know before you've been there, so just wish it never happens.
Yes, circumstances are very important it's true.
Physical frustration: your partner is not satisfied.
someone who is selfish.
The need for comfort, revenge, oblivion, destruction, as in lost of one's marks.
Being blackmailed
Being stranded with someone on the opposite sex.
Feeling needy.
And there may well be more.
I have been married and awfully miserable, but never gave in, although it did cross my mind for revenge.
I'm glad i just chose to divorce!
But truthfully, I think your question should rather be, how do people manage not to cheat.
2006-12-30 05:43:52 · answer #4 · answered by Kc 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
because the person who is having the affair is apparently not happy in the relationship that he/she is currently in..i feel that having an affair is an easy way of getting out a relationship...i believe by simply communicating with your partner..discussing ALL concerns..thats the best way to straighten things out...there is no need to have an affair...
2006-12-30 05:38:06 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am newly married (almost 5 months). I have never had an affair, and I never intend to. I love my husband deeply and have only been sexually intimate with him. He would never have an affair either. If he did, he knows that, despite how much I love him, I cannot allow him to treat me that way. We might be able to continue to be together and regain trust but it would take a very long time of seperation.
2006-12-30 05:34:36 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
People forget how much work it takes to maintain a relationship after you have worn the shine off of it. They start to take things for granted. They get a bit bored. Then someone new shows them attention they haven't had in a while.
Gotta keep it interesting, or else someone else will do it for you.
2006-12-30 06:51:34 · answer #7 · answered by Quagmire 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
People have affairs because they are looking for something that is lacking in their relationship whether it be affection, love-making, or something else. It also could be that some people just aren't cut out for monogamy (a sign of immaturity).
2006-12-30 05:43:49 · answer #8 · answered by Flagstones925 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Relationships get stale, an affair can be exciting; some-one else finds you attractive. I agree though, if you loved your partner with all your heart, you wouldn't have an affair. And yes, it is unforgivable.
2006-12-30 06:44:02 · answer #9 · answered by F 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the reason for affairs is people get fatter and uglier as they get older. i could forgive my partner in two circumstances. 1 would be if i was having an affair myself at the same time. and 2 if my mrs was sleeping with another women and she had bigger ****
2006-12-30 05:36:32 · answer #10 · answered by kevhookway 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋