To make this as short as I can, I have 4 Beautiful neices in foster care in Ohio. They have been there for over 1 yr. and my brother and his soon to be ex-wife (in jail now) are going to loose their parental rights. I am 38 with a very small income (basically lucky I am getting by) and they want me to take all 4 girls. Currently 3 (age 2,3 & 6) are currently in a different home then the 12 year old. I could really use some input, because I am not sure if I am up to the task, this would mean moving amoung many other things. I just graduated college in 05 and have not even started a carer in my field. Please all input will help me I have until Feb 27th to figure it out.
2006-12-20 21:30:45 · 17 answers · asked by ? 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
If you have the patience for kids, then it would be in the best interest of the children to be kept them in the family. If there are other family members that can help, that would be great. If you decide to do this, and you have kids of your own, then be sure that this doesn't take away from them.
I've heard that if you register your home as a foster home, and take them in as foster kids, then the state will help you. I from Texas, so you may want to check with your state and find out what you need to do.
I'm sure they do inspections and follow-ups, so you would have to keep on your toes.
I used to work in daycare, and I've taken care of kids whose foster mom, she's single, went to work.
I think, if you love these girls, and your brother enough, that you would be willing to make the changes in your life. Your rewards will be greater that money, I'm sure.
If your brother's house is big enough, maybe you can switch houses. But I think he would have to be willing to stay away from the house. And you both would have to follow the rules, to the letter, or you could both lose the girls, and that would make it even more difficult on the girls.
Remember, this is for them. If your can't find some way to get them back together, and soon (especially the 12 yr. old), they could run into more (emotional) problems.
Once you have gotten custody of the girls, get the 12 yr old in a big sister program, or on a mentoring program. She's seen allot more than the others, and she's going to need love and guidance.
I wish you the best of luck, and i hope you decide to go through with it.
God Bless You !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2006-12-20 21:54:22 · answer #1 · answered by freakyforjesus 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
The children is what's important here. True; being under foster care is very hard on a family of children and more so with being separated from each other. However, do you honestly think there could be a true relationship between them and the parents. It sounds to me that the children really needs is a stable relationship with parents; be it foster or adoptive. but, not the birth parents because of the success rate for drug addicts. This includes having some type of control over the children thru other family members, i.e., yourself. My answer to your question is to leave rearing of the children to someone who will have total control and not have to jump in and out of the parental position every time the birth parents end up in jail or on drugs. Visit and show the love you have to the kids as much as you can, but, don't give the parents the opportunity to hurt them any more. Meaning thru you..
2006-12-20 21:50:27 · answer #2 · answered by denfasr 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Children need someone that loves them to care for them, so it depends on how you feel about them. If you are just doing it out of a sense of family obligation, you should probably let a loving family adopt them instead, if one can be found. If you really want to care for them the financial problems can probably be solved with the help of child care services. Maybe you could receive payments as a foster care provider for a year or so. It is the most decision you will make and the rewards in raising children are enormous, so you should not base your decision an a temporary lack of money. I raised children alone and had a successful Carree. It can be done.
2006-12-20 21:58:50 · answer #3 · answered by meg 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should try to help.
You can get state aid for the children seeing as though you will be their legal guardian.
That means food stamps ADC/cash assistance, and medicaid.
You can even work with a social worker to get a bigger place to live to have room for the children.
I live in a small 2 bedroom trailer with my boyfriend and my 3 yr old, if my sister needed someone to take her 2 kids, I would do it in a heartbeat.
2006-12-20 21:38:22 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was in foster care for ten years and it would have been really great if anyone in my family could have taken care of me, but it simply was not possible. I was an only child, so the separation from siblings was not an issue, but I am sure that your nieces would appreciate being together again. Is there anyway you could get your foster care license so you could receive a stipend for their care?
2006-12-23 00:44:43 · answer #5 · answered by wisegirl1204 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hard times, try to buy some more time u need to get a careeer goin then maybe u can take all the girls in, @ the mo, maybe just 1 at a time or tech them to take care of each other, i ised to stay at home bymyself from about 8y'o n i use to fry chips n stuffs, kids gota learn, but get some money 1st u need that to support its beeter them livein in a foster home if u got no money but waa if they turn out like foster kids,
@wrk so gota go
2006-12-20 21:35:46 · answer #6 · answered by Mr Trend Vampire 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you feel you can handle this, then do it. You may have to move into a bigger apartment. As far as income, usually you will get some sort of aid for the children to help care for them.
You may have to go to the library to do further research and go to your local courts or children welfare agency to know your rights as a relative. Good Luck!
2006-12-20 21:40:18 · answer #7 · answered by Vivian 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Taking on 4 children will wear you out. You will need help. If you decide to take them, you need to do so while living with your parents so that they can help. In fact, your parents are used to raising children, so they would be a better pair to take care of the children.
2006-12-21 09:05:06 · answer #8 · answered by adamsjrcn 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You reallyneed mothers to help you out here. Move your question to the pregnancy bit on Yahoo Answers.
It's a tough question you ask. If you are going to struggle bringing up your nieces, it would be unfair to them and to yourself to take them on. If you can handle 3 youngsters and you'd get by, then go for it. At times you may look back and think "I gave up my career for these children and look how ungrateful they are" but try always to remember, they didn't ask you to.
2006-12-20 21:43:05 · answer #9 · answered by 2dog 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you can apply an become a foster parent and receive an income and the 12 year old can help they need you
2006-12-20 21:41:44 · answer #10 · answered by Tina Tegarden 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋