Help??why is his behavoiur like this..anyone faced it??
my husband never visited my parents and siblings in these 10years of my marraige..he's more interested to keep his parents and siblings happy..he never did anything to hurt me..but i feel bad due to this behaviour of his..i know he loves me..why then he behaves like that???
2006-12-20 21:18:03 · 3 answers · asked by talla 2 in Health ➔ Mental Health
He is selfish and thoughtless to you. They wonder too, and he isn't giving any reason for it...It is okay to be loyal to your own family, but to completely ignore your family is just plain mean. He probably would go if you insisted, but have you asked him yourself? Have they insulted him at all? Does he feel intimidated for whatever reason by them? I would tell him it is time for you to be able to go see them and you want him to have a relationship or at least accompany you when you go...or he better have a good reason to explain why.
2006-12-20 22:47:28 · answer #1 · answered by MotherKittyKat 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
For a good healthy relationship,there should be some understanding & some sacrifices to be made,Teach ur husband
Knowing & Understanding: There's A Difference
Swami Sukhabodhananda
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A man with eight PhDs - he was proud of his achievement - met a monk. The monk asked him, "Why have you been so foolish in life?" The man said: "But I have eight PhDs!"
"I have understood you; it is foolish to spend the best part of life reading instead of enjoying the birds, stars and the moon", said the monk.
"You may have knowledge but not clarity; you may know a lot and yet understand nothing".
What does one have to understand about life?
You have many centres: Intellectual centre, an emotional centre and a body centre. In each centre, there is a mechanical and magnetic part. The mechanical part acts like a machine while the magnetic part acts with ore awareness.
You have to transform yourself. Your mechanical movements and thinking have to change. Your mechanical emotions like jea- lousy and hatred have to be overcome. You can do this by bringing in more awareness.
Then a complete being will emerge. When you increase awareness, even poison can turn into medicine; and with no awareness, medicine can become poison.
Why are we so mechanical?
A king dreamt that he was a beggar. His guru, in his dreams, told him the truth that he was a king and not a beggar. Now was he to argue with his guru or just wake up?
The question of "why" cannot be answered. When did time begin? You cannot answer such a question. Which came first, egg or hen? There is a logical fallacy in the very question. Realise that we are mechanical. Bring in more awareness and see the life-transformation.
Even inert objects have life. Treat any object with loving awareness and it will guide you mysteriously. Your intuition and purity have to increase to receive this message. When you bathe, lovingly talk to water.
In a relationship, is it not necessary to judge? >>
In a relationship, is it not necessary to judge?
Keep yourself relaxed. Increase your awareness and love. Not to judge should not be a conclusion. Don't make it a demand or compulsion. Let there be a choice. There is a difference between "should' and "choice'.
"Should' creates stress; it limits you to only one option. Choose not to judge. It is not a demand but a wise choice.
The danger of judgment is that you stop seeing the object of judgment and you are more in your judgment.
In life, you have to make judgments, but don't be a victim of your judgments. Suppose a thief enters your house, you have to judge him but then, be open to the possibility that he could change.
Suppose you meet him after 10 years, see if he has changed or not. Do you still judge from the memory that he has been a thief? If you do not have this awareness, you will not see the change in a person even if he has changed.
What should one be really aware of?
Negative emotions poison. Like avoiding poisonous food, avoid negative emotions. Don't identify with them. Don't participate in them. Choose to create a new will, not be driven by negative emotions.
They deplete your energy. They keep you asleep. They are harmful and heavy. They make your life complicated. For example somebody's success should not be your failure. We define our failure by somebody's success.
We feel jealous seeing someone successful. Jealousy is a great poison.
Compete with your potential. Even if you compete with others, enjoy it. See beauty all around. Do not define your success and failure by someone's success and failure.
2006-12-21 05:52:53 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i have seen many people facing this problem.. its natural to see gents in this way dont worry.. anyways he loves u na
2006-12-21 05:21:47 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋