Do you have any jokes??????????

Question

Do you have any jokes??????????

Answer 1

ok this is from family guy tv show

this episode where a serial killer came to the house and brought his wife

the guy went to prison for killing a bunch of masturbators
he was traumatized since he was a child and walked in on his mother and jackie gleason and jackie was saying : POW RIGHT IN THE KISSER! POW RIGHT IN THE KISSER! POW RIGHT IN THE KISSER!
so he started killing masturbators and fat people

he comes to the house with his "wife"
there is no one there and the dog says : there's no one there
and he says : this is my wife
and he has his arm over the shoulder of nothing
he sits down on the couch and his "wife" sits next to him
and the baby comes and sits on the couch next to him
and the man says "move over your sitting on my wife"
and then the baby moves over and its the baby an empty space and the serial killer
then the dog comes back and finds out whats going on and the man leaves
then the baby leaves and goes in the kitchen and gets a cucumber
and comes back and puts the cucumber in the empty space
then its him the space and the dog on the couch
then the baby says : when he gets back do you think he will mind that i put the cucumber in his wife?
then the dog takes a second to get it...then they both bust out laughing

that was hi-freakin-larious

Answer 2

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead have a breast stroke swimming competition. (100meters) After a minute the brunette finishes first and the redhead soon follow. Three hour later the blonde finishes and says, "Thats not fair, they used their arms"

Answer 3

haha good well i acquired a intercourse comic story for you wish you find it irresistible :) on listening to that her grandad had simply died kate went and visited her nan to relief her whilst she requested how he died her nan replyed by means of sayin that he had had a middle assault even as makin love two her kate stated that it used to be foolish that two ancient men and women wherein havin intercourse because it used to be askin for challenge her nan replyed by means of sayin that they used to do it to the sluggish speed of the church bells because it used to be simply the correct pace she then wiped a tear from her eye and carryed on by means of sayin''if that dahmed ice cream van hadnt come alongside he could nonetheless be alive at present'' :) xxx

Answer 4

A bigger joke is me

Answer 5

Why do blind people never go skydiving?



Because it scares the C**p out of the dog

Justin

Answer 6

When the Iraq war broke out, it was just at Spring Break. I was talking with a Time/Life photographer online whose name was Susanna Mitchel. I told her I had the time off. She said that with the war on, she had no assistants so Time/Life had authorized her to "get" anyone and they could fly to Kuwait City first class with her to do a three day assignment. I initially declined, saying I didn't want to get killed. She said it was a fluff piece...we'd go to Alharama, a border town, and never be out of sight of Kuwait, and there would be more soldiers there than Iraqis. So, I caught a red eye, met Susanna at JFK, and we flew to Kuwait and went to Alharama and took photos of them handing out wet wipes and toothbrushes. For three days I carried film and lenses in one bag and MREs and Perrier in the other. Getting back on the plane to come home, I requested a cup of Joe..having not had any and needing a coffee fix....well, it was lousy airline coffee and on the first bump, it scalded my knee badly.

Meanwhile, back at JFK, the Barney Fife of Homeland security would not let me back in my own country. We were coming from a war zone and I was listed on Susanne's State Dept. papers only as " assistant" since they didn't know who it would be. She and him got into it big time right there and then she began to sob. It was then that I said,

OH Susanna, don't you cry for me. I come from Al Harama, with Bad Joe on my knee.

Answer 7

wait, let me look at my BOOKS......................

why did the chicken didnot crossed the road??
because it was chicken's day off!!

Answer 8

sometimes

Answer 9

no