(im 14) My little brother (4) gets all the attention, and also my big sister (17) where ever we are. Do I even exist? Should I start calling myself invisible? they just baby him up all in front of me, and I get nothing. I try to talk, but nooo they must not want to hear what I have to say. and when i do try to maybe..just maybe get attention from my mom, she lectures me about stuff...
I dont have any friends, just family...and lately i feel like ive been very neglected socially, like really lonely, and its torchure. I also feel weird, like maybe they dont wanna talk to me cuz something is wrong with me?
...and why is the world so cold? I feel like i only have myself, and thats not enough. My social meter is completely empty, and I feel like I could explode or something
2006-12-20 16:52:38 · 14 answers · asked by Kj 3 in Health ➔ Mental Health
I'd say you were suffering for a couple of dynamics here, honey. First of all, you're hormones are raging. You're not and adult; you're not a child. Second, you are a "second child" and alot of second children feel the way you do. Sit down, one-on-one with your mom or your dad; or even a grandparent or trusted friend and bring a copy of this question. Tell them you're really having a tough time and need some direction. Tell your parents that you're experiencing a lot of anxiety. They need to know these things. Afterall, they are just parents...and you didn't come with a set of instructions, right? Give them an opportunity to help you or find you some help. Learn to trust them. Let them know you love them and need their attention at times also. I'd also ask you to get involved with a youth group and make some wholesome new friends. There are lots of groups in churches, or other places for socially unskillful young people. This is how you learn to deal with society, by actually be a part of it. Then find yourself somewhere you can be fulfilled. Like volunteering in a childrens cancer ward; or reading to blind folks, or going to visit the elderly. Giving of yourself will help with your self-esteem when you find out how much you mean to needy people who have absolutely no one, or who have life-threatening diseases. There are also youth-oriented programs with the police department and the armed services. You just need some time to grow, and someone to give you some direction. What you are feeling is totally normal. Now go talk to your parents. They love you and would want to know how you're feeling so they can help you. Godloveya, kid-o....you can do this and be a blessing to someone else. Thanks for sharing your deepest feelings and blessed holidays.
2006-12-20 18:53:57 · answer #1 · answered by Sassy OLD Broad 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First you should tell your parents how you feel, second sit down and pray about your situation . Remember that some children out there don't even have a family, some children are getting physically abused, some children are in hospitals dying from something awful. Just remember that your situation is not that bad. Just be thankful for everything you do have and in do time things will get better if you just take the time out to pray. Hope you feel better!
2006-12-20 17:14:42 · answer #2 · answered by HOOD RAT 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Number 1. You're 14, and this is part of the 'teen' years.
Number 2. Have you tried telling your parents--when they're calm and not so busy, how you feel?
Number 3 . Listen: Friends don't always come to you. You have to put yourself out there, be friendly, and be willing to be vunerable. It's not all about "us". Other people have wants and worries, too. You have to remember, that you're not the only one.
2006-12-20 17:00:54 · answer #3 · answered by Mona 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
don't be so hard on yourself man, you need to join a few clubs. Actually I joined a chess club, and it's pretty cool. Also, get more involved in sports. Ever think they favor the others because they truly feel that your going to be the smartes of em all?? they may actually see you as very independent. The world is cold cause of money and greed and power but you just be happy, and content with a job someday, let all the phonies search for happiness
merry x mas
2006-12-20 17:00:41 · answer #4 · answered by godzillasagoodman 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Call up a social services agency that helps elderly people. Ask to become a phone friend to someone who is elderly, to talk. You can be there for that person, maybe just checking in once a day to make sure they haven't fallen, or you can talk to them longer. If you get paired up with the right person, it's like having a grandmother or grandfather who will listen to you, and you also listen to them, and you have someone who cares. You won't be lonely anymore, and they won't be lonely either, and you can learn a lot from them. Sometimes they'll help you with homework questions, too, like, "What was the world like in the 1950's" or "what is the one piece of technology that has changed your life."
If you don't like that advice, you can also sign up with Big Brothers/Big Sisters, and you can find someone who will be an older friend and mentor and help you a lot, and you won't be lonely anymore.
Good luck!
2006-12-20 16:58:55 · answer #5 · answered by Katherine W 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
My friend....hang in there. I'm sure it is not easy being the middle child. I know you may not understand this, but sit down with your mom and tell her that you know how busy and concerned about your siblings want and need, but that you feel kind of left out. OK? DO it! You have nothing to lose. They might make up excuses of why, but at least you gave it a shot, and now it will be on their minds. OK? I know what it is like to be alone. Trust me. If you need a friend, keep posting....I am jmhere23@yahoo.com
No, I am not a pervert or anything of the sort, but i know what it like to feel alone....especialy at your age. I was adopted into a family with 2 girls of their own, and I never fit in. So I know how it feels. You actually have it lucky in your own way. So look at the bright sides...OK? Merry Christmas.
2006-12-20 17:08:14 · answer #6 · answered by pofdog 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't feel bad, a lot of people feel that way. I'm sure your're a good kid and you'll make friends. You might make friends in school or work. I joined an organization called soka gakkai and we get together sometimes and chant together. It's a buddhist organization that believes in peace, culture and education.
http://www.sgi.org
2006-12-20 17:02:25 · answer #7 · answered by Sid S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Over the last five years I had begun to have increasingly withdraw into a downward spiral of depression..
But now with the method I can fully focus my energy and thoughts into a decisive line on how to make my life better constantly. And it works like magic! I'm beginning to attract people to me once again and things have just been looking up since then.
Helping you eliminate depression?
2016-05-16 02:26:14 · answer #8 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've felt that way, and honestly, all you can do is make an effort to make more friends. Just be nice to people whenever you can, not fake nice, but genuinly. You'll meet nice people that way. It takes time, but if you don't try you can't complain. Good luck.
2006-12-20 16:56:53 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its going to be ok. I was a middle child with extreme age differences just like you. My brother was born when I was 9 and my sister is 5 years older than me. It can get pretty lonely. You have to do things for yourself. I used to do alot of reading. I had friends but only a few close ones. I also ran and went for walks alot, by myself, just to fill time and exercise always makes you feel better because it releases endorphins that make you happy. There is nothing wrong with doing things alone. It actually helps you know yourself better. You should also always remember that you are only 14 right now. You have so much living ahead of you! Life is even more enjoyable when you know yourself and you can make yourself happy and not depend on other people to do it for you. I promise, It gets better!
2006-12-20 17:06:46 · answer #10 · answered by queenbuck79 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋