Advice on being bipolar and relationship troubles!?

Question

Okay,I recently went back on meds for bipolarII.For the last 6 months my fiance and I have been pretty much fighting nonstop.We also had a baby six months ago and I was dealing with post partum depression.Him and I have been together for over 2 years now,but I think he has come to the end of his ability to deal with me.I would of gone back on meds sooner,but had no medical coverage.About 3 weeks ago I went all out and we got into a huge argument.No fighting but a lot of yelling.The thing is I can't really remember any of it,and I wasn't drunk or anything.Since I got back on meds things have been better,no arguments or anything,and I am finally beginning to enjoy life again.But he is still in the frame of mind that things aren't going to change and he can't get over the argument we had.He thinks maybe after I deal with "all of this" we can work things out,but until then he thinks we need a break.Yet he still tells me he loves me and wants to kiss and hold me everyday.No idea what to do!

We had been trying to go to couples counseling before I got back on meds, but that guy thought I was fine and the bipolar stuff was all in my head, so I never really wanted to go to our sessions. And I will be staying on meds as my trust fund just became effective so I have the money for it even w/o insurance.

I am on wellbutrin sr 100(made me sick when he tried a higher dose so we are working up to it) and he is looking into lithium, but I don't want to have to constantly monitor my blood. I am also on Abilify for right now(wb is causing me to not sleep well and I don't want to have access to a full bottle of sleeping pills, so he gave me a week supply of these.)

Answer 1

You should get counseling together so he can get some insight into your illness. And you really need to figure out a way to make sure you can always get your meds, because you know you need them. If you can't afford counseling, try to see a pastor/minister. Tell him you love him and for the baby's sake you want him to stay and work it out, that your baby needs a father.

Answer 2

You're problems will be easier to deal with as long as you stay on your medications. Bipolar disorder is hard enough to deal with without taking away the one thing that can actually help you...the meds. If you ever find yourself without help, go to your county mental health department so they can help you. You don't realize how others suffer for your behavior. You'll have to earn your mans trust again. It's a difficult thing to live with. So the best thing you can do is take care of yourself and educate your family on the disorder. When they tell you that you're being unreasonable, believe them. You have to trust somebody. Everyone I've ever known dealing with a bi-polar loved one has had a difficult time. It's hard on your family. Godloveya.

Answer 3

First, I'm sorry you have to go through this. Second Good for you and way to go, you have no idea how many people give up trying to fight bipolar and other forms of depression. Next Please tell him that you are dealing with "all of this" by taking your medication and being willing to fight to keep your relationship with him. Try to explain to him the very best way you know how what Bipolar is all about so he understands it isn't something that can be addressed and then goes away. After that, if he doesn't quite understand please make an appointment with a psychiatrist or counselor for both of you so they can fill in any "blanks" or answer any questions he (or you) may have that aren't answered yet. Please check this web site for some very good information on Bi Polar. http://www.nvo.com/psych_help/bipolarmooddisorder/
You are a very brave and strong person and I wish you well.

Answer 4

OK young lady, first things first. What meds are you on? I think you as well as him need to learn alot more about this disorder. I am bipolar along with a few other things & in my opinion, education is the key to managing this disorder. The biggest thing I have found is often times I just need a little space & stress is very hard on me. I hope I helped in some way.

Answer 5

Try having your doctor speak to your fiance. I know it's not the same dynamic, but I was having a lot of problems with my mother until she spoke to my doctor (I suffer from panic disorder and see a psychiatrist). She is much better around me now.

If both of you are determined to make your relationship work, you might also consider couples' therapy.

Hope things get better for you soon.

Answer 6

hang in there!!! i dated a girl for about two years who was diagnosed with bipolar. i will admit there were times when i thought i would just die of frustration.....for people who don't truly know what it's like, we have a hard time understanding the ups and the downs. fortunately for me and her, i work for a state mental health center. i had more patience and understanding....which i think had a lot to do with how well we did get along. here's the thing though....because of your diagnosis automatically you two are going to have some sort of communication problems/understanding each other problems....b/c a lot of times you are perceiving things differently and you cope differently. i think our saving grace in this area was sitting down and talking specifically about this on a regular basis. i am not saying that you need to talk specifically about bipolar...sometimes its best if you don't make it the center of your life by constantly bringing it up or using it as an excuse. what i am saying is, during times when you feel that you have misunderstood each other or there appears to be some sort of problem directly related to your disorder, you should sit down and directly discuss it. otherwise, you give time for anger and resentment to build, and room for misunderstanding to infest itself further. when sometimes you could just nip it in the bud.

here's a mental note for you to remember as well: just as i would strongly suggest for your boyfriend to take your diagnosis into consideration, i urge you to also try to understand that he doesn't really know what it's like to be you or someone like you.

maybe you can help him get some education on bipolar/support group for spouses, etc . or maybe the two of you should consider joint counseling.

hopefully you two will pick up and move on. remember that even though you seem to have moved on and gotten back on track, you may have said or done something very hurtful to him that he can't seem to forget. this will take time and further understanding. you two can do it...just hang in there!! best wishes.

Answer 7

Are you going to take the suggestion which you're soliciting for? This guy sounds risky even without understanding all the info. i think of you're making up excuses on why you ought to stay with him and not possibly seem on the real image. you're saying you will sense undesirable without him, yet you're additionally feeling undesirable with him. how are you going to ever locate somebody who will manage you the way you deserve in case you reside with this guy? i think of its greater which you're feeling sorry for him now through fact he has this condition and you sense which you ought to stay with him to paintings it out. He does not seem to have any admire for you, so why stay with him? Do you think of you will no longer be able to probable love every person back after this guy? nicely i think of you which you would be able to. Are you prepared to stay with this guy who does not love you or admire you in basic terms so which you will no longer sense lonely? if so, that announces lots approximately how lots your admire your self. i think of you ought to pass away now at the same time as the abuse is basically verbal. despite you verify to do, please be careful.

Answer 8

Why are women on so many prescription medications? That's the main reason I don't have a girlfriend and can't hold one for more than 4 months at a time.