Well, my girlfriend is mad at me because I had spent a litle bit of money on a gift for her, it was only about 3 dollars, but she flared up about how strapped for cash I am and that I shouldn't have done it, now she won't even speak to me. What's worse is that recently I've been making alot of changes for her, an yet she acts like I'm the same as always. What shoud I do? We've been together for almost 3 years, just so you know.
2006-12-20 14:38:53 · 15 answers · asked by Annonymous 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Well in regards to the financial situation, I do understand why she may have had a slight problem with that, I personally think that she may be reacting a little too hard towards it but it is a reasonable reason. It would be because she is just simply concerned about you, and she has your best interest at heart in which she believes you could have saved that "needed" money for yourself no matter how little the amount was. And with the changes you have made, she could be treating you the same because she still sees the same person, or she doesn't like the person you are changing into... Good luck, hope it helps...
2006-12-20 14:46:25 · answer #1 · answered by Phoenix 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's definitely over reacting. Yes you're strapped for cash, but you made that gesture because you care about her. She should NOT throw it back in your face like that! TRY to step back and look at the situation. From the outside looking in, a reasonable reaction would have been to say something like;
"Honey! You shouldn't have spent money on me! You didn't have to do that. I know you're really tight right now. Thank you for the gift. I appreciate it very much. Just don't feel like you have to spend money on me to make me feel special. You make me feel special every day."
An INAPPROPRIATE and CONTROLLING reaction would be to get mad and stop speaking to you. Don't do guilt over this. This is HER problem, not yours!
2006-12-20 14:42:03 · answer #2 · answered by Lisa E 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This girl is looking at the future and wants a man who is responsible about money and most notably sucsessful. This is her reasoning and her pathetic excuse. Take it from me and I will not spare tin tacks. This girl does not even have the love and respect for you to appreciate that thought you are skint, you buy her a present. Any normal girl would be complimented and overjoyed to have a boyfriend like you who would do this when you are financially broke. She could have at least appreciated the gesture. Even if she deemed it stupid. But she condemmed you without even an iota for your obvious love and respect of her.
You are obviously a decent human being. You deserve better. Take my advise, a person like that who doen't appreciate anything, especially so coldly, should not be part of your life. I am going to give you one of the hardest pieces of advise you will ever get. DUMP HER AND DUMP HER NOW.
You are young, most likely, and you have a whole life ahead of you. A life not to be wasted and squandered on the likes of this. And time is a finite thing. Do not waste your life. There are plenty of girls out there. Legions of them who would appreciate someone like you. Going with this girl was a bad mistake. Put her where all bad mistakes belong. Down the gurgler of history.
You deserve better, much better. Be decent and fair to youself. You really have nothing to loose. You have a world to win. Go win it and win it NOW. For this person will throw everything you do for her back in your face. Let it not happen. Free youself. And good luck.
2006-12-20 14:54:28 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depending on the reason for the gift or just because gift,you can always tell her it you had put a little extra change back over a period of time or it was on sale.
I too am strapped for cash a lot lately,but I still try to get my wife something on special occasions(even if I have to hide money from her).
2006-12-20 14:47:51 · answer #4 · answered by Ralph T 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Read her the riot act and/or get rid of her and find someone new who appreciates you.
She's being very controlling and $3 is NOTHING--unless you have absolutely no food in the refrigerator or your heat is about to be shut off. Then she'd have a right to question your judgement.
But, under the circumstances you've described, the real problem is that she's just mad bc you didn't "mind" her. That makes her real bad news and real out of bounds/out of control for trying to control you and then punish you when you don't "cooperate" (i.e., you don't see, do things her way, think the way she wants you to think, behave the way she wants....) This makes you a child, one who's too big to put in a corner or take over her knee.
P.S.--It's very tellling that you say you've been "making lots of changes for her". Sounds like she dictated those to you too. Hope, at the very least, that you really profited by such changes (e.g., stopped smoking) vs. making yourself over just to be acceptable to her (or her friends and family), trying to keep her, or to just get her approval.
After 3 years, aren't you tired of her yet? I'm sure you can do better.
2006-12-20 14:49:04 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take the gift back and get a refund, then open a savings account at a bank and wrap up the savings account book.
2006-12-20 14:43:18 · answer #6 · answered by puppets48744 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dump her you dont need her to run your money considering it was only 3 buck man come on it not how much but the thought that counts in a gift.
2006-12-20 14:40:59 · answer #7 · answered by c_kaper@yahoo.com 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i'ld say have you both talked? have you both solved your money issue yet? perhaps she wants the money issue solved first before you get her stuff... you just gotta talk it out with her. and reshuffle your priorities :) but it takes two hands to clap, so tell her that too... if she loves you, she'll try harder and likely change... go have a long talk and patch your fraying bond back... gd luck :D
2006-12-20 14:51:35 · answer #8 · answered by wat_more_can_i_say? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you dont give any importence of that issue....silent for a while and see her reaction.... silent ...passion and compromise is the best way to tacle any difficult situation...best wishes for coming new year
2006-12-20 15:36:45 · answer #9 · answered by shuvadip d 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u r okay. u didnt do anything wrong,
talk to her, tell her its all for her, and that money doesnt mean anything to u as long as u have her beside u.
and try to convince her to stop overacting
2006-12-20 14:42:03 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋