Do any of you have issues with your spouse/boyfriend regarding your faith. What do you do about the conflict arising from teaching your children about your faith?
2006-12-20 09:23:51 · 13 answers · asked by Tink 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
I have offered to teach them both and let them decide later but he wants it his way. He thinks my way is wrong but he has no real faith. I know this makes us a little incompatible but I love him and want it to work.
2006-12-20 09:32:05 · update #1
Have you check out the parenting section on the Witches' Voice before? http://www.witchvox.com/_x.html?c=parent
I would think that the Pagan parent's tolerance could be easily overrun if the other parent's religion promote intolerance and claims that it is the "only true" path. This could cause some major conflict.
2006-12-20 09:27:50 · answer #1 · answered by Mrs. Pears 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't stay with that person. Anyone who does not respect your faith does not respect you and without respect, there is no real love, only possession. Anyone who encourages violating the free will of a child through indocrtrination is in direct oposition to the tenets of most Pagan faiths and therefore not worth breeding with.
My ex has never been involved with my daughter. We broke up while I was still pregnant, but years later he decided he wanted to see her. After only being alone with him for a few houres, she's never gone back, and won't. She came back very upset about being told this and that are Not Real (Nothing is not real, nothing can be disproved, so how can it be not real? Proving NOT is impossible.) and that we were all going to go to hell. Old fool. Anyway, she wasn't so much traumatized into thinking I was wrong as bound and determined never to be left alone with those horrible people again. But either could have happened. When a child gets that kind of lecturing, someone is going to end up being hated. Who will it be, you or your mate?
She has never been told what to believe. Instead she is instructed and choses on her own. That is the responsible way to raise children. Intolerance is not a value you want instilled into your children.
My life partner is an atheist. He agrees that children should be educated about as many different cultures and beliefs as possible and chose (or better yet form) their own religious paradigm. It took me a long time to find and settle on him. I wouldn't trade him for all the "love" in the world (though I do love him). You have to think about what's best for your kids, present and future, and choose a mate based on that, not on chemically induced emotions.
2006-12-21 10:00:47 · answer #2 · answered by kaplah 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You both really need to talk about it....seriously.
I have seen this many times before. Teaching children both is an option. It sounds like a cop out, but ultimately it's the child's choice. Providing information on other faiths when the time is right can help and teach.
My son is 3 and we are pagans, so it's not us with the issues, it's my boyfriend's mom. She is LDS and rather worried that her grand baby is going to hell.
I listed a link to a pagan parent forum below. Check it out if you get the time.
2006-12-20 18:05:27 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
As a parent/grandparent who happens to be pagan, I have exposed my children to as many faiths as possible in order to give them the most information they can have to make an informed decision for themselves. I believe this is the responsibility of all parents to do (with us present to insure they receive information and not indoctrination).
My daughter is also raising her children the same way.
I believe this is the proper way to parent a child. The choice is ultimately theirs to make.
Paganism allows for this where other religious tenets may not. I've actually witnessed a christian preacher's wife lock her 3 year old in a closet and tell her that this is what hell would be like and kept her there until she "got saved"..of course, this is an extreme example but it is the belief of many whose religious leaders/books tell them that theirs is the only way to "eternal life" that they MUST save their children from damnation; and they indoctrinate their children with their "Truth" early in life. This can be damaging to a child's psyche, and cause them emotional and mental problems later on in life.
I've not had problems with my partner in this arena. Our beliefs are different, but we agree that children should make their own decisions in their own time, when they are ready and capable of doing so.
2006-12-20 18:23:20 · answer #4 · answered by Kallan 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think anyone should "Teach" their children any religion... I think they should wait until the child is old enough, and have them read books on EVERY faith and choose themselves. Beliefs are personal, not just what your mother or father told you to believe. Think about it.
2006-12-20 17:28:05 · answer #5 · answered by Ophelia 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Teach that faith is a personal choice and leave it up to them to ask questions, answer as truthfully as possible but always remind them that your answers are not the only answers and that there are other beliefs and answers that are equally valid.
2006-12-20 17:35:58 · answer #6 · answered by greg.gourdian 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you ar a family that has2 different faiths, teach the children both, and let them decide which to follow when they are old enough to understand.
2006-12-20 17:27:56 · answer #7 · answered by judy_r8 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
My husband and I are both Pagans, i think we whould have some serious issues if one of us was christian and the other Pagan. Im also an ex christian. As you can see from the poster above christianity breeds hatred.
2006-12-20 17:28:18 · answer #8 · answered by badferret 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
religion is the choice of the individual not the choice of the parents let them know both concepts and decide for themselves without being pushed
2006-12-20 17:33:29 · answer #9 · answered by harro_06 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Pagan from Pagani means field workers. Sure why not. My uncle is a farmer, my cousins turned out just fine.
2006-12-20 17:26:11 · answer #10 · answered by Jimfix 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋