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Over the last couple of years I must have dated around 10 girls and with most of them finished after a couple of dates or weeks. It probably doesn't help that I'm quite shy generally and maybe a bit inexperienced but I'd appreciate tips successful dating early on and what are the best 'dos and don'ts'. What advice do you have girls? What about appearance, chat, places to go, off putting traits or whatever you think?

2006-12-20 07:59:29 · 17 answers · asked by micktravis 1 in Family & Relationships Singles & Dating

17 answers

Treat them like crap. Women are screwed up in the head, so if you treat them like crap, they will do everything they can to please you. Try it. It works.

2006-12-20 08:02:19 · answer #1 · answered by Sax M 6 · 1 2

The two date barrier is a tough one to break. If a girl goes out with you on a third date, she must think you have serious long term potential. It's not that uncommon to have a lot of "two and out situations". That being said, here is what helped me out in the past:

1. Don't think the girl you just started to date as the end all be all. Look at her as a potential opportunity, you have everything to gain nothing to lose.

2. Do not come needy and desperate. If you call her once, let her return your call.

3. Keep the conversations focused on getting to know HER.

4. If you don't think you can at least kiss her by date 3, you probably won't get a third date.

5. Keep it going very slow on the first two dates, the key is to leave her wanting more time with you.

Best of luck.

2006-12-20 08:06:27 · answer #2 · answered by tannedknight45 5 · 0 0

There's a lesson in this.
If after 10 girls you remain a "two-date wonder" (I like the way you put it), then you are not learning from experience.
Maybe you are young and a novice at dating (we all were once upon a time), but you do need to do a bit of serious thinking about yourself. Ask yourself some questions:

Am I behaving the way girls would expect me to behave?
Am I making it obvious that I like confidence?
Do I talk more and listen less? Do I need to reverse this?
Could I be a boring conversationalist? Can I sustain a conversation on any subject (need not be lofty, could even be in the nature of idle gossip)?
Am I being over-considerate about her needs and wants (I am not talking sex here, but things like being too eager to open doors, etc.)
Do girls see me as a "friend" but no more?
Do girls think I am gay? Am I inadvertently giving this (wrong) impression?

Think about these questions, and make others for yourself, and analyse them. Talk to a trusted male friend who is more successful with girls than you are, and get him to give tips on how you can change the "signals" you send out.

Above all, don't be over anxious. Give yourself time, but learn from every experience. You'll be alright.

2006-12-20 12:31:37 · answer #3 · answered by wisdom tooth 3 · 0 0

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2016-05-01 16:22:27 · answer #4 · answered by ? 3 · 0 0

I've read the answers and I think it's a combination of most of them. But my advice is instead of "dating" do a cookery course or join a club/gym. Become a girls friend and if things blossom great and if not then I bet she has a friend that would love to go out with you. Dating is such a game. It's really tough, try not to be too eager, don't hold back, kiss her, don't kiss her, call her, don't call her - it just makes it all so false. Make a friend. That's what I'd like anyway. But after spending what you would consider 2-3-4 "dates" with your new "friend" either make a move or make the decision to just be her friend.

2006-12-20 08:30:11 · answer #5 · answered by Curious 1 · 0 0

Confidence is a big thing for me. It's something I associate with being a man....being strong and confident. It's not your fault that you are shy. I've gotten a lot better than I used to be, but I used to be really shy myself. I know it's not something you can just switch off when necessary. There are ways to work on shyness so, I would recommend looking into that. You can show interest, but I would also say not to let a girl know that you are too into her too early on. She needs to know that you have other options, so she can feel that she really has something when she gets you. Umm...what else? Appearance wise...of course always practice good hygiene and dress appropriately according to the occasion. Women are used to going to the normal spots for first dates....you know like the movies, out to dinner, etc. You can catch her off guard if you put more thought into it. It don't have to be expensive date, either. You can take her to the beach one day...or go to a nice park and feed ducks...ice skating....something a little different from the norm.

2006-12-20 08:10:49 · answer #6 · answered by angie20k 4 · 0 0

First off, you can't afford to be too shy. If the girl has to pry conversation out you, she might figure it's too much work. Also, smile more and look her in the eye instead of glancing away as you talk. She needs to know you are genuine and not hiding something. Thats hard to do if you're too shy to communicate.

Sounds to me like you need to gain some self esteem... perahps some minor counseling?

2006-12-20 08:59:29 · answer #7 · answered by westfield47130 6 · 0 0

well im proud of you to actually admit that as i thought i was the only one. firstly you should never change yourself to make yourself better if dates are not working out for you its because your dating the wrong women, dont look for types go for a girl who you believe is going to be your match does not mater if she has red hair or brown eyes, try it go on a date with someone you have never experienced before someone not your "type"and i garentee that you will be more confident and will able to have a decent conversation...it workes for me and i date men that are not pretty dudes and they are much more funner and have more personality

2006-12-20 08:04:02 · answer #8 · answered by xxDiStUrBeDxx 4 · 0 0

Be yourself ...
Be Honest
Be true
Be romantic
Be thoughtful
Be caring
Be imaginative


The right person will like you for whoever you are

Good luck and dont try too hard thats sometimes off putting

2006-12-20 08:02:59 · answer #9 · answered by Byte 4 · 0 0

basic. like let her do all the talking . coffe places are nice. dont be cheap. or if she likes tea.if you get as far as the third or fourth date bring flowers. dont show your shy girls like it when the guy is in control.
if you need more advice im me i can help

2006-12-20 08:04:39 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

pay her lots of compliments, take her to a nice place (pref not mcdonalds if you can help it!), smile, maintain eye contact, remember to wash before your date, don't wear too much cologne, nice to bring a bunch of flowers as well. be yourself.
if you get shy or self conscious ask if she would like anything else from the menu etc
good luck and be nice

2006-12-20 08:03:35 · answer #11 · answered by Chintot 4 · 1 1

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