2006-12-20 07:51:19 · 17 answers · asked by klyve88 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
It doesn't work.
2006-12-20 07:55:51 · answer #1 · answered by Sax M 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It works.
Despite what anyone else tells you here, long distance affairs are like any other relationship. There are areas where you have to work harder than a "normal relation" and there things that you need not. The critical aspect that you should realize it that you have to put in a lot more effort to bridge the distance.
Communication is the biggest challenge - nothing would match a direct face-to-face conversation. Your SMS', IM chats, emails, telephonic talks would always leave much to the other person's interpretation. It would not convey emotions and feelings that way a face-to-face would. So, you would have to trust the other person and you may have to give them the benefit-of-doubt a lot more often than what you would in a "normal" relation.
At least one of you (ideally both) would have to make that extra effort to keep the realtionship alive.
Make regular plans to get together and meet in person. It could be 6 months from now or a year. This helps a lot as both of you would have something to wait for. Moreover, the period immediately before and after you meet would also give you both enough topics of conversation.
Do stuff together. Say, play a game of online pool /scrabble or play some word game on IM or sing a song together on phone etc.
Share your plans for the future and discuss where both your plans meet. It could be career related, personal or whatever. This would also help understand eachother better.
Most importantly, have a clear goal / dead line on your expectation from the relationship. It could be something like, "we will get married in 2 years time", "I will shift to her city by June", "We will talk to our parents in 6 months", whatever it is that BOTH of you are comfortable with.
Be EXTRA patient with each other and always try to look from the other persons perspective. "Am I asking for too much?", "(S)he is with friends watching a movie and forgot to call back. Should I get angry and make him /her feel worse than what they already are?" Are some questions you should keep asking yourself.
I could list out all the problems with long distance relationships as well. But you are not here making a business transaction where you'd look at costs and benefits and decide. It is a relation that you intend build and nurture.
Think about it this way, what if you have to stay away from the person you are committed to / married to because of his / your career? The situation you are in is exactly the same. So, go whole heartedly and be prepared for all the ups and downs of the relation. Trust me it would not be very different from a not-so-long -distant-affair.
I wish you both the very best.
2006-12-20 10:14:23 · answer #2 · answered by susrsu 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is very difficult to maintain a long distance love affair. Both of you will have to commit to the future and at all times, never lose focus of what the final goal is. Patience is needed in large amounts for a long distance relation. Trust is also necessary. No point worrying about what your partner is upto in your absense. Both of you would lose your peace of mind. Constant contact is also needed. Phone calls, chats, mails, letters, all of these are needed and have to be continuous. But at the same time, it is necessary to remember that such kinds of communications can be ambiguous and can lead to misunderstandings. You both will have to face that together and be mature about it. Shouting and calling each other names or putting the blame on each other would not really help in such a situation. Also, don't isolate yourself from your partner and keep each other informed of whats happening in each one's life. This gives your partner a sense of being with you though far away.
Surprising your partner by sending gifts is also a nice way to keep the love alive. Total commitment is needed from both of you and you both should not give up come what ever the problems. It is tough but it is not impossible
2006-12-20 13:44:06 · answer #3 · answered by l_kur 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It will if it's meant to be... I dated a guy that went to war for six months; i couldn't wait for him 'cause i got too lonely...
Now i'm dating this guy that lives two hours away from me (it's not too far but because of work we're only able to see each other on the weekends).
It''s working out 'cause we're just taking it slow and not expecting too much of it yet; and also, i love the fact that i feel like i have freedom but still have somebody...
2006-12-20 08:01:27 · answer #4 · answered by aloe 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A real love does not need any kind of boundary either its distance or whatever. Love doesnt mean that unless and untell you touch physically, its not a love.Infact if u love anyone without any physical attraction, thats the real love.
2006-12-20 15:50:43 · answer #5 · answered by Almaas Ahmed 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
long distance affair real dont work out
2006-12-20 07:59:19 · answer #6 · answered by LilTee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well it could work, it would take a lot of work and dedication but still work at the end, i'm not saying it's gonna be easy...but don't give up on this relationship...not yet, wait to see if u actually love him =)...hope this helps
2006-12-20 07:58:11 · answer #7 · answered by Alejandra J 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It only works If you met before Because too many are elephants.
Extreemly large or wrinkled and rough.
2006-12-20 08:01:56 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
my 1st one it didn't work i only spoke english and she spoke spanish. For three years we went out long distance. She gave up on me. because i didn't know spanish. So i wnet out to learn it and then it was to late. 2nd one it worked out we where going out for a year. got married. and later on turned out to be crazy. :(
2006-12-20 08:00:13 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It can prove U once again- love is blind...no physical entity...Do U want to taste it ? then so many are there to cheat U ? Pl decide fast ?
2006-12-20 15:13:02 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋