I dated this guy for a month and 2 weeks, then he cheated on me, and I loved him so much, I was willing to forgive him for it once, but he broke up with me... well 6 months later he tells me he wants me back, and he promises not to cheat, and he tells me I was the best girl he ever had well I took him back, and now he has told me he loves me more than words can say, and he never said that to me before, and right now he is in jail (yea I kno thats not good, and all that but Im not here to talk about that or be lectured about how much of a troublemaker he is so please dont mention anything dealing with that) , anyways no one but parents can see or talk to him right now, so he had his mom call me and tell me he loves me, and he'll talk to me as soon as he can... I think he really has changed and he really does love me, and care like he says he does, but I was just wondering wat do u think? Does it seem like he really cares about me this time?
2006-12-20 07:22:31 · 10 answers · asked by I love a troublemaker! 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
First of all, no one can answer you yes or no on whether a "guy" can change. It's too general. Now the real question is can "your" guy change? I don't know how old you are or what your relationship was like with him, but from the what it appears to be, he will probably cheat on you again. I've always been big believer that once a cheater always a cheater, but not always a cheater with the same person.
I dated a guy back in high school that cheated on me numerous times, and yet, I still took him back over and over again with the logic that he could change. Well, after the fourth time being cheated on, I finally gave up. We still talk occasionally even 8 years later. He is happily married, and he has never cheated on his wife while dating and while being married. I found out that he keep cheating because he didn't feel I was the one, but he was comfortable with me so he would cheat, knowing that I would take him back. When he meet his wife, he never cheated out of fear of loosing her. That's how he knew she was the one. It made more sense now that I am older and about to married myself.
Now your guy may love you, he may be comfortable with you, but he may not be "the one" for you. Since no one can make that decision for you, you might want to step back and do some thinking.
How did being cheated on feel?
How would you feel if he cheated on you again?
Would you take him back?
Would you take him back if he did it a third time?
Do you feel that being with him outweighs the risk?
Would you rather be with someone that doesn't cheat on you?
Take a look at these questions and then make a decision based on what is best for YOU. Bless you heart and best of luck to you sweetie!
2006-12-20 07:36:51 · answer #1 · answered by angelkiss95670 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know you don't want me to mention anything but people that are in jail need any contact from the outside world. He is doing a lot of thinking in there and he probably can't get you out of his mind. Only because he is feeling guilty about doing what he did to you. Please I know it's going to be hard, but you really need to move on from this guy. Don't waste your time there is someone out there in the wings for you. Once a cheater always a cheater. Once a relationship occurs and then goes bad never ever look back move forward you owe that to yourself .Good luck and happy holidays!
2006-12-20 07:34:25 · answer #2 · answered by aimstir31 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No...you can't change him. Don't victimized yourself because it only gives him pride. Don't let this man steal your joy and beauty. I am 25 years old and I had learned from experience that you need to let people change on their own.
P.S men in jail would do anything to keep in touch with their girls so they could use them for money and when men come out of jail they still act the same old boyfriend who don't care about you, don't appreciate your help and loving care.
2006-12-20 07:35:51 · answer #3 · answered by LIZA 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe.
Or maybe you're the only one available who's willing to stand by him when he's in jail.
Frankly, given the fact that he cheated on you when you'd been going out for a whopping two weeks, I don't hold out much hope for this relationship.
2006-12-20 07:26:30 · answer #4 · answered by Karen L 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
And you females wonder why guys stopped being good guys.
Even a guy in jail is getting more attention than a nice guy with a job who hasnt been to jail.
2006-12-20 07:42:13 · answer #5 · answered by elisioloyd 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well i am young but i do have TWO answers for you:
1. If he was stupid enough to cheat on such a cool girl in the first place, i think he might just forget his words and do it again
2. If he loved you enough to have his MOM call you then i think he has always loved you but just made a couple mistakes
2006-12-20 07:27:17 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
being alone in a miserable state,in prison,made him realize what he had done wrong in the past,who are the people who mattered to him the most,we usually ponder on these things when we are alone and helpless.he never forgot you,and accepting him despite his situation now,will be a proof enough to him that it was not a mistake for him to have chosen you to love.give him another chance.he loves you.
2006-12-20 07:31:05 · answer #7 · answered by dra shelley 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ONCE A CHEATER ALWAYS A CHEATER ... HE WANTS YOU TO HANG AROUND AND WAIT FOR HIM..DON'T DO IT....TELL HIM TO GET IN TOUCH WHRN HE GETS OUT AND YOU WILL SEE THEN HOW THINGS GO..AS LONG AS YOU ARE STILL SINGLE
2006-12-20 07:30:24 · answer #8 · answered by lost 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
iF HE'S iN JAiL AND HE CAN STilL tHiNk ABOUt YOU tHEN iT SHOWS tHAt HiS HEARt iS tRUE AND tHAt HE REAlLY DiD CHANGE fOR YOU. HE WANtS U iN HiS LiFE.
2006-12-20 07:26:32 · answer #9 · answered by MiSSY M. 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
not him.
2006-12-20 07:38:01 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋