has your marriage ever gone through really bad times but you did not give up and leave?is iteven better now ?

Question

did you fight with all your heart to keep your marriage and it was worth it? did you love each other too much to leave even though you have gone through some awful problem like an affair or death? and you stayed and faught so hard for your marriage without giving up? how do you feel now? so many questions! but i would love to hear your stories. please tell me xx

Answer 1

I went through many rough times and gave up eventually. Im much happier since I divorced;

Answer 2

A death should never be a continuing problem in a marriage. Death is inevitable and unavoidable. Though a sudden death or a younger death is more tragic, the fact remains, WE MUST MOVE ON. Dwelling on a death is a waste of time and achieves nothing. A period of mourning is appropriate (no more than a week), but then it's time to get back to life.

An affair is another issue which the victim (person cheated on) has a very important question they need to ask themself if they consider accepting the cheater back in their life. First you must realize...after a spouse or partner cheats....there will never again be 100% trust. There will always be suspicion and suspicion, not proof, is enough to destroy a relationship. Even if 20 years have past and the cheater stays late at work, goes out with friends, etc.. that past thought will be in the mind of the victim. Therefore, the question is simply....can you live like that? IF that answer is yes, then you should NEVER again bring up the topic of the affair. You have decided to accept this person back into your life, therefore, do not make them pay for the mistake forever. If the answer is no, then obviously, you know the next step.

If you are capable of handling that question and circumstance, then there should not be another fight about it. Move on.

Answer 3

All marriages go through bad patches especially in the early years as you have to learn to compromise with each other!
I have been through several, we lost a child and I felt life wasn't worth living and that my Hubby didn't really care! Luckily he didn't give up on me! He had an affair with an older woman which nearly ended our marriage too but we stayed together and worked it out. We've had money problems and others that also could have split us up. Now I feel we both did the best we could at the time and if anything it has made our marriage really strong! We love each other More than ever and have been married for 36 years. Was it worth it!!! A very definate YES!

Answer 4

I have been married for ten years.

We have had our rough spots and clashes and arguements that made one of us leave the house and not come back for a while.

We love each other too much to give up so we faught to keep it together.

One thing we almost always discovered was happening when this occurred was there were secrets.

Sometimes big, sometime small and usually not related to what we were arguing about.

One of us had done something which we knew wasn't okay. We didn't tell the other and felt bad, secretly. This built up to stupid arguements about stupid things - not the actual problem.

When we told each other these secrets, even though they were painful. And worked out how to make up anything that was damaged because of the action or secret. We found we loved each other more afterwards.

This has worked for me, and as I said, happily married for ten years now :)

Answer 5

I have not only gone through this in my marriage, but also in some very close friendships.

The people that we count on the most to lift us up are the ones we fight for. Spouses, best friends, siblings, etc. It is worth it to keep them around, especially when you know they'd fight for you.

I'd rather not share specifics here... but my wife and I have a MUCH stronger marriage now than we did during the first & second years. I can't imagine my life without her (not that I ever could or did). She is the most important thing to me, bar none.

My best friend and I are also stronger than ever. We have had some disagreements in the past, but nothing that we couldn't overcome. He's definitely the best friend I've ever had, and probably the best I ever will have. I'd die for him and he knows it.

Answer 6

I went through LOTS of rough times with my first wife, but we went into our marriage with the attitude that divorce was not an option, so we spent many nights where we were up all night talking, arguing, fighting (but not hitting) and we didn't go to bed because we were working out our issues. She threatened to leave me several times because I wasn't satisfying her needs, and there was more than one occasion where I was tempted to cheat on her, but I never did because I couldn't bring myself to do that to her and she never did look elsewhere for fulfillment. Our marriage got better and stronger, right up to the day that a police officer showed up on my doorstep and told me my wife had been killed in a car accident. I'm married again, and this marriage is quite a bit less volatile because we're both older and more mature, but we both have the same attitude that I had the first time around: divorce is not an option.

Answer 7

This coming August I'll be married for 10 years. In the 10 years we have battled drug use, paternity suit, deportation, dependant family members and a terminally ill child. There have been so many times I have desperately wanted out but stayed for the sake of giving my little girl a life with both parents.

My husband and I still fight a lot, but it's apparent to the both of us that we are in it for the long run. I have days that I revert to thinking I am better off without him, but I try to have faith. Marriages are thrown away far too easy these days and I don't want to be a statistic.

Answer 8

I've been with my husband 6 years and married for 2. We've already gone through some very bad times - he's moved out! BUT - we continued our relationship with him moved out - have tried to fix the broken bits and are looking forward to moving in together again in 2007. Marriage can be very hard - almost like imaginary walls - but when we remember that actually we are best friends then it gets easier.

Answer 9

we've had difficult patches many cases. each and every time we do I merely attempt to appreciate that this section will bypass. i recognize how coronary heart breaking it could be to wish a baby, yet you won't be able to. at the same time as my husband and that i first began attempting it took us 2 years earlier we had a baby. each and each month we may get our hopes up and then could manage the enable down. you merely could spotlight one yet another. keep in ideas, that inspite of no toddler you're nevertheless human beings that love one yet another and finished one yet another. I now have 3 appropriate little ones, so do not supply up. We those days went by skill of yet another difficult patch. My son has had 3 surgical procedures contained in the surprising twelve months and our well being insurance dropped us (inner most - no longer a collection plan). between nerve-racking about our son and the monetary stress ($60,000) it develop into tearing us aside. finally, we merely realized that those complications do not have any further some thing to do with how we experience about one yet another. We realized that we were blessed merely to have one yet another. the topics will come and flow. merely carry in there. keep in ideas why you fell in love and carry on to that.

Answer 10

I've been through hell and back with my marriage! I got married when i was 18 to a military man we moved to another state where i was totally isolated from familly and friends not to mention he bought a stick shift and i couldnt drive one cause i didnt know how i was so scared and lonely i had no friends. 4 years later he got an honerable discharge and we moved where he is from totally disregarding my family which was a total mistake!!! That wasn't fair! But i chose that for myslef and regret it. I would do anything to make that guy happy i would go to hell and back and i already havr. We have no finacial stability seems like every 8 months we he looses his job. If it wasn't for his parents we would be homeless but we do work for them in return for our bills and spending money. Thats just my story.