are other homeschooling moms so strict??

Question

Hi i am girl who is homeschooled. I am the youngest one in my family and my mom does my schooling we use ABeka system for that. I like it most of the time i have friends from church and my best freind homeschooled to but sometimes it gets bad with just me and my mom and i get bored with just studying with her all the time and she give me lots to do!! Not just schooling but Bible study too i do with her but i like that better. Shes strict about things tho and sometimes i get frustrated with haveing to do stuff all the time and then i end up getting her mad cos i dont listen to her and shell say im acting up and i have to stand in the corner until i can do better or she takes me to my bedroom and spanks me for not minding her. Is she just strict like old fashioned or other family like that to???

Oh and i am 12 and girl in 6th grade.

You still in a grade you have even when you do homeschool.

Answer 1

I was raised by my single dad, and he was pretty strict like that. I wasn't homeschooled, although I homeschool my two now. But I attended a private Christian school. I couldn't wear jeans, or see an R movie or wear makeup or date until I was 16. I did always know though that my dad really loved me and was trying to help me, keep me safe, make sure I would get to college, etc.

Maybe you should try listening to her. It sounds like it is a frustrating situation for both of you when you don't. Have you talked to your mom about having some positive consequences instead of just negative consequences like spanking & getting punished so you have positive incentives to listen to her and get your work done? Like if you do your chores and homework & follow all the rules, you get X as a reward like either allowance money at the end of the week or to go to the movies or mall or just free time to spend how you want or whatever reward(s) you two can work out together. I hope everything works out!

Answer 2

Eh, I'd say we're somewhere in the middle, we have seven kids and we're homeschooling. We don't use a set curriculum, we follow the state PASS goals and study on our own. We have about an hour and half of chores a day (it's a big messy house with so many people) but we're kind of flexible about how people do things there, and we're very flexible about how schoolwork is done. We have certain things that HAVE to be done, and the rest can slide.

However, that is what works for our family. I would say that perhaps your mom is strict about schoolwork because she doesn't want you to fall behind on anything, and that's the only way she knows to do it. I don't swat my children, but my eleven year old just got grounded for a day for being outright disobedient. I do know other families who swat older children for disobedience.

Maybe if you could spend a few weeks really working hard and busting out the paperwork, being respectful and stuff, you'd have a place to stand when you say, "mom, I could really use some personal time each day, to just choose my own activities" You've already shown her that you are willing to do the work and self-motivated, so she'll be more likely to rearrange the schedule.

Answer 3

She's strict. I don't know why she's that strict, unless she's an old mother or was raised by one.

If you were my daughter, you would not be spanked as you are too old for that. Bible study would be up to you. I would not force religion on you. Standing in the corner is also too preschool for you. Your punishments would be no TV or something like that until you finish your work.

I can't really judge, as every family is different, but I was raised by a young mother and I had my first child at 23. My husband comes from an old family and they are all like that. He has aunts and uncles in their 80's, my grandmother wasn't even 80 when she died. I think a lot of it has to do with the age gaps between mother and child.

Answer 4

She's not so strict that you don't have access to the internet... My 12 year old certainly does not have internet access. And he doesn't write as well, so good job on that!

Your mom is trying to look out for you. Why do you think she wants you to do school work? Do you think she enjoys fighting with you about it? Right or wrong, she's your mom and as long as there's no abuse involved you should obey your mother. You know the bible instructs children to obey their parents. You know Christ taught us to be humble and submissive to authority. I struggle with those things sometimes, but that doesn't mean I can ignore the bible.

I suggest you ensure by prayer and self-evaluation that you do not have a disobedient heart and, if you honestly feel that there is too much pressure then at a comfortable time, come up with a plan to discuss with your mom. Perhaps you can promise to have certain chapters complete in a time frame or maybe you could offer to take the final test of a subject to 'skip' it.

As a homeschool parent, I assure you this same subject is stressing your mother. If you step up and take responsibility for a plan, she might let you 'do it your way.'

You didn't mention a dad, but if the dynamics of your family allow, see if you can get him involved in the subject--not to get around mom, but to help resolve the stress level.

Answer 5

You know, I've not been homeschooled but my mom is also very strict. Whenever I didn't obey (which happened very often), she shouted at me and I've been punished in many different ways...but, you know, now I'm really grateful she never gave up and let me do what I wanted to. She somehow changed the little, stubborn girl into a responsible person. I think one day you'll find out how much your mom gives you. Though you think she's maybe not fair, she only does it because she loves you. Ok. that standing-in-the-corner-thingy is a little strange to me since this way of punishing has never been practised in my family but I guess it's alright.

Answer 6

I am a homeschool mom and I am just like your mom. For moms we want our kids to be as prepared as possible for whatever choices or oppourtunities they face. So we want you to be able to be self sufficient. Be able to clean, cook, wash clothes, pay bills, iron, and understand the importance of having a well run home. Because ones that aren't run well can make everything in your life harder. Right now you probably feel like, what does it matter if my room is messy today or I don't unload the dishwasher right now, but when you become an adult your room is the whole house and the mess will take on alife of its own if you don't stay on top of it and if you don't do the dishes then there is no sink space to wsh veggies for dinner or the pot you need maybe dirty, so now you have 2 hungry screaming kids and a husband who has worked all day and dinner is delayed 30 minutes while you scrub this mornings eggs. Also responsibility is like and other school subject. With reading you started with recognizing letters and their sounds and then began small words building up to books, soon you can read anything. With math you learned numbers and counting which you needed to learn addition and subtraction which you needed for multiplication and division, soon you will use all those skils for science and chemistry and algebra. Responsibility works the same way you start with learing to keep a few toys picked up, next you are responsible for your whole room, next add helping with dishes, then laundry...soon you can run your own home. How would you expect her to behave if one day you said OK That is it I am not doing math. To us it is the same.

Another lesson she is teaching you is respect for authority. You will always have a boss and they will always tell you things to get done, sometimes they won't tell you, you will just have to notice it on your own. If you don't it will mean poor performance reviews, less promotions and raises, or being laid of or fired.

Today we homeschool moms see children who come from familes who expect schools to raise them, A job they can never do, So too many children are left without guidance. They are a mess. She wants nothing but the best of you. It would be way nicer if we could just let our kids play all day. If there was a robot maid and automated kitchen like in the Jetsons and we could all just relax. Wouldn't it be nice for her if you didn't see her as an old fashioned nag who has no idea what it is like to be you? Wouldn't it be nice for you to never have her bother you to do something, to be able to stay up late, watch whatever you want, do whatever you want? Wouldn't there be less fighting? Yes, but that is not love. And we moms love our children, so here we are.

I know that none of this makes it easier, I know it doesn't make it fun, but I thought you should hear our side from someone not your mom.

Good luck and God Bless you and your family during this Christmas season.

Answer 7

Wow hon, that's wild.

Perhaps you can respectfully (I emphasize respectfully)ask your mom to check into some different homeschooling methods. I'm homeschooling my 6 year old and 2 year old.

We use the eclectic method. We don't use one brand of curriculum and do alot of studies based on what she's interested in. Now that doesn't mean she never does something she doesn't want to do. I don't even write a

For instance, she's in 1st grade but learning how to type correctly on the computer. She wasn't yet interested in physical science, but loves earth science so we're doing that instead. She got bored with addition so we're doing double and triple digit multiplication. Which she's still learning addition, but it's more interesting.

Check out this site for different homeschooling styles.

Answer 8

I wish my mom would've made ME do work. Instead, she visited people in prison while my siblings and I stayed home and ate cereal in front of the TV all day... seriously.

And since she never made us do ANY work, by the time I was 12, she finally put us in school, and since I never learned anything, I had to start out in 2nd grade. So because my mom never made me do work, I got stuck, now almost 18 and got kicked out of school AND failed 7th grade, all because the age and anger about it made me not care about my grades anymore.

By the way, when I was homeschooled, I had NO friends up until I was 12. Imagine, the only people EVER coming to your birthdays or something were just family, no friends. It was lonely, and I think my mom kind of screwed up with me for not putting me in school or teaching me what I'm supposed to know by now.

I hope you don't end up the same way, just do your work, or else one day your mom might get frustrated with you, and decide to put you in school... and it's better not to be 17 in 6th and 7th grade.

I hope I was understandable.

Answer 9

All women can be quite carried away with their children. You will know when you had a child of your own.

You should talk to her about your problems.

If that failed, I suggest you talk to your father or her husband/partner (if it isn't the same as your father) or her closest relative (if she didn't have a husband) regarding your problems.


Your problems are:

- conlicts between you and your mother

- you get bored with just studying with your mother all the time

- your mother give you too much to do

- your mother is inflexible about your needs

- you're frustrated with having to do stuff all the time

- you sometimes triggered your mother to become mad

- your mother said she was mad because she said you don't listen to her and acting up

- you need a constant and strict rules of what is punishable and what is not, also if it is punishable, what it will be punished with

Answer 10

Heya. I was actually home-schooled too from the 4th grade all through high-school. My mom was just as strict as yours until I was in high-school. It was very hard and I didn't even have the benefit of brothers, sisters or a best friend so in that respect you are actually very lucky. It will get better and one day you'll be all grown up and this will all be behind you.

Hang in there. :)