she's jealous of this and that, someone's being mean to her, she wants choc. milk instead of reg. milk etc... She cries over everything. I don't understand why she can't just ask for something instead of just starting to cry. I've tried to talk to her but she can't control it, it seems. Any ideas? Help!
2006-12-20 03:31:01 · 17 answers · asked by lilmama 4 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
Don't give her what she wants when she cries. She has learned that this works, so she will keep doing it until it doesn't work anymore.
When she starts this, make her stop and tell you in a normal voice without crying what she wants. If she can't, she doesn't get what she wants. If she comes to you crying that someone is mean, tell her that some kids are mean and we just keep on being nice and having fun. No catering to the tears! No positive attention for the tears! Give lots and lots and lots of positive attention for everything else she does right. She will stop the tears.
2006-12-20 03:35:28 · answer #1 · answered by Phoenix, Wise Guru 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
I believe that she is a little spoiled. Instead of giving in to her when she does this, explain to her that she will not get what she wants until she stops crying and can ask for it. Make her use her words. Once she realizes that you are not going to give in, she will change her behavior. If she continues, let her cry. It will not hurt her. Just remind her that the longer she cries, the longer it will be till she gets what she wants. Be patient and most of all be firm. If you don't stop it now, she will only get worse. Children do not grow out of being spoiled.
2006-12-20 03:41:14 · answer #2 · answered by Liz A 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
what is her dad's outlook? It would be wise to switch to juice to avoid constipation. This uncomfortable feeling could lead to the being upset. Besides that, if the chocolate milk has high fructose corn syrup, do you and your child a favor, find chocolate made with real sugar not the syrup. Set boundaries for certain behaviors and expectations and stick to them. Be patient, these changes usually don't happen over night but the outcome is worth it. Think it's bad now, make the changes or wait and see how things are during the teen years.........
2006-12-20 03:40:54 · answer #3 · answered by str_atKnowledge 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
What will work best would be to do some active listening. Children will often resort to crying when their parent is not actively listening. When their request is tuned out, they resort to crying to be heard.
When she starts to cry, get down to her level, look her in the eyes, and listen. Reflect back to her what you hear. Recognize her, hear her, “see” her, and take her seriously. Don’t argue with her and don’t get “wishy washy,” i.e., “I think about that” or “Maybe tomorrow.” Say for example that she is crying for a cookie. Say things like “I know you really want a cookie. I wish a cookie was a healthy choice. I bet you would enjoy the biggest cookie in the world!” If she continues to cry after you have actively listened and reflected back what you hear, say to her “I’m finished talking about that.”
Help her to better express her feelings by empathizing with her. Say things like “I can tell you’re feeling very (angry, upset, hurt, mad, frustrated). What can we do about that?” Empathizing is a great way to help young children learn to express their emotions.
Help her to feel like a “Big girl” by saying things like “You did that by yourself! You climbed super high! You must be so proud! You can run super fast!” “You used so many colors on your picture!” These phrases are great ways to help her to feel powerful, gain confidence, and show attention in a positive way. Hope this helps! Good luck!
2006-12-20 14:15:13 · answer #4 · answered by marnonyahoo 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Let her know that crying is not the way to go about solving things, and that you will not jump to her commands because she is crying. If she persists, just let her cry it out, and tell her that if she wants the situation to change, she is going to have to ask you politely. She may cry for a half hour, but, eventually she will calm down and change her tone. It sounds like she knows she has you around her little finger, and that will only change when you let her know you're not going to allow her to get away with it anymore.
2006-12-20 03:35:56 · answer #5 · answered by rhino 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
have you ever watched The Nanny? This might be a good time to take notes. She acts this way because you allow it. You need to say no and mean no, then have a consequense when she disobeys. Do not allow the crying, send her to her room until she is done crying and can act like a big girl, then love on her when she does the right thing, she wants to please you, she does not really want to be in control. CATCH HER BEING GOOD!!!!!
2006-12-20 04:03:55 · answer #6 · answered by northville 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Try and not indulge her too much. She's crying for attention (it seems) and you giving her everything she wants isn't going to help. Ignore her until she asks properly. If it gets on your nerves, leave the room for a little bit. She has to leave self-control and that she can't just cry when she wants something.
Hope that helps.
2006-12-20 03:36:02 · answer #7 · answered by Meg 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
she is spoiled. Just ignore the bad behaivor while she is throwing fits. Just walk away until it is over. She will scream, cry, kick, everything. Just ignore it. When it is over, and she can talk like a normal person, then let her ask. If she is good, give it to her, ifnot then let her get over it. I have been there.
2006-12-20 03:36:44 · answer #8 · answered by sr22racing 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
my 6 yr old boy does this and what I do is tell him I dont understand whining, or the crying and if he wants something he has to ask like a normal person, basically ignore the bad behavior and praise the good, its just a faze :)
2006-12-20 03:50:46 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I won't get my, 2yr old daughter anything that she cries about. I tell her to ask like a big girl and I will get it. And I ask my 7yr old son that if you cry does it make it happen, or if you ask nicely does it happen? I just gotta ask though, w/ your nickname being spoiled princess... do you maybe see a pattern?
2006-12-20 03:42:14 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋