My son needs me with him to fall asleep. If he wakes up in the middle of the night he will yell for me and I have to either fall back to sleep with him or wait for him to go to sleep before going back to my bed. Is this common for a 4 year old and what can I do to break him of this habit. I understand he is afraid of the dark ... but can I get him to sleep on his own?
2006-12-20 03:27:03 · 9 answers · asked by Just ME ! 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
It's normal for kids to try to put these kinds of demands on their parents. All you need to do is stop catering to him. Put him in his bed and leave. If he gets out, put him back. If he wakes up, let him yell until he falls back to sleep or it's time to get up. Once he no longer gets the response he wants, he will stop taking these actions.
It will be hard. There will be a lot of crying. You won't get much sleep for a week, but you just have to put him to bed and leave him alone.
2006-12-20 03:31:14 · answer #1 · answered by Phoenix, Wise Guru 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think that if he is afraid of the dark then first you need to get a night light and you need to relay to him that he needs to be a "big Boy" and "big boys" sleep in their own beds!! Then you need to put him in his bed at bed time and he will probably get out of bed or cry. If he gets out of bed put him back in bed WITHOUT saying a word. You will probably have to continue doing this until he falls asleep. It could be 10 minutes to 2 hours but keep going as it will work. You will also have to continue doing this for a few days to weeks until he understands that he is to sleep in his bed!! If he just cries and doesn't get out of bed, then try not to go into his room. Just like when babies are very young, you have to let them cry for a while and most of the time they will put themselves to sleep. I know if will be very hard on you as well but in the long run you will be able to go to bed when you want and not when your 4 year old is. Try hard and don't give in!!!
2006-12-20 11:37:21 · answer #2 · answered by mjp4_28_05 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Keep a nightlight on in his room and in the hallway. Tell him when he's awake during the day that he has to sleep by himself all night and not yell for you. Keep reminding him of that throughout the day.
If he yells for you, try to ignore him. If you must go to him, do not get into the bed. Just tuck him in and say good night again. He must learn to break this cycle.
Don't worry...he will learn to sleep on his own, all night, by himself. It may take a few weeks, but you have to be firm.
Good luck!
Mari
2006-12-20 11:31:11 · answer #3 · answered by mari m 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is going to be tough for you and you will probably be really tired for about a week, but I went through this with my son. You have to put him to bed in his own bed and no matter how much he cries or how long he cries make him stay in his own bed and go to sleep on his own. Put a night light in his room or one of the lava lamps or something to help light his room to make him feel more comfortable. When he wakes up in the middle of the night just go in his room and lay him back down, tell him you love him and insist he go back to sleep on his own. He will cry and it will be hard, but in about a week or two he will adjust to the change and he will go to sleep on his own without needing you to be in the room. And he will stop crying when you put him to bed, and won't want to come to bed with you when he wakes up. Good luck.
2006-12-20 11:53:00 · answer #4 · answered by breezymourn 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I only know what you have told us in your info, but I would be willing to bet that you have set yourself up for this to happen. Just a guess, but . . . you can fix the problem, it will just be hard. You will have to refuse to crawl into bed with your child. Maybe start by sitting next to the bed but not touching the child, then move to across the room, just outside the door, etc. It will mean less sleep for you in the short term, until your child relearns to self console, but in the long run it will help you gain sleep hours and sleep quality. Good Luck! Decide your plan of action and stick with it.
2006-12-20 11:35:22 · answer #5 · answered by hick333 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I went through the same thing. It will take some time but I suggest that you get him a nightlight that is a little brighter than normal and you might want to try getting him a stuffed animal to sleep with. That way he will have a friend with him at all time. Just be patient.
2006-12-20 11:31:31 · answer #6 · answered by Liz A 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The only thing I can think of is that maybe he is having bad dreams and is scared. I know my son needs a nightlight on when he goes to sleep. I would try that.
2006-12-20 12:14:38 · answer #7 · answered by carangel82 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
some kids just do this, get him a night light if he is really afraid of the dark, tell him he should be a big boy and stay in his bed.....watch Super Nanny and get some awesome ideas :)
2006-12-20 11:52:39 · answer #8 · answered by Justwonderin 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my daughter did the same thing. Now she takes the dog to bed with her and she feels safe.
2006-12-20 11:30:03 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋