im sort of going out with this guy but it isnt going very well because i hardly see him and hardly talk to him....its only just sort of started...and....
i was chatting to his friend, and he told me all this stuff about him...
apparently his dad is an alcoholic and beats him, he puts him down and pisses him off, and he is always fighting with his brothers....so its why he's always depressed and he goes counselling.
and his friend told me not to tell him i know all of this because he'll get vexed...and i dont want that. its the xmas holidays and im not going to see him (its a long story...i havent even got his number!), but anyway....
i feel so helpless! and really sorry for him, what shall i say when i see him again? i want him to open up to me coz i care for him and i want to help.
2006-12-20 03:21:24 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I think you could just say that you care for him and if he needs someone to talk to, you will be there for him.
You can't make him open up, that'll have to come from him, but if he knows that you will be willing to listen and support him without being judgemental then he will know that there is someone he can speak to. Even if his father does beat him, he may not want to hear other people (you) judging his father, so just try to be a good listener.
Hope that helps, good luck.
2006-12-20 03:34:30 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
if ur not 2 know what this guys life is like than u probably should let him tell u and if he wanted ur help he'd ask. dont feel sorry 4 someone and expect to fix it.
2006-12-20 03:34:50 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Recommend that he links up with al-anon (via that friend)
Be available.
Make sure you treat him as important, whatever his Dad says about him.
He will on;y be able to open up to you when you have proved yourself to be a trustworthy friend.
That may take time (a lot of it!)
But stick in there.
2006-12-20 03:26:28 · answer #3 · answered by alan h 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't pry.
Don't feel sorry for him. No one wants pity.
Just do nice things for him. Let HIM open up to you. Not the other way around.
2006-12-20 03:24:25 · answer #4 · answered by Trollhair 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u should show him that u care alot about him when u see him and try to be considarate. u can also tell him to open up 2 u cz if he finds out that his friend told u hell get mad ...u know trust.
2006-12-20 03:56:26 · answer #5 · answered by curious 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell him that you really care about him and that you want him to be completely honest with you and that you want him to be able to talk to you about anything. then start by telling him some stuff about you and your life to show him that you trust him and are willing to not only listen but to also talk.
2006-12-20 03:25:32 · answer #6 · answered by ~sasha~ 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dont go looking to work miracles but if you decide to try Give it all youve got and then some.
2006-12-20 03:27:38 · answer #7 · answered by ladybug 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
listen to the first three advices and give hugs, lots of them.
2006-12-20 03:32:08 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He sounds like he is damaged goods ..... my advice is to move on he will bring you nothing but trouble....
2006-12-20 03:28:46 · answer #9 · answered by Fox Hunter 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him how you feel
2006-12-20 04:02:11 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋