knew D recently. D tells me some of the girls at his workplace are very pretty but he insists he never gone out with them even when they ask him out.
He says he's afraid they just want his riches n he looks for inner beauty.
When I jokingly ask if I am pretty, he says No I am not pretty .
How can this be?? I know I am not beauty queen but I think I am at least 7 out of 10 .
My friends tell me I'm quite pretty (and I didn't ask them)
D says No, I am only 5 out of 10 because I am really not pretty AT ALL.
then he says that he doesn't go for looks AT ALL because he is looking for a marriage partner and inner beauty.
How can this be?? Is he playing games?? what is happening?? Is he interested in me??
i thot he interested in me until he said I'm not pretty AT ALL.
GUYS WON'T LOVE SOMEONE THEY DON'T FIND PRETTY, RIGHT?? IS HE TELLING TRUTH?? WHICH PART IS LIE???
He's not handsome. but i dun think he's trying to make me feel insecure so i go w him & no one else??
2006-12-20 00:52:15 · 28 answers · asked by Woman321 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
he said that he finds me attractive .... not pretty but attractive....
2006-12-20 00:57:46 · update #1
actually.. HE is ugly. not just not handsome but ugly. but most women don't fall for men's looks. I like him for other things about his charisma and i find him sexy even though he's UGLY. We knew each other only recently , actually, but i'm just thnking ahead beause i don't want to waste time dating if it's not going to work.
i'm concerned because even though man's looks don't usually matter to women, most of the time women's looks matter to men especially first impression!!!!!
2006-12-20 01:07:22 · update #2
unknown doe, u are so far off the mark. Read teh details carefully and you will easily see that I'm not conceited like what you wrote :) I'm actually insecure.
2006-12-20 01:12:54 · update #3
Well it sounds as if the Man in your life is trying to be brutally honest.
are you pretty? do you feel pretty?
just go out and make your self as pretty as you can.
make sure you make yourself happy.
that is all that is important.
Forget about D.
Let him come to you.
Just make sure you dont compromise your morals or your self.
and dont wait on an engagement ring. It sounds like D is doing damage to your esteem- whether he is trying to or not.
Just remember that the most important thing is that God finds you to be BEAUTIFUL- smile and the beauty within you will shine!!
2006-12-20 01:02:12 · answer #1 · answered by tbaby 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
While his saying you're not pretty is not the nicest thing to do, he might just be trying to prove to you that he is in fact not looking for beauty, but a great person. I know some people who are very demonstrative about the things they do and say - and they don't necessarily think as far as how something they say will make their partner feel (would D be one of them?). You could ask him what kind of things he finds attractive in you (as in your characteristics), but give him some time to answer, those questions are hard if they need to be verbalised, especially by men. Also, if he's not the most handsome, he might reckon he is better of with someone not better looking than him, so he doesn't have to fear losing you. However, having said all this - try to make sure he is not an abuser who will totally try to control you once you are married. Read up on it - you're on the net already anyway. Good Luck!
2006-12-20 00:58:50 · answer #2 · answered by Julia S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The part where you said 'Guys won't love someone they won't find pretty' is wrong. Inner beauty are the key words here. Don't get distracted wen he says you're not pretty. It lowers your self esteem, which you really need right now. He's telling you that he DOES like you, just not for your beauty. He values inner beauty, and so you shouldn't be distracted if he doesn't think you're pretty. Your friends do, and that's all that matters.
Obviously a guy can marry you if he doesn't think you're pretty.
2006-12-20 00:56:27 · answer #3 · answered by i6am6satan6 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you would want to end up with someone who is going to say mean things like that to you. Whether he is joking or not, that is mean to say and he is making you feel bad. If he's not honestly attracted to you even a little, then that's not a good sign that the relationship could work out either. There needs to be some kind of attraction both ways.
~Kyle
2006-12-20 00:55:07 · answer #4 · answered by Kyleontheweb 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not really. There usually is a physical attractiont that draws a person to want to get to know you better. If he's saying you're not pretty, then he obviously doesn't like you. When you like someone, no matter how they look, they begin to look better and better each day. You said that he's not that good looking but i'm sure you still like some of his facial features because you like him. Love is blind and if he's saying that u don't appeal at all to him, not only is he shallow, but he's not the one for you.
2006-12-20 00:58:06 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
In my mind there has to be SOME kind of chemistry going on for a marriage to be succfessful and balanced - because there is very important side to it that is sexual, it's just a fact. So I would never advise someone to marry someone who a) wasn't attracted to them or b) they weren't attracted to. He could well marry you, he might have that capacity. But it would probably make you both very unhappy and your sex life very unfulfilled if he is not attracted to you and doesn't desire you physically. You're not gonna feel good as a woman, and your sex with him will probably feel like he's being mechanical - because it WONT be about any desire he has for you. He'll just be doing it.
So then you have a sexually unfulfilled marriage, and all that might happen is he MIGHT one day find a woman who does have "inner beauty" and outer beauty to match, and he might well enjoy being attracted to her....and then you've lost your hubbie (or got an unfaithful one). Which is pants, coz marriage is for life. OR, you feel unfulfilled, emotionally (because women LIKE to be desired, right? It's good for our emotional state) and sexually, and then one day along comes a man who DOES desire you. He makes you feel attractive, makes you feel special...you feel good, you want it, you're unfaithful or you leave...
Pointless. Find someone who is besotted with you. Who adores you. Who wants you for EVERYTHING you are. Who looks at you and thinks you are the most beautiful woman in his world. That will feel SO much better....it doesn't even sound like you are attracted to him or even like him....so just why?!
I would say STAY AWAY. Find another one. Happy man hunting! :)
2006-12-20 01:01:28 · answer #6 · answered by mayflower57 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he neesds a trustworthy person to be with and that's why he is talking about inner beauty.
No. not all guys look for pretty girls, some of them really want the inner beauty.
IF he is straight farwardly saying you are not pretty at all, this really sounds strange. No guy would say like this. But he seems to be a nice guy, you can go with him, i didn't find anything wrong with it. Have a nice day :)
2006-12-20 01:01:18 · answer #7 · answered by shon 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well personaly i think that he is just playing games with you. all though some guys say that your inner beauty is what counts, they know they dont really mean it. maybe he is just trying to use you or to see if you are interested in his so called riches. dont let no body fool you and please if he was really interested in you he would not call you ugly. because even the ugliest girls in the world find love and their the most beautiful women in their mans eyes!
2006-12-20 01:02:12 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
in my opinion if ur not physically attracted to a girl it probably wont work but they must have a great personality too maybe he really is only concerned with inner beauty maybe hes just playing a joke on u and really thinks ur quite pretty
2006-12-20 00:55:20 · answer #9 · answered by HanginByAMoment 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
To be honest why would you want to marry a guy who thinks you not gorgeous at all & is looking at other girls at the office/workplace.
Girl move him out of your life.There is someone way better out there for you who will love you for who you are & love you for how gorgeous you are.
Aint let him get to you because you can do so much better. He is probably just seen how far he can take it.
MOVE HIM OUT OF THE PICTURE & OUT OF YOUR LIFE. Negative people are not good to have around anyways. Trust me
2006-12-20 00:57:32 · answer #10 · answered by MEHNAZ B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋