I have a question to ask... I have two kids under the age of two, my daughter is almost two years old, and my son is less than 2 months old. I don't have a bond or connection with my son, I know he's there, I know he needs attention and love but I just don't feel the connection. With my daughter, we bond, we are like one, she is my one and only. Is there any explantion to this?
2006-12-01 22:32:07 · 9 answers · asked by userdefined 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
A man's child is important to him but the bonding of parent and child is more prominent between mother and child than the father and child. It is the mother who gave the life from her womb, it is the mother who feeds the child from her body, it is the mother who has the primal claim of the first bond. The father should stay away from that for the first three months of the child's life.
You will not bond to your son as you do to your daughter. The bond between a man and his daughter is more of a weld than what he would have with his son.
This has a lot to do with the difference between male and female, a subject that takes a lot of explanation. Suffice to say that your boy is not a girl! You will bond with him. But in a much different manner than what you have with your daughter.
The bonds that tie a man and his son are bonds that are built in moments throughtout their lives. Special hours that stand out in your memory with your own father are indications of what you can expect for your son. He will grow up with ideals and morals of a man from what he bonds with by your actions. His memories will be those of an hour or moment that bond him to you. This is what you can expect in bonding with your son; so it no surprise that your connection with your son is not there yet. It will be. But he is as much a male as you and your father are. The bonding will go as far as your actions go. Act aloof, that's the type of bonding to expect in twenty years. Act with a man's honest love then that is what you can expect with your son's bonding to you. You've got decades to build this bonding relationship so don't concern yourself with his time he has with his mother. In another month or two it will start in earnest for the rest of your lives.
2006-12-02 01:53:59 · answer #1 · answered by the old dog 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give it time. Guys don't relate to babies too well. Once that little boy grabs your finger as you are walking the connection will be there instantly. If you want to ensure that it starts, begin by buying father and son items. A small baseball mitt here, a pup tent there, guy stuff. Don't dwell on this dude! It's normal now! Really! Enjoy your time with your daughter in the mean time. You'll probably ask this question again in about 11-12 years about her! Isn't parenting fun?!
2006-12-02 06:46:24 · answer #2 · answered by delux_version 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your Daughter is your first born, you've had 2 years to watch her grow, learn things and get to know her and bond with her. Your son is only 2 months old, so all he can do right now is eat & sleep mostly. As he begins to grow & crawl and develop a personality, your bond will grow. Also, remember that when children are very young, girls ar Daddy's girls and boys tend to be Mommy's boys. Enjoy it while it lasts...they grow up so fast. Don't worry...everything will work out.
2006-12-02 08:49:13 · answer #3 · answered by vanhammer 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes bonding takes time. What you find special with you daughter some father's have that feeling immediately with their sons. It isn't often that we fall in love at first sight of our partners, so as with any feelings - give it time and patience I'm sure it will all work out
2006-12-02 06:37:10 · answer #4 · answered by Ann O 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your daughter is older & can communicate with you.
Your son is just a baby, in time the two of you will bond when he can move around more and communicate.
Give it time.
2006-12-02 06:37:03 · answer #5 · answered by eyes_of_iceblue 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You'll probably see changes as your son gets a little older and wants to do boy things. My ex didn't do much of anything with the boys until they got a little older and into sports and such. Then he was constantly doing things with them. ;o)
2006-12-02 08:45:03 · answer #6 · answered by ? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dont know about the explaination thing... but u have to change whe way things are.... talk to you'r son.... make him yr friend as yr daughter is.... if he grow up to feel this different in the way u treat him... comparin to his sister.... i gota tell you.... he wont be fine..... get a move...
2006-12-02 06:34:45 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
its the battle of the sexes male to female and female to male
2006-12-02 06:34:25 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
talk to a councilor and figure out what is going on and please try bonding with this child you may surprise yourself.
2006-12-02 07:37:40 · answer #9 · answered by bluedanube69 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋