Am I wrong for doing this?

Question

For some reason i get upset everytime my boyfriend goes out to clubs, even just with his buddies
I don't go to clubs because i know he wouldn't like it, and on top of it I'm not so crazy about going out to clubs anyways
maybe because i don't go out b/c he doesn't like it, i kinda expect him not going out too, because it makes me really upset
he just called and told me that he is going to clubs right now
and i was getting bitchy and upset
and he said that this is stupid and maybe we shouldn't be together because he can't deal with it anymore
we have been together for 3 years
this is just too harsh for him to say such thing, b/c he knows it will crush my heart
is he saying it just b/c he was angry, or is he for real?
am i wrong for getting upset?
i feel like this relationship is not equal
would it help if i go out too?
we live in different cities, so we definitely can't go out together
i'm starting to think he is right
b/c he is out going and is used to going to clubs

so we hung up after this argument about why the hack do i get upset over things like this
i mean he is right about me liking to be by myself, while he is just absolutely incapable of doing that
and he said that most time when i really wanna go out, he takes me out (which is true too, i prefer hanging out with him over my friends, and the same with him)
so am i wrong for making him doing things my way without considering his feelings?
he thinks it's just completely irrational that i demand him just to sit home and watch tv at friday
and he just now called to say sorry for what he said (about breaking up and not being together)
so am i wrong?
is he a good boyfriend?

am i a bad girl friend?

Answer 1

Perhaps you should give it a rest with this guy. Maybe you're moving in different directions. He will resent you if you don't want him to do what he thinks is fun. I don't like going out to clubs so much either, so why not give me a call?

Just joking, sorry. But I meant my advice.

Answer 2

ooo...tough one. my husband and i came to a point while we were dating that we didnt feel a need even to go to clubs anymore. it seems that you know what clubs are really for..."meeting" people. anyways, from your standpoint it seems that you are on a different level in the relationship than he is and he is acting like an immature little d ick head. he was being really harsh and unfair to you and he has to know it if he was telling you that you are acting bitchy and upset. guys always somehow bring it up as if we are not allowed to be right, when we are upset about something that truly hurts us that he did wrong we are getting bitchy or moody, so no he is most certainly wrong there. tell him if he keeps going out that you are done because you dont want him out there dancing with other girls. it is fair because you treat him with that respect and you have every right for it to be reciprocated. i would say forget about it...stop wasting your time with him if he is being a jerk. what you get now is what you will get after you are married, nothing will get fixed or change after you are married by the way so if after three years you are unhappy, move on!

you are NOT a bad girlfried by the way...you want to be faithful and honest with him...he should respect the two of you by going to respectable establishments...not clubs, not stripbars or places singles go to in order to get picked up you know!?!!! Have him go out to movies or whatever else guys might want to do together but a club is not a place for a guy who is "faithful" to his girlfriend of three years. a relationship IS give and take. he ought to respect your wishes on whether or not he goes out to clubs if you would not like him to go there or if you would not even go there yourself.

Answer 3

No you is not wrong for going crazy on him because if ya'll is in an relationship then he should have respect for your opinion and not go to clubs no more and if he don't respect that then he shouldn't deserve you. And if he say that ya'll should not go out anymore then he really not feeling you no more. So you being the smart person you should enjoy your self and go to the club and get you a real man that deserve you in your opinion. Because for real ya'll stay in different cities that is not good!

Answer 4

I really beleive that you need to go out with your own friends and since you guys are not married no one should be able to demand anything from each other. Since you guys have been together for 3years now he probably thinks that he can have you time i know this because you sound like me with ex boyfriend but if you really want him there start going out and stop telling what to do and he will be surprised. It will take a weeks but it will click. He really does mean it when he saids hes going to break up with you if you don't stop. guys don't like to fight. Especially he wants to be going out. so now you need to put your foot down and stop sweating him so that he can sweat you by pretending not to care and beleive me he will change

Answer 5

if it doesn't feel right don't force it. it is better to be single than to be in a relationship where u are not 100% you at all times. so let it go and move on. u will be better in the long run

Answer 6

He is not right for you. Clues like this spell big trouble should you stick with him.

I would definately move on even if this guy begs you to stay.

Bars.........women and booze. Thats what he wants. Let him be.

Answer 7

You deserve RESPECT and be caring to your self-esteem, don´t let him make you feel like trash because you aren´t, TRUST, UNDERSTANDING, UNCONDITIONAL LOVE AND RESPECT ARE VERY IMPORTANT IN A RELATIONSHIP.
WOMEN SHOULD BE LOVED AND BE ADORED.
Good luck! Bye

Answer 8

when the cat is away the mice will play. Move on he out with other chicks

Answer 9

definitely you are wrong with this. please feel free to tell everything to your boyfriend, leave him to go to clubs with buddies.