Is it ok for adoptive parents to change the name of their new baby if the name is awful? I did.?

Question

My husband & I adopted twins 6 years ago, when they were 7 months old.

The boy's name was Damien Kane (named after The Omen character and Cain in the Bible who commited the 1st murder).

The girl's name was Pandora (named after the Greek mythological woman who opened up the box that let out all the evils of the world).

We renamed the twins Cameron & Laura (phoenetically similar to Damien & Pandora).

Yes- Their birth parents were into evil stuff. I am a Christian.

I get criticized frequently that their names were changed. The twins like their names, know about the adoption, know about their "birth neames". We have no secrets held from them.

Did we do the right thing?

Answer 1

Oh my gosh this question breaks my heart! Of course that is ok. I can't imagine not accepting their new names!! First off...these kids have a better life because of your carin nature. Second off...these kids have parents that care enough about them to take their feelings into account when you name them. The fact that the parents took their own beliefs in account while naming their children in ridiculous. They are VERY lucky to have christian parents who care about them the way you do. The fact you have phonetically tried to match their names makes this point even easier to prove. As long as putting their own thoughts and feelings before yours that is all that matters! God Bless.

Answer 2

They are YOUR children, you have the right to name then anything you want.

Personally, I prefer Damien and Pandora to Cameron and Laura, and I don't feel their names are evil at all. Remember, in the story, Pandora not only released the badness into the world, she also set free Hope. And there was a Saint named Damien, from the third century, the patron saint of physicians. Also, I have a cousin named Kane.

BUT, none of that has any bearing because these are YOUR children's names, and you can change them to whatever you want. People would be out of line if they criticized you for naming them Hansel and Gretel or River and Ocean.

Answer 3

Absolutely. They are your kids now and need to become a part of your family. You are giving them love and a safe and protected world to grow up in, their birth parents gave them up. I hope you didn't tell them they were named after evil though....they are too young not to feel confused and bad about that. Instead, tell them "my heart called you Cameron (or Laura) and my lips followed, I just thought the name suited you" (or him if you are defending yourself from adults). When they are older they will learn the true meaning of their birth names and you can laugh about how even sometimes he ACTED like Damien he was really your angel from heaven. He will also appreciate that you didn't dis his genetic
parents by critisizing their name choices, at least they didn't have the abortion, there must have been some spirituality in them and a lot of pain too but focus on the good in them and give your children that as well. Don't let people oppress and discriminate against you. Christians are a group that is really discriminated against, I am not particularily religious at all but this is a country that protects freedom of religion and just because it may be the "majority" religion practiced by people in this country doesn't mean people have the right to opress it or cast judgements on people because of it.

Answer 4

I think you did the right thing.Most people that adopt a toddler or child change their names.There's nothing wrong with that.Most who change the child's name just do it because they want to, you one the other hand had a very good reason.Plus if the children would have kept his and her name, they would have really gotten picked on a lot.Kids get teased over there names any and there's wouldn't have helped.My Aunt adopted a girl that she'd had in foster care since she was seven(adopted at 11) and her name was johnny.After she adopted her she changed her name to Kara and now she is so happy with her new name.Before everyone would think she was a boy when anybody was talking about her.I support what you did 100% and would've done the same thing.

Answer 5

Yes, you did the right thing. I think you get a thumbs up just for telling them the truth about everything as well. Good for you, and whoever is criticizing you, they can just go deal with it... it's done, get over it. You were doing a wonderful thing by allowing these two beautiful children into your home and raising them as your own. Good for you! I just personally see nothing wrong with this situation at all. I'm sure many adoptive parents change the birth names, if the baby was young enough, I would probably do the same. You're a good Mom-don't let anyone tell you otherwise. ;)

Answer 6

I think it is okay. I'm adopted. My biological parents named my sister Mildred and she hated it. So, my adopted parents went to court and had her name changed.

You have to remember these are your kids now whether they were adopted or not. I think you made the right decision in having their names changed. You have to do what is best for your kids no matter what it may be whether big or small.

I too am a Christian and I can totally understand your dilemma with the original names.

I wouldn't worry about what others are thinking about you guys having the names changed. It may sound mean, but, they aren't the ones who have the children and they aren't the children who would have to grow up with the original names. I have found out it is easier for someone to criticize when they HAVEN'T been in your shoes and they have no clue the circumstances surrounding. Keep your heads up. I honestly feel you did the right thing.

Answer 7

I think that if the baby is young enough then absolutely! In the case of poor Pandora and Damien I think I might have wanted to change their names at ANY age! You cant have children with satanic names running around your Christian home, its just not right! So to you and your husband, GOOD JOB! Cameron and Laura are much better names!!!

(You don't have to tell people that you changed their names, it may cut down on the gasps and comments.)

Answer 8

I'm adopted when I was three months old and they changed my name. It never bothered me, I always knew my "birth nam" and I like the name I have best because it is a family name (and by family I mean the family that raised me which is the only family that I even really think about). Two years later my parents adopted again. My brother was six months old and they changed his name as well.

I think it's perfectly fine and probably much better for the kids. It always made me feel like a better part of my extended (adopted) family because I had a name that my adopted parents chose for me.

Hope this helps!

Answer 9

Being an adoptee myself, I don't think you did the wrong thing. First of all, you are honest with them and have kept no secrets which is very admirable of you as a lot of adoptive parents are not so forthcomming. You are right, the names not only sound very odd, but have awful meanings. You want the best for your babies, so why not start fresh and give them your first gift of love - names that will give them confidence and propel them into bright and successul futures. You did the right thing because you are their mother and you love them unconditionally.

Answer 10

Of Coarse! It is common for adoptive parents to change the names of their children. You have every right! The names the birth parents gave them are not the names you would give your children and when they gave up the twins they have no rights to naming them! You did the right thing and anyone who has the nerve to say differently, have certainly no manners and it is none of their business!