my ex-boyfriend keeps calling me everynight. and although ive made it clear to him i dont want anything serious with him anymore he said he'd try anyway.. eventhough i told him to stop calling me.. he still calls.. whenever he calls me he opens up topics about the future where I plan to work, my plans after graduation, etc.. and then he popped up a proposal if we could get married right after my graduation.. so i told him we're not even back to girlfriend-boyfriend mode.. and im not sure if i still want "us".. i told him not to wait.. and to plan a future without me.. but it's not working.. lately he signed a contract in an immigration agency for the US.. he just have to take some examinations and within one and a half year he could migrate to the US.. and he is still telling me.. he wants me to go with him.. i asked him, "why would i go with you?".. he answered me "fiances can be considered an immediate family member and can be included in his migration"...
2006-12-01 15:39:55 · 12 answers · asked by evismea 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
so i told him "im not your fiance not even your girlfriend, we're just friends".. so i told him again "what if i won't agree to your plans?" then he asked "why not?" i told him "because im not ready and i think we still have a lot to learn, because we're very young". then he said that if im not ready he'll wait. so i told him, just go abroad when your time to go comes and ill just be here but im just not ready to go with you.. and he said.. "im not going without you".. then i told him he cannot put his life on hold. i told him he has to take the risk and go and if God wills it, we'll be back together someday. but do you know what his response was? he said, "ok what is the main reason that you can't be my fiance, marry me, and go with me?" when all along i have already told him right?!!!!!!!!! so i decided to paraphrase my reason and told him, "because i am not ready personally to get into marriage and i think you should see a whole lot about the world and other women first"..
2006-12-01 15:41:07 · update #1
well he said if my reason is im not ready personally he'll wait for me.. but the problem sam is.. he won't go abroad without me!!!!!!! he'll just wait for me.... he'll really wait!!!!!! he even got mad when i said about "other women" because he said im doubting him! i dont know what to do with this guy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2006-12-01 15:41:30 · update #2
STOP ANSWERING THE PHONE. Problem solved. The end.
2006-12-01 15:41:22 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think he wants you to help with his immigration process. If he marries you he can become a citizen through marriage. What he is doing can be considered stalking. You could very easily put an end to this by taking legal action. Why do you answer the phone if you have caller ID and know it's him ? Stop answering the phone. If he leaves messages just delete him. If he is calling your cell phone talk to your service provider and have his number blocked. There are a lot of things you can do to avoid this guy but I think you are encouraging him by giving him too much of your time.
2006-12-01 23:49:24 · answer #2 · answered by David C 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds sort of like he just wants to use you to be able to immigrate. I don't know though. But if so, it sounds like he thinks you are his only hope. Perhaps you can find if there is some other way he could do this, refer him to some organization that would help with it, and then tell him to leave you alone.
It also sounds a bit like you are not completely sure yourself that you don't want you both to be an "us" so in order to be convincing to him, you have to make a firm decision one way or the other.
Good luck to you.
2006-12-01 23:44:17 · answer #3 · answered by mch 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
in some ways you are giving him mixed signals. you stated that you told him that you are not back to being boyfriend and girlfriend mode. that could lead him to think that you will be. listen if you really don't want this guy and in so many words it sounds like that's what you are trying to tell him. the next time he calls that this will be the last time you and he will be speaking, that you are getting your number changed and that he needs to move on. you could also tell him that you are dating someone.
2006-12-01 23:47:42 · answer #4 · answered by here to help 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If u really don't want him put ur foot down and let him know that. It ultimatley up 2 u in the long run, so do what u feel is right. Good luck
2006-12-01 23:45:13 · answer #5 · answered by 1hotmama 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get a restraining order and never talk to him or see him or have any kind of contact with him again. Completely cut him off.
2006-12-01 23:44:18 · answer #6 · answered by redcherri817 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow, what a creepy ex, with that you have to be blunt and to the point, say you don't want him and never will, and then try to ignore him for a few days
2006-12-01 23:44:26 · answer #7 · answered by Todd M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
obviously this isnt the best place to get answers cause the people who answer them are jerks! so y dont u go to http://www.anythingadvice.wetpaint.com and ask her. she really can hel u. and her advice is good. i used it. it worked!
2006-12-01 23:43:30 · answer #8 · answered by rlum0606 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
kick him and a call the cops an tell them you have a stalker. that'll take care of HIM
2006-12-01 23:44:12 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I would move, change my name, disconnect your number and never look back...he sounds whacked!
2006-12-01 23:45:40 · answer #10 · answered by javaluv2002 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋