Do you believe that people can't change unless they want to?

Question

I see so many people on this site trying to pound their beliefs (whatever they may be) into others and it just makes me think, do they honestly believe that it will change anything? My personal philosophy is that, unless I want to listen and learn, it will do you no good to tell me to change.
Yes I understand that you need to stand up for what you believe in and to in some cases your religion comands you to "witness" (or the equivalent of, depending on your faith). I just don't see how that gives you the right to attack others, sometimes quite viciously. Don't people know that is only going to push someone away?
No I am not tryign to single any one religion out, I just used witnessing as an example.

Answer 1

you're on the money.
people with deep convictions will only change their oppinion when faced with a situation they have never expected.
Maybe a war vet will lose his only son or daughter in a war he has been defending, maybe an pro-lifer might get raped and impregnated, maybe a pro choice advocate may lose the ability to reproduce.
Sometimes it takes extreem irony to get a person to look at things differently.
Every one of us better just be careful of what we preach - myself included and especially.

Answer 2

I am a christian and I deffinently agree no one is going to change unless they truly want to. Just like you cant change your grades unless you get up and do it. If you are unmotivated what will your personality come off as? A failure usually! It just makes things harder! (although I do keep grades up or fix them wether I like to or not, but there is deffinently some amount of motivation in there)

I also agree with the fact that ones belief should not be forced on another, and if one asks them not to do so, as a friend or person, that needs to be respected. I do not agree with christians or other religions going viciously about spreading there message, but like you also said, with christians, it requires us to witness. God asks us to witness with love, and patience. After all, who are we to get mad and judgemental and bossy? Those arent our words, and if God wants us to witness he will choose those he wants to. These things should be under God's control. We may get mad, no human being is perfect and no christian of course, but the bible says "Be angry and sin not".
I only ask that you will not judge all christians when they make such a useless choice, and end up pushing some away. I can tell you I know many who are not like this, and I certainly try not to be arrogent or unkind, or like the very opposite of what I should be! Although I know God's truth, and will speak it to those who do not protest.
There ARE words that will change a persons belief and life forever, but I agree that people need to say it at the right times and in a more peaceful and not harmful and judgemental way.

I hope I did not say anything offensive towards you, and may God bless you! I hope you find clarity.

Answer 3

People who have been raised to believe in a judgmental punishing God often have never considered that this idea may not be true.


For years I was one of those people. Then one day I heard someone say that this was not true.

At first this sounded absurd. But the more I thought about it the more I realized that it just could not be true. Now I try my best to help others to see that God is unconditionally loving and would Never judge or punish anyone.

Love and blessings Don

Answer 4

I completely agree. I believe that someone can change only if they want to. Pushing opinions and any way of thinking on others does not create anything but a ridge between the people and sort of automatically makes them opponents. Since this country has freedom of religion and a constitution, it seems that each is entitled to his own, and if he wants to let others know about how he thinks or what he knows to be true for himself, he has to find someone ready to listen, or at least bring them to a point they do want to listen, by communicating and not pushing themselves on the other.

Answer 5

perhaps a question or answer will reach someone who either needs or wants to hear or know or tips them off to something they are missing. People can change under pressure even when they do not want to, but not on here cuz there is no way to exset pressure, and who really wants to do that anyway. I used to counsil high risk kidz in a residentuial setting and that is a difficult job. Seekers however is another story.. There are seekers on here sometimes.

Answer 6

The only way a person can change is to become a new creature in Christ. If you put yout faith and trust in what the Lord Jesus Christ did on the cross for you then you can become a new creature. 2 Corinthians 5: 17 Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.

Answer 7

It's really impossible to consciously change your beliefs just like that. You have to be convinced, and sometimes, convincing yourself of something is HARD. I mean, in a very real sense, I WANT to be convinced that God exists, because in another real sense, believing in Christianity makes life easier. But if I don't believe in the existence of God, I don't believe it. It's just that simple. What are those things that can change my beliefs? As a general rule for me, observational science and logical proofs. Theories are nice, but I keep those in the "maybe" category. That's why I'm agnostic.

Answer 8

Yep, I believe your completely right. Outside of outstanding circumstances nobody's going to up and believe something else just because somebody up and contradicted them, especially in some rude or insulting manner.

I don't even think some of those people do these things to get others to see their point of view. I think they like to call people out on what they deem stupid so they can feel better(smug) about themselves and thus reassure themselves on their own beliefs.

Answer 9

Humans have a natural resentment about being told what to think and do.
It comes from being told these things all the time when we are young.
Many people will "cut off their nose, to spite their face", to prove you
can't "tell" them what to do!
People who try to force others to thier way of thinking, defeat themselves.

Answer 10

I think you're right ... unless someone is open to new ideas, they will never change their mind .... especially if the person trying to present their point of view is doing it aggressively ... or without a reasoned argument.