I have been dating my boyfriend (has been my friend since we were 17) for almost a year. He never stays home for an entire day. I feel small daily, he would rather spend time with his brother than at home. He doesnt want me making up with his parents after we had a huge fight and does nothing to make me look better in their eyes. He is a high school drop out and does part time cash under the table construction work. When he gets money he buys pot and whatever he needs. He has paid bills maybe twice and we live together. He never wants to go with me to my families house or my friends houses. He doesnt think he should have to tell me where he is going or when he'll be back. And when he is home, we dont talk. He tells me I pick the wrong times to talk. When he is watching tv, that is the wrong time. And he is obsessed with his brother. He spends everyday with him. Even on Thanksgiving I had my family here and spent time at his brothers house. Is this a normal relationship?
2006-12-01 15:17:42 · 12 answers · asked by Krystal A 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
No. Sorry to break it to you but this is not normal. He shouldn't try to keep tabs on you 24-7, he should always listen to you and be loving towards you and spend time with you, and most important, you don't need to be living with someone that does drugs. You should kick him out or maybe you could move somewhere else. Your relationship is unhealthy for so many reasons because of your guy. I say leave him and move on.
2006-12-01 15:21:47 · answer #1 · answered by texashairdiva1980 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is abnormal. Don't let him make you feel small. If he'd rather spend time with his brother let him but don't feel inferior. It sounds like you are just something to do for now and surely he does not love you. This explains why he really don't want you involved with his family that much and would miss Thanksgiving. A man does not expect to live rent free and not pay bills there is nothing in a man's nature that expects this so this loser has found a nice girl like you to manipulate. All men know that being apart of a relationship means you inform your partner (not report in) of where you will be most of the time. Communication is the key and he never wants to do this: you are just a convenience and he can't even bother to talk to you. This is really not normal.
2006-12-01 15:31:31 · answer #2 · answered by Enchanted Crystal 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I just went through something similar and needed a real big reality check. He didn't do drugs but he was gone all the time and did not spend any time with our new born child. Sorry if this is blunt but move on. He isn't interested in a relationship and you deserve better. You need to find someone more compatible with you. You really should take some time and be honest with yourself. Do you want this for the rest of your life. Do you care enough about yourself to treat yourself better then this. Can you see yourself here at 89? I can guarantee you, you already know the answer and it is okay to be selfish and say I deserve better then this and go get it.
2006-12-01 15:26:54 · answer #3 · answered by cheoli 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No it is not normal. You can try discussing things with him, attempt to make him see your point of view and why you are upset. If he really cares he will take a step back and look at his behavior and hopefully make the necessary changes to be a better, more productive person. If he chooses to continue down the same path he is taking right now, then it is best for you to get out of that situation and find something better. We can never change another person. I think the fact that he smokes pot has a lot to do with his attitude towards life and relationships. It has clouded his mind to the point where he is unemotional and completely oblivious to what is going on around him. It's selfish of him to ignore your feelings in this situation. Talk to him - that is all you can do. He will have to want to change.
2006-12-01 15:24:17 · answer #4 · answered by lop 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I sorry to say this but he doesn't seem like he is interested in you anymore. The things you mentioned only tell me that he doesn't respect you. If you guys are suppose to be in a relationship he should be wanting to spend time with you. Sure it is healthy that you guys do your own thing but if it becomes a problem that your not spending time or talking to each other than it's time to ask yourself why are you in the relationship. Otherwise, he just sounds like he is sorta using you too. Your paying most of the bills...that is just wrong. If he cared he would want to take care of you and he would respect your feelings that you want to spend more time with him instead of disregarding your feelings and blaming it on you that you choose the wrong time to talk to him...that's just nonsense. Unless he gets his act together...maybe he should just move in with his brother. You deserve better than that.
2006-12-01 15:29:12 · answer #5 · answered by Sydney 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get out now, or kick his *** out now. No this is not normal, and doing pot is only going to lead to other drugs or other things such as him cheating and getting some kind of disease. I know such things and have been in such places and worse. Its time to leave and let go.
2006-12-01 15:22:15 · answer #6 · answered by micaso1971 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its time for yall to part ways, if u think things are bad now just imagine a year or two from now
2006-12-01 15:23:48 · answer #7 · answered by Sweetheart88 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
to be trustworthy. this could be the 1st journey of large men for you. i think of you're able to nonetheless try getting over him. He seems fairly a cheater if he tried to kiss you whilst he has a girl chum. i think of you're able to have somewhat time to enhance up until eventually now you even think of roughly stepping right into a courting :)
2016-10-04 15:06:31 · answer #8 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You deserve someone better who appreciates you. He is not giving you much attention and respect. I would end this relationship to save more heartbreak.
2006-12-01 15:27:00 · answer #9 · answered by hormonigraham 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dump the as*Hole... hes probably cheating on you... Kick his a*s out and tell him to move in with his brother.
2006-12-01 15:22:34 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋